Are You Bisexual Enough? (Homoromantic)

Twitter: @BisexRealTalk

Want advice about being bisexual? Email BisexualsAreCooler (at) Gmail

Bisexual Groups around the world:

US:
AZ - AzBi / BiNet Arizona, Fluid Arizona
CA - San Diego: AmBi, Bi Bar, & San Diego Bi Women
CA - LA: Monogomous Bi People Play Games; AmBi
CA - Bay Area: Bay Area Bisexual Network
CO - Denver: PAVES
DC - Bisexual Women of Color Collaborative; Center Bi (DC Center)
IL - Bi Queer Alliance Chicago
IN - Indiana Bisexuals
MA - Bisexual Resource Center
MI - Bisexual Peer Group
MN - Bisexual Organizing Project
NYC - Bi Request; FluidBiDesign; S.I.S.T.A.H; Bisexual NYC; NYABN; Non-Monosexual & Queer Meetup Group
NY - Syracuse: Queers and Beer
OH - Bi Local Columbus
OR - Bi Brigade - Portland
OR - Bi + Queer Community of Pacific NW
OR - Portaland: AmBi
WA - Seattle: Bisexual Women's Network; BiNet Seattle
WI - Wisconsin 521; Bi-versity

Canada:
Montreal - Bisexual Montreal
Toronto - Toronto Bisexual Network
Toronto - Bisexual Women of Toronto
Toronto - Bisexual Men of Toronto

Europe:

[okmoonshapedlimb]

I've been so confused with my sexuality for over 2 years. Now I 'm almost sure - I'm a heteroromantic bisexual😱

[Lillyluvsanime]

As a homoromantic bisexual, this was really validating and makes me feel good. Thank you for not going on about, "well, if you only really see yourself with women then you're a lesbian not bi" or whatever else. It means a lot. I am attracted to men as well, I just happen to be more interested in women and non-binary people. Again, thanks, it really means a lot.

[zafireshadows]

I love how you asked "Could a virgin say they are straight?" I have used this analogy so many times to explain that though I am engaged to a man and I have never *been* with a woman, I am still bisexual. I am tired of hearing "But you're with a guy. So you're straight now." or "But have you had sex with a woman? How do you know?" I know because I am attracted to both genders. Me and my fiance even talk about how my type for men and women are completely different. He isn't upset that I like girls, he is interested in knowing that side of me. So if the man I plan to spend my life with can accept that, I don't see why strangers feel like they have a right to judge.

[jlbarstowful]

"If you spend your life hiding, it wears on you. It wears on you hard." Absolutely true. I didn't come out to my wife until I was in my 50s, after more than 25 years of marriage. I struggled like crazy for years. We're still working through my coming out, and charting our course, but believe me, being honest with yourself is way better than denial. Thanks Alex, another wonderful, helpful video!

[chaaa]

i wish there was a word for bisexual homoromantic because this is too long and annoying to explain every time, and just saying i'm bi feels wrong because i don't like men other than physically. i don't think i'll ever crush on, love, date, marry, have kids with a man, it doesn't impact my life in a meaningful way nor how people view me, i basically present as a lesbian but i feel attraction (only physical and with absolutely no attachment whatsoever) to men, so just bi doesn't feel right. i also wish i felt like i belong to a community, but i don't really identify with bi people in general

[krls]

Having to explain to my friends that I'm bisexual but I find guys just sexually more attractive is so hard. They never understand, and they think I'm just gay, which has even made me question my own sexuality (again). But thanks to your video I now understand myself better. Keep up the good work! We bisexuals don't have it easy.

[HeyItsNovalee]

this was such a validating video omg, like, ever since I sort of acknowledged that I'm bisexual heteroromantic, I haven't been ashamed of it, and i'm lucky to have grown up in an environment where I never had to be afraid of announcing it, but sometimes I do feel like maybe i'm not "bisexual enough" because I'll never have to face discrimination for dating a girl and haven't experienced much discrimination throughout my life. And there's the issue of culture too, because I see all these gay or queer people who make their identity literally their entire personality and their only defining trait, and while i'm very proud to say i'm bisexual and will advocate for bisexuality and representation and headcanon characters as bi and my work will include my experience of being bi, it's still like one of the smaller aspects of who I am as a person.
also like, I don't know why but I find male bisexuals, gay men and straight men to be more relatable to me than sapphic or straight women. Maybe it's my experience online idk, but it feels like there's much more gatekeeping amongst women than men who I feel like don't really care what I am lol. Despite the fact that I am very much female. Maybe because with homoromantic men I see the kinds of romantic relationships I want and straight men feel the same sexual attraction towards women that I do lmao idk.

I often get annoyed when I hear people tell me "oh everyone's a little bit gay" because I feel like it invalidates my sexuality, but maybe it should be the other way around. it just so happens that bisexuality is more broad than people think, and all the "straight people" who are a little bit gay are really just bisexual. Thank you for bringing up that point, it makes me feel better. like you said, there are definitely people who are truly gay and truly straight, i've met plenty.

anyway this turned into me just letting my thoughts out. thanks for the video!

[garlicman]

Thank you for this video! I have struggled with being bi for years because I am so much into men and only into women sometimes. I am very much looking for a boyfriend but sometimes fantasize about sex with women. I guess I am more of the homoromantic type that you speak of. Thanks for helping me to come to that conclusion

[car_go_vroom_vroom_vroom]

Thank you, I have been questioning myself lately. I've always assumed I was bisexual even forced myself to fit a straight label but I feel nothing when I kiss men, but my longest relationship was with a man (4yrs). I even married him & had a kid. Well, that relationship ended and I felt I never actually connected I just tried so hard to be straight I pushed myself to love him until he was abusive then left and now it like... Do I even like men? My whole life I just assumed I didn't like kissing. Until I kiss a woman and the entire world melted away. Now I'm asking myself an I homoromantic bisexual or a biromantic lesbian. Some men are hot some women are hot I enjoy sex with both I just feel the most myself when I am with a woman.

[ShawnBloom]

I don't get how could you not be attracted t both genders

[TheBontekraai]

Geebus, you have incredibly white teeth!

[arnas]

i’m bisexual but heteroromantic and people think i’m just a straight person trying to be interesting :(

[Slimprtty]

I am a heteroromantic bisexual! 🙋🏿‍♀️
🖤🤍
💗💜💙

[NancyLionStorm]

Excellent video. Repression of bisexual pride can contribute to obesity and other long range self destructive behavior.

[Stuart]

Took me a long time to come out as bi. Since I came out last year I feel so much happier.

[duolingoowo]

I’m attracted the opposite gender quite a bit and I’m not not attracted to the opposite gender but I just, can not see myself in a long term relationship with a man. I can see myself dating men and having relationships with them but I can’t imagine said relationships being long term for some reason.

[Oliver-ycfi]

Wait... so I'm still bisexual? I've been identifying as "mostly gay and/or homoflexible". So I'm bisexual homoromatic. Okay.

[orcenamina]

Thank you *so much*. I've only recently started to realise how much of mental strain and time and energy these kinds of questions have taken from me for YEARS - especially because my romantic and sexual orientations never really seemed to line up. I tried to tell myself that I didn't care, that I might as well just call myself straight. Other times I told myself that I didn't need a label - which is perfectly valid, of course - but none of those things ever felt right to me. This does.

Your video helped quell a lot of my dissonance. Again, truly, thank you.

[mustache]

Very helpful video, thank you so so much

[Lola-yfee]

I was always confused...now I know that I'm a homoromantic bisexual