5 ways a Narcissist will Weaponize your Boundaries

Whenever we are dealing with anyone toxic or narcissistic, they will see your boundaries as a threat to their control or dominance over the relationship. The truth is, there is no connection or intimacy or emotional closeness that can come from a relationship where the other person has no respect for your boundaries.
Your boundaries aren't what's causing the conflict, it's the fact that they feel threatened that you have the ability to stand up for yourself. So let's look at some common ways toxic or narcissistic people will undermine or weaponize your boundaries against you.

#narcissism #boundaries #narcissist

[NolaCaffey]

Q: Why did the narcissist cross the road?

A: He thought it was a boundary!

[jeffreyvazquez]

Narcissism is so confusing, it’s like, they disrespect you, silent treatment, they ignore your boundaries, etc. Then you start acting out of character after months or years of the abuse, then you start reacting, yelling, say things you don’t mean, etc. then you end up feeling and thinking like you are the narcissist, no wonder this drives people crazy, you love them and stay trying to see if things will change, they only get worse and you get blamed for it all.

[sandylucas]

The worst feeling is realizing how much disrespect I accepted just because I wanted love.

[Syrupnugget]

“You won’t have to abandon yourself to make the right person happy” … damn you got me cryin in the club lol

[dianadee]

"You don't owe anyone your time, energy, attention or body"

[woopiemiddleman]

Once you grabbed the stick and fight back after being poked the 40th time, they immediately called you the abuser, the ill-tempered, and then they told the whole world you are the crazy one.

[ihanat]

The worst part of learning about narcissists is realizing you were groomed by narcissist parent to accept this kind of behaviour and then you landed in the arms of a spouse who treats you exactly the same or worse and now having to reprogram yourself entirely because you don’t even know what’s North anymore.

[PowerGurhl]

Mine would always say “you’re preventing us from having a working relationship” 😅 now I realize he is saying “you’re not letting me create the controlling relationship I want”

[nandelars]

They only apologize to manipulate. There's never a change in their toxic behavior. Fake repentance. Fake, fake, FAKE!!!

[frostykitties]

Don't question the clown for acting like a clown, ask yourself why you keep going to the circus! One my favorite quotes! Finally got that at 61!

[robcab]

A narcissistic person will push you because it was never about peace it's only about power

[fxbvl]

To all of you who are going through this, or went through this. You have nothing to be ashamed of. This isn't on you.

[Jessica-ztq]

It’s been a really difficult time lately. My five-year relationship ended about a month ago, and he was the love of my life. He made the choice to leave, and no matter what I’ve tried, nothing has brought him back. I think about him constantly and miss him more than words can say. I’m doing my best to move forward, but it’s been incredibly hard. I’m not even sure why I’m posting this maybe I just needed to let it out.

[lisakaminski]

Covert and passive aggressive abuse LOOKS and SEEMS like it wouldn't be as significantly harmful, but I would argue it's worse because it makes you doubt your judgment and sanity.

[ShalomUSA]

Boundaries are just a challenge. Go no contact. Period.

[bonobo]

I wonder how many narcs watching this rn saying "Yea, you're right, I am the victim"

[elisebrown]

Narcissists are actually extremely delicate and artful in their manipulation. I know this because I would never fall for such a thing. And then I did. The love bombing draws you in, then there's the small thing you did wrong (or did you really? Well, who cares, you'll take one for the team). And over and over, pushing you away just enough to make you really fully believe if you could just find the right thing to say or do that it would be OK. And then you find that thing (inevitably, it's some relaxation of your boundaries), and you're rewarded like a puppy dog. Over time, the rewards are harder to get, but you fight harder for them. You actually want to believe that things are your fault, because if they are, then you actually have the power to make things better by changing. The aha moment for me was when I actually viscerally realized that when he said "I guess I can't trust you, " what he actually meant had nothing to do with trust (which was very important to me.) What he meant was that I had done something he didn't like. "Trust" meant "trust you to please me at all times." Once I could detangle the self I imagined myself to be (trustworthy, honorable, loyal) from how he defined those words in relation to me, I could let go without tearing a hole in myself. I could be all those things and still leave the relationship. It's years of my life I'll never get back, but it's also proof of how insidious the manipulation can be. I can't believe how much of myself I gave up to someone whose only goal was to make me give up myself.

[lovegoodmusic]

The problem with a nacricisst is, that the person you love and is most close to you is behaving more awful than anyone else.

[kaymack]

My narcissistic mom’s funeral is today. A few coworkers came to the wake yesterday and said what a kind, funny great person she was, and I’m just sitting here thinking, wow coworkers got treated better than I did.

[brandiHeartagrams]

“When we abandon ourselves, we never experience peace” 🤯 Facts.