“People always take advantage of my kindness”

[chloeee]

Some people are just nice with everyone, naturally.

[sanghavichoppadhandi]

I have never felt so attacked in my life 😂

[lunah]

I’m just nice naturally, manipulative tendencies makes me sick tbh, I wish society didn’t see that as a cool thing

[sinnombre]

Feels bad when someone tells you one of those personal thoughts you had with yourself trying to understand if you are actually kind because you like helping people or because you want to make them feel like they owe you their friendship and they actually start liking you after it. I think I’m the second one but if I don’t do it, I don’t think I can get an entry to people’s life and get them to know me better.

[claudiaking]

Definitely seen people like this but there are also genuine ones it's knowing the difference

[King_Ottis_]

Sometimes showing kindness is like setting a tone of how you would like to be treated back. If you see my kindness as an emotional manipulation, that's who you are and we will part ways...simple as that.

[davida]

The healthiest kindness is when it is for the sake of being kind. It's just a positive thing to do and be. Good vibes. There is an unhealthy kindness, when used to manipulate. The other kindness is real and well intended but done as a symptom of having a low self-esteem. People say you're nice and then take advantage of that. They might buy you a meal at the end, and they're innocent and justified as long as you said yes to helping them. If your 3 to 6 hrs is worth exchanging for a meal, then it is says you. Yes its a friend, but you just gave up your peak value hours for a meal. A true friend would at least want you to resolve being a yes person. A real friend is bothered when they see you being used. Stop training your friends and family to expect you to drop everything to save them 5 times a week. It's disrespectful. Value your time. Even if you had planned to do nothing, say no. They will swear that you are the only person that can save them. You're just the easiest, most convenient and cheapest. You were not born to run other people's erands and or to be their personal assistant. Stop enabling them. You have your own life to organize and build. If this is you, this was me also. I just want to help you realize.

[mayabatana]

Hold on a second, I treat people the same way I'd like to be treated, that doesn't make me an emotional manipulator..

[Purrl]

I used to be a genuinely giving person but then people started taking advantage of me.

[autisticcaroline]

Being kind and a “people pleaser “ isn’t manipulative . If you don’t care about other people, you aren’t kind . I’ve always been a people pleaser and I’m far from manipulative ! I be myself and also try to meet other people’s needs at the same time as I meet my own !

[mrumbrella]

Internet definitely makes you question your self worth.

[Sonicstillpoint]

This reminds me of the nihilistic professor, with the theory that there is no such thing as altruism.

[ramyrasu]

No, it’s just simple reciprocity. If the same effort is not returned ghost them, don’t change your self for others find people who are like minded

[Sonicozz]

I just like helping people, but if that person turns around and bites me afterwards I still feel good because I did a good thing, their loss not mine

[aamnaishrat]

No it's not manipulation I do not manipulate them by giving the more but rather I believe that if I do not become the one giving more I might not be able to mix with them and I will be alone, all alone. I do it for love. Sometimes you do it because you need validation and there is some trauma which makes you think that you cannot be loved unless you give something in return.
My perception of me. Not psychology but this one hurt because I felt I was accused of the wrong.

[romulloqueiroz]

Nice people are actually the most manipulative ones, knowing that or not. It's so natural for many people that they'll never think they're being manipulative. I myself constantly have to check on my actions not to do that.

[Paula-fdlj]

I disagree with this one, some givers just give to the wrong people due to poor boundaries and low self esteem. Being nice is far from emotional manipulation when you don't know how to speak up when you know people are taking advantage of you.

[badgirlhollywood]

I found that I was trying to get my ex to like me more than his ex and it just lead to physical pain from trying to please him.

[Arkadius]

I would add solution, as this is not helpful and makes people feeling bad about themselves. From my perspective solution is to learn being comfortable with tension. There is also aspect of values but it is a bit more deep ;)

[somewhat]

People take advantage of my kindness but I usually don’t mind as long as it doesn’t harm me