Justin Lee’s Struggle as a Gay Man & Devout Christian

“I was absolutely convinced that you could not be gay and a Christian. In my mind, it was like the diagnosis for a disease.”

Justin Lee grew up in a conservative Christian family that taught him being gay was a sin. Eventually, questions about his own sexuality forced him to reconsider everything he thought he knew.

Lee came to terms with being gay but struggled to find a community and no longer felt like he belonged in the church. However, he still held on to his faith.

In college, he organized a dialogue between the evangelical Christian and LGBTQ groups on campus to listen to each other and try to knock down misconceptions they had about one another. When Lee shared his story, he realized that storytelling — and the curiosity that comes with it for the listener — is a powerful tool for bridging divides.

Lee continues to host dialogues like that today and focuses on teaching people to apply the principles of strategic conversation to the political, social, and personal causes they care most about. In 2001, Lee founded the Gay Christian Network (later rebranded to Q Christian Fellowship), which serves lesbian, bisexual, gay, transgender, queer, and straight ally Christians. His first book, Torn: Rescuing the Gospel from the Gays-vs.-Christians Debate, has been widely cited for its role in helping Christian parents understand and accept their LGBTQ kids.

Radical Heroes is a series featuring stories from extraordinary leaders demonstrating curiosity, compassion, and courage.

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[jason.m]

I’m gonna guess by a lot of these comments that most of you haven’t read his book. Justin Lee is very much gay and very much a Christian. His book talks about his life’s journey as a gay Christian trying to find the right answers. In the end Justin finds out that it really is possible for a gay man/woman to be both gay and Christian. I highly recommend his book if you’re struggling with your sexuality. God bless!

[RohitGour-pp]

Thanks for sharing your beautiful story and it really gives us strength

[heddo]

The one thing I struggle with beyond comprehension is hate. I have a struggle with hating humanity as a whole. It’s almost debilitating. I would rather struggle with sexual sin (which I have completely overcome with God’s help) than my hatred for people. One of God’s greatest commandment is to love your neighbor. If I don’t love my fellow man, I’m on my way to being estranged from God. May God help me overcome this sin.

[Koerfy]

I do not struggle with my orientation nor sexuality. I struggled with the hate and judgement, and ignorance of others towards people different than them. God loves you. He is not shocked that you're Queer. He loved you before you were born and still wants to be in your life. Ignore those who'll say love the sinner, hate the sin. It's not a sin to consensually love another person. Youre not hurting God. So dont hurt yourself believing the lies of churches that act like the Pharisees. Remember that those who crucified Christ were keepers of the laws yet they knew not the love of Christ.

[nancybryant]

I think you can be gay and Christian. And I'm sorry people are so judgmental of others. They've become obsessed with sex

[VicGeorgeK]

I've been in the gay lifestyle for a brief moment of time, but it was long enough to make me realize how depraved I was in my mind to desire sex. I thank God that Jesus Christ has saved me and has been rescuing me from that lifestyle through the renewing of my mind when it comes to the proper use of sex. For people who think they are "born gay", that part is totally irrelevant to your standing before God -- being born in a certain condition DOES NOT give you the license to disobey His commands just because your nature desires it. We are to crucify the desires of the flesh daily and let the Holy Spirit work in our lives to conform us into the image of God's only begotten Son.

[patrickmorton]

Thank you so much for sharing your testimony with "us"! It should never have been and never should be "us vs them" between any two groups of people, be it straight and gay, Muslim and Christian, etc... Other humans are not ever the enemy.

"For we are not fighting against flesh-and-blood enemies, but against evil rulers and authorities of the unseen world, against mighty powers in this dark world, and against evil spirits in the heavenly places." - Ephesians 6:12

"Owe no one anything, except to love one another, for the one who loves another has fulfilled the law. The commandments, “You shall not commit adultery; you shall not murder; you shall not steal; you shall not covet, ” and any other commandment, are summed up in this word, “You shall love your neighbor as yourself.” Love does no wrong to a neighbor; therefore, love is the fulfilling of the law." - Romans 13:8-10

"He said to him, “‘You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’ This is the greatest and first commandment. And a second is like it: ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself.’ On these two commandments hang all the Law and the Prophets.”" - Matthew 22:37-40

[SuperCommando]

Maybe. My life mirrors this man's, until the point where he felt he had to choose between being gay or Christian. At the point of that decision for me, I felt that if there is a god then he made me but why would he make me gay to then just kill me (as so many in my Christian community believed)? So, I chose differently and left the church. I agree to meet people with kindness, bur the harm here is one way...and the Christian community (most of them) are not gonna change...the harm doesn't affect them and as this man says they have no curiosity to find out why/how they harm. Its up to them to bridge this gap, and since they won't, we have to fight politically to minimize their harm...it ain't gonna come out of the chuch

[voltekthecyborg]

Honestly, anyone who says, "You're a homosexual? Then you can't be Christian because that's a sin", is directly contradicting themselves, because guess what EVERY Christian is, guess what EVERY godly man and woman is, guess what every human being is. A SINNER. If you cannot be Christian because homosexuality is a sin, then you cannot be a Christian because we all have lived and will live a sinful life until death. Christ died for us sinners, and gave us a gift of Salvation. He gave us a Gift we know we don't deserve because of our sins, but His Love for us is so great, He gave us the Gift of Salvation.

[B_Clemethy]

I struggle with same sex attraction. My choice is abstinence. The Scriptures are clear. I’m praying for God to change my desires to be in line with His Will. We must pick up our cross, deny ourselves, and follow Christ. It’s not easy, perhaps not really fair, but it is right and good. Thank you, Jesus ❤

[lexyls]

. I’ve had demons casted out 3 times, I’ve seen in visions while I repented in my sleep. I used to fornicate, gamble smoke drink etc. praise the Lord He delivered me and gave me an obedient heart to follow Him. In His Word He said touch not the unclean thing

[drpikachu]

Good for you! Remember, God does not make mistakes and open your heart to him. He has a plan 😀

[NelsonBridge-yx]

We All feel Stuff that we shouldn't, in The Book of James it says" when tempted You can't say God is tempting You, We are Tempted By our own Lust, and sinful Desires, That Means We must Be willing to Say "NO" and That's not Always easy, But Giving in to it is, which is Why I Believe Jesus said Narrow is The path that leads to Life, and Broad The path too Destruction, I like Women, But I can't go out and Do anything and Everyone I want, I have too keep it in Line with What GOD wants, if I Truly want to Honor GOD, just My Opinion 😊

[feasting.on.christ]

he brings up the point of God "turning people straight" and that it didn't happen for him. truthfully: it's not about being or being turned straight, it's about self control and not giving into our lusts/desires. we can and should give these struggles over to God. we can mourn over them, but not focus on sexuality (or whatever struggle it is for someone else.) we should focus on our relationship with God. he may or may not turn someone straight by restoring their desires. but sexuality is still not the focal point of our relationship with Him. we are always going to struggle and suffer - bringing those struggles to Him and dying to those things, as painful and isolating as they may be, are what keeps our faith alive and brings us closer to God. the more we learn to lean on Him, we gain more deeper faith, strength and confidence through His love and grace for us as His children.

[BikeVermont]

I've heard that the people who claim to have gone straight are speaking about their behavior and not about their inclination. For them straight is about actions, not about fantasies. Modern psychology has led us to demand perfect harmony between the two parts of us; Before it, people lived without too much frustration with the disjunct.

[Smith-tt]

Thank you for your story. I too am gay and seeking God

[psychiatricallyinclined]

The mental gymnastics that people use to affirm sin is incredible. So much so that complete theological reinterpretations and philosophies have been developed to justify sin. Jesus said to carry your cross and follow him. He said, "Go and sin no more." Progressive Christianity is a perversion of Scripture and is one of the tools the enemy is using to lead, even the elect, to perdition. You cannot be Christian and be a practicing homosexual, adulterer, drunkard, thief, etc. My identity is in Jesus Christ, not sin. My love is in Christ. My cross is same-sex attraction. - A former homosexual.

[ngonikamba]

I empathize with the struggle you’re facing and want you to know that I’m praying and hoping for your repentance from this sinful lifestyle. True love means warning someone of danger, even if it’s uncomfortable. For instance, if I were crossing a road with loud music playing and a truck was about to hit me, the most loving action wouldn’t be cheering me on from the side but shoving me out of harm's way—even if it hurt in the moment. That kind of intervention, though painful, would ultimately be something I’d be grateful for.

With that said, it’s important to clarify that there is no such thing as a "Gay Christian, " just as there’s no such thing as an "Adulterous Christian" or a "Fornicating Christian." Sin is sin, and as believers, we are called to recognize our sin, repent (which means to turn completely away from it), and seek the infilling of the Holy Spirit to walk in righteousness.

Christianity is not about us—our feelings, desires, or personal justifications. It’s about our relationship with Jesus Christ and our obedience to His teachings and commands. God’s original intent for humanity is clearly outlined in Genesis 1-2, before sin entered the world. In the context of your situation, I encourage you to reflect on Genesis 2:24 and Malachi 3:6, which remind us that God’s design for marriage and relationships is unchanging. He is the same yesterday, today, and forever.

[Attmay]

3:58 this and the comment section are why as a Gay man and a Jew, I am not and never will be a xtian.

Genesis 1:27

[carolynvary]

I think all these people that are trying to control others & making those others bad & wrong are the sinners or wrong doers.Jesus said do not judge others. I’m in support of everyone being true to thereselves as long as they are not harming others. I’m so tired of these false so called Christians making othered wrong when they are & think differently. Where is the compassion/ integerty. ❤