Signs You're a Perfectionist (And How to Get Help)

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Do you know someone who is controlling, overly-focused on details, or closed off to new perspectives or ways of doing things? They may have the most commonly-diagnosed personality disorder, obsessive-compulsive personality disorder or OCPD - which is often confused with, but much different than, the better-known condition OCD. Welcome to the MedCircle original series, “OCPD: Co-Existing with the Perfectionist and Coping with Control.”

You’ve probably heard the phrase “you’re so OCD.” According to Dr. Ramani, the personality disorder OCPD is the condition people are ACTUALLY but unknowingly referring to when they use it.

In the rest of this series, Dr. Ramani covers...
OCPD 101: Why it’s an issue & how It’s different from OCD
The causes of OCPD: who is most at risk?
The unique signs of OCPD & how to spot them
The 8 characteristics of OCPD, according to the DSM
Testing for OCPD & how to convince someone to see a doctor
OCPD treatment: the ins & outs you should know
Improving with OCPD: what long-term management looks like

#perfectionism #personalitydisorder #perfectionist

[kmix]

I love her. Such a wealth of knowledge but in an approachable and non judgemental way. And Kyle is a great host

[sahar]

She's just perfect. They way she talks, her voice and the way she delivers the information in a simple and easy way. I can listen to her for hours. I wish I was her student 😍

[LTHEC]

Even the dog was like "let me lay down & listen to this, she really knows her stuff."

[patrss]

"They make lists but don't get things done" omg... I feel so seen! The amount of hours I have spent writing and tweaking lists and perfecting them over time but never actually getting the stuff done

[Driveontheroad]

SO appreciative she made the distinction between OCD and OCPD. I experienced severe OCD as a teenager and in my early 20s and it was ANYTHING but perfectionistic. Not only was I acutely aware that the compulsions were not in line with societal norms, I was extremely debilitated by them. It's so frustrating when people use language like 'I'm so OCD about that' just because they're orderly or rigid. OCD causes major anxiety and often greatly hinders the day-to-day functioning of the sufferer.

[ZoraXire]

I dated someone with OCPD. Everything in his house had an EXACT place, it was overly organized to the point it actually made me nervous. He would even take his car apart every Sunday and clean every single part of it and put it all back together and put in new oil, every single Sunday like a religion. Speaking of which we met because we went to the same church, and we broke up because one day I broke my heel coming into the church and because of that we were 2min "late" to his normal time he liked arriving at the church, and there was an elderly couple sitting in "his" pew. He wanted to demand they leave, but I stopped him and told him they were both very old and it wouldn't be fair nor nice to ask them to move, so let's just sit in another seat today, there was plenty of room. He did end up doing it, but was white knuckled the entire time and after mass was over he dumped me because I didn't respect him and couldn't understand how important his was of doing things was to him. I was shocked and hurt at the time, but really looking back it's very easy to see this was an individual who needed more help than I or any average person could give him. I hope he did finally start seeking therapy and is doing well in life, but who knows. I never heard nor saw him again after that day.

[jewelthompson]

I see Dr.Ramani, I click ❤❤ Thank you again, Medcircle.

[wildangel]

I love how the dog just sits there and chills

[carolcohen]

I am always in awe of people who are very tidy and organized but notice that attachment can make them anxious just like us slobs suffer from our clutter.

[davegball]

I came to this video as a diagnosed self perfectionist. It's worth having some compassion for the perfectionist because it can be a terrible affliction. Perfectionism has ruined my life and lead me to a near complete break down. This is not me expecting other people to be perfect but self perfectionism. It can be a debilitating affliction. I've been in therapy for years and on medication sometimes just to get through the week.

[kita]

I have OCPD. The way she describes it she makes me feel like I am a terrible person. 😞 it doesn’t always feel good. I have anxiety and depression too. Also, chasing perfection really sucks, I work all time to organize but I also keep things I shouldn’t keep. So it’s a struggle. I’m also a very empathetic person. So who knows. I am not very flexible but I’m not so bad like she explains here. I do notice that when I am going through more issues, my anxiety goes up and I need to control the organization around me more. But I’m not controlling people, although it does come up in my mind, I don’t.
I wish she didn’t make us sound like villains.

[jadeauburn]

I fill some of the criteria but I'm such a people pleaser and super empathetic I only direct these thought patterns at myself.

[liverofADPIE]

Your analogy about the plastic-covered furniture but no grand children was SO easy to see. Yes, we make things important that shouldn’t be. Thanks to you both.

[LittleSparrow]

As a person with OCPD, just know some of us aren’t that rude. As much as I hate people being late and such I’m never going to be like that to someone. I take a deep breath and I walk away if I’m really mad. Some people just need therapy to improve upon themselves so they are not assholes.

[cookycandy]

kyle’s consistent appreciation of making this series and speaking with such an expert is also really heartwarming. she is a star in her field and i’m so glad to live in a time where i have access to these explanations and understandings of a condition i might have is explained in clear and concise detail with such care, and similarly kyle’s genuine enthusiasm and approach towards extrapolating that information is so soothing in a world that heavily stigmatizes these personality disorders. never change, kyle.

[nina-bhnx]

My aunt is one. When we got into an argument she told me once how my house was dirty. She had only been to my home on the day I moved. It will always be a mess on the day I'm moving. But it was nice to know how she really felt.

[ninacael]

I relate to the time management-rigidness very much. I remember a specific story when I was like 8, my mom raised me by herself but she was very very depressed, she basically never worked, cooked, cleaned, or left her bed, and after a while of none of my teachers meeting a parent or a guardian for me, my teacher sent me home with a note that either my parent/guardian would show up to a PTA appointment or she would have to get CPS involved. So I gave her the note, we had a 9am apt with a teacher of mine, and she said she would go, but at like 8:50am I still could not drag her out of bed and force her to wake up, I remember actually physically dragging her and crying and just being like mom, please, they're gonna take me away if you dont get up. Ever since I was a kid, I've been obssesivelly showing up to places hours and hours ahead of time, waking up for school at like 4am because I was horrified of being late, and even now, in my twenties, that is how I treat all my obligations. Someone being even five minutes late will literally bring me to tears. I cannot mentally handle it. Even if it's like my birthday and I'm supposed to go out and have a good time with friends, if they're late, I will end up sobbing and breaking down. It's kind of ruining my life to be honest, just doing everything so specifically and so much ahead of time than I need to, I literally have no time for myself anymore.

[marie]

I've often read and experienced hoarding as a symptom of OCPD

[barrilha]

Dr Ramani is such a GOOD teacher! Love videos with her. Kyle's great interview skills makes it even better!

[ricofernandez]

Klicked immediately the second I saw a new video with Dr Ramani