When Silence Makes You Anxious

[carinaruiz]

My mom used to use the silent treatment to punish me as a kid, so when people I love are quiet, I think they’re mad at me and it really messes with my head.

[LittleLulubee]

Aww, imagine if everyone had a partner who was so communicative and understanding ❤️😭😭

[sineadw]

I had both chaos or passive aggression, so silence was hard for me for a long time. I have a daughter who is autistic and living with her has thought me that sometimes when there is silence it’s just because there’s nothing to say 🤣. She’s a blessing

[alanaxstitcher]

I used to have this exact conversation with my mom except she WAS upset but would say “why would I be upset?” To which I would say “I don’t know but you seem upset because you are so quiet” and she would say “well if you don’t know then probably I have no reason” - which was code for “you should know why I’m pissed”. Ugh so exhausting.

[sarahpeterson]

I wish someone had the patience to speak to me this way when I was worried. This is very true as to why I feel that way. That and the abandonment issues.

[nicolesaintdenis]

My little inner child heart just got punched. This is me... Almost like you create an issue because there's silence. Silence is scary but you can learn to sit in it ❤

[MessiahRamsay]

Yo this has fucked me up for years. Only in my mid twenties am I becoming comfortable with sitting around people in silence. Thank you for sharing ❤

[vince]

That deep inhale at the end summarizes basically my entire life.

[HOIsWater.]

I wish I knew this 13 years ago when I moved out of my mother's house. People who were just quiet around me could make me cry with the huge built-up pressure I felt. It felt as if smb was holding a gun to my head and it could shoot any moment but I could not predict when. It was that stressful not know what's "going on" when in reality they were just quiet and chill. I was used to emotional rollercoaster 24/7.

[amandalynn]

UGH this is me... I always think someone's upset with me. And I'm hypersensitive to others' moods and changes in attitude, etc.

[mojo]

There are plenty of ppl who will not speak to you, and when you ask if everything is okay, they will say yes when they really are angry and they are just trying to hurt you by keeping you wondering and frozen out. I call it emotional blackmail.

[ZLLi]

This was me until I was 21. Moved away from the psychos, learnt that people are quiet aren’t about to be irrationally angry and yell at me for some perceived slight or just yell in general for any perceived slight of anything. Took about 5 years away from the main psycho to be able to adjust to actual reality. Another 5 years away to be able to not go straight into flight freeze mode when this psycho raised his voice because I learnt to be able to protect myself. 30 years on I still have an immediate reaction ready to protect/fight as soon as a male raises his voice to that same banshee level I was subjected to by that psycho ranting growing up. 🙄.

[flowerchild]

I can relate to this a lot. Silence always meant that someone was upset with me.

[jessicabeall]

Thank you for showing what it looks like. It has a huge impact.

[cardsFacedown]

That deep breath at the end there was because typically that's when the explosive parent would explode.

[Minerva-lfuu]

a relationship like this please

doesn't have to be romantic, even platonic would make me happy.

[phabulouss]

I was raised by chaos, therefore, I relate to this short quip; while waiting for the 👞 shoe to drop. 😮

[amberklein]

Wow. This made me cry.
What an eye opener.

[IDontKnow-pfen]

i woulda cried at that last sentence. my house therapist recently said she cared about me, and i literally burst into tears! God Bless!

[JennyNobody]

Fearful avoidant. Ive had to learn how to accept quiet due to my primary parent's use of both extreme anger and the silent treatment.