How to make hard choices | Ruth Chang

Here's a talk that could literally change your life. Which career should I pursue? Should I break up — or get married?! Where should I live? Big decisions like these can be agonizingly difficult. But that's because we think about them the wrong way, says philosopher Ruth Chang. She offers a powerful new framework for shaping who we truly are.

TEDTalks is a daily video podcast of the best talks and performances from the TED Conference, where the world's leading thinkers and doers give the talk of their lives in 18 minutes (or less). Look for talks on Technology, Entertainment and Design -- plus science, business, global issues, the arts and much more.

[kp]

I didn't really fully grasp this until watching the second time around. The first time I didn't find it very helpful. In reality it's quite profound. Let go of the pro-con list and the endless comparison and analysis of every feature. Let go of fear and of taking the safer, easier route. Decide who you want to be and what you want to live for, and then choose whatever will get you closer to that. And celebrate hard choices as opportunities to define yourself and your life.

[NganHoang-dyel]

This talk can be truely life changing. I now realize.why I find it so hard to choose between two option. Because i dont know how each will turn out. And fear blinds me. By making all choices equally good, I can realize what my heart really wants. And then I can create reasons to support that decision, and working on create the path, making the choice turn out to be right. No more cofusion. Thank you.

[andyhaixinchen]

"Hard choices are hard because there are no best options."


I love this line. Thank you.

[clearmenser]

"When you come upon a difficult life choice think about who you will become when you choose one or the other. Use that to inform your choice rather than the qualities of the choices themselves."

[MsKittyCruz]

I don't want to be a drifter. I want to take charge of my life and make hard choices. Your video came JUST IN TIME. Thank you. God bless.

[emiehodeige]

8 years later this TED talk is what I needed. Deep down we know, we just need to be true to ourself and confident even if it’s scary af

[federica]

I come here and watch this video every time I am faced with a decision that could affect the course of my life. And each time I remind myself to be true to myself and the person that I am (or that I choose to be). I firmly believe that the way we choose to approach what we live really does make a difference. I am eternally grateful to have seen this video by chance all those years ago and to be able to see it again today.

I would like to wish the best of luck to all those who find themselves in the position of having to make a "difficult choice". I hope you always have the strength and courage to choose what is true for yourself.

[hamyle]

I watched this video 9 years ago when I was a college student, and until now it's still eye-opening for me. It reminds me that a hard choice is not a challenge to hinder us, it is a chance to define who we are. We have control over it, rather than let it control our decisions.

[sheepwshotguns]

so, when making hard choices, choose the option that leads you to become the person you wish you were, dont fall back on social pressures or personal fears.

there, i saved you 14 minutes.

[dishadp]

I loved the fact she mentioned how we have started evaluating life decisions according to scientific thinking. That's a real eye-opener. Decisions of life are not like length or mass that are measurable as less, more or equal. We may equate it with money but still the choices are still abstract, that's why they're hard. Simply put, hard choices are meant for you to choose what kind of life you want to "create"

[ajamesu]

This is my absolute favorite TED talk and gives me comfort before each hard choice I make. Elegant and compelling. Thank you Dr. Chang.

[Raul-lcgh]

Not gonna lie, this was better than expected.
I'm in the middle of a tough decision and this made me cry, good tears of course.

[rajivkrishnatr]

I couldn't have watched this video at a more apt time in my life. I'm totally lost trying to decide how to move ahead in life. This woman has extreme clarity and understanding of how a situation like I'm in, could be dealt with. Thank you!

[MedEighty]

Another thing about drifters is that they are never truly happy. They don't know what they want and they're annoyed about other people choosing for them.

[retroanim]

Just make a choice, then make so that it turns out to be a good one.

[Sela]

"but it's not dictated by reasons given to us. Rather, it's supported by reasons created by us."

[TheSuperk]

When it comes to lifetime decisions such us who to marry, career to choose and where to live, you have to trust your gut and feelings. You are not going to be happy if you're just rational all the time. Sometimes being right all boils down to what makes you happy.

[arandompersonful]

This talk struck a chord with me. I also "drifted" into becoming into a law student; and when people asked me why I became a lawyer, I told them I was the "least uncertain" about my career path. Seeing things from the perspective of the talk gave me some insight as to how I implicitly chose the person I wanted to become. Thanks Ted!

[MueNiki]

For me the problem is when choices impact direct other people and it s not only related to your doing

[imo]

This talk is full of wisdom. In the end, we are choosing what kind of person we will be when making a hard decision. Thank you, Dr. Chang!