Why Can't I Remember My Childhood Trauma? Understanding Trauma & Disassociation

This is a excerpt from Ross Rosenberg's latest live seminar entitled: "Healing the Inner Trauma Child (HITCH) Treatment Method: Understanding Complex Attachment Trauma." In it Ross speaks about the nature of Self-Love Deficit Disorder's (codependency) trauma origins, and why recalling it, is nearly impossible.

This seminar is not only beneficial for various helping professions, but it holds equal value to a general audience. Considering most mental health practitioners and other helping professionals have struggled with their own SLDD, this training will resonate and have deep emotional impact on them as well.

ABOUT ROSS
Ross Rosenberg M.Ed., CADC, is Self-Love Recovery Institute’s CEO and primary contributor. His internationally recognized expertise includes pathological narcissism, narcissistic abuse, and attachment trauma. Ross’s “Codependency Cure™ Treatment Program provides innovative and results-oriented treatment. His expert educational and inspirational seminars have earned him international acclaim, including his 21 million YouTube video views and 230K subscribers. In addition to being featured on national TV and radio, his “Human Magnet Syndrome” books sold over 138K copies and are in 90 languages. Ross provides expert testimony/witness services.

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#innerchild #trauma #healingtrauma #attachmenttrauma #disassociation #psychotherapy #rossrosenberg

[ashleyelaine]

Omg finally! I know in my bones I was molested as a kid by one of my parents. Hyper-sexuality, performing sex acts on myself with dolls, cps coming to the school to ask, trying to with other kids, nightmares, physical abuse I remember, even a bit of touching, multiple “utis” treated at home ect. Later forced into sexual relationships by the parent. I have a daughter who is about to be in the grade when the acting out started and now I’m suffering from debilitating c-ptsd and I’m starting to get flashbacks but man this is crazy. I finally don’t feel insane and am brave enough to go to therapy this Thursday now

[taliasmith]

I want to remember I know for a fact I was abused. Now the problem even if i dont care about the details my subconscious is suffering from it. I get bouts of depressions, unjustified self hate and self doubt. I want to remember the details to process it and finally love myself completely and get over it

[angelafleming]

I love that I finally have a scientific proof of what is going on in ny head and not another blog repeating what they learned in psych class 101...

[glidewellgirl]

Sending love to fellow survivors of childhood sexual abuse/rituals. I remember almost everything its over, yet never will be.

[amandaswan]

I’m just astounded by how common this is. Reading the comments my heart goes out to all of us who have experienced and still relive, albeit through fight or flight or anxiety or depression, those same fearful feelings but haven’t a clue where or how they got there! It makes sense that our brain is protecting us and thank goodness it does, but it leaves a gap, a hole, a void, and it is this that causes confusion, separation/disassociation and self loathing. We are stronger than we realise 💪 love yourself ❤

[theway]

God has been slowly hinting to me that I was abused somehow in childhood. I do know I was raised by narcissists. I found this out by recently getting caught in the snare of a narcissist. I never knew what that word meant until I met one. I see some toxic traits in myself and it revealed to me that I was raised by narcissists and it’s no wonder I did drugs and it’s no wonder my mom and dad are so cold and emotionally unavailable. I never noticed how cold they were until I started realizing I was chasing relationships that weren’t there to begin with. Whatever kind of bond I had with my mom and dad in the past was not what I thought it was. It was toxic.

[advancinglight]

We need a group hug here. (& I don't like clichés) I'm serious. & some too. Peace and Love to everyone. The whole world is hurting, needs healing. I start with me.

[englishrose]

I try to remember my early childhood. I can only get bits and the rest is blurred
I try and try.and it's impossible

[Lilly-evll]

I have quite a few actual memories of trauma from when I was very little, my mother was very abusive. What astounds me is that my cousin has told me of events she remembers when I would have been early teens (around 13 maybe) of my mother physically and emotionally abusing me in front of her and I have no recollection of this at all. Same goes for my partner, he can recall an event from 10 years ago (I would have been early 20's) where he had to go and collect me because my mother was being that bad and I can't for the life of me remember this! Yet I have an astounding memory, I remember great details of many things in my life so it's absolutely mind blowing to me that I have these huge memory blocks surrounding certain events. I do remember some of the abuse so it's interesting how the brain blocks some of it but not all of it 🤔

[TwoPartyIllusion]

there is a reason biology blocks memories! I feel pretty balanced despite memories that if brought up would probably ruin me. interesting presentation!

[karaa]

I think I'm done trying to remember my childhood. There are a lot of holes. I don't want to discover I was sexually abused. It's my biggest fear. I don't want to know.

[sarahbroussard]

Love learning more about psychology and the brain, it's fascinating. I personally found contact with the locked away trauma child by taking a heroic dose of psychedelic mushrooms, was having wild swings in mood and a deep feeling of desperate sadness that was leading me to a dark place and figured it was worth trying psychedelic's before potentially ending my life. Had a direct/out of body experience where I was watching myself as a baby sitting alone in the center of a large bed and watched the malnourished baby helplessly cry and scream for what felt like forever. I walked over to my baby self and talked to her because I didn't have a body and couldn't touch her, the words seemed to calm her down and she fell asleep. After this trip I felt as though a part of me was a little less anxious and fearful and even a little more conscious. I now no longer live with overwhelming subconscious pain and personal suffering and seek to keep digging deeper into myself in order to know the deeper truth and bliss of life filled with love and desire to share these findings with others.

[Maria-itqy]

"Communicates the danger without the memory" that stood out for me!
I disagree with the no exit part. There is a way of letting that trauma out. Dr. Joe Dispenza and Melanie Tonia Evans are great examples of showing how to do it. .

[kimberlymccracken]

Beautiful work, Ross - beautifully presented. I wish this was understood decades ago. Could have helped my Father without passing it on...

[melaniewang]

i'm only 17 and i can hardly remember my childhood or previous teenage years...

[heathernoelle]

Fibromyalgia, back and neck pain, so much more...how on earth do we heal our bodies. I’m 46 and have been this way for 20+ years.

[odette]

A wonderful and explanatory piece. This model makes a lot of sense. Great work Mr Rosenberg.

[fleep]

I used to think my parents were angry with each other due to what happened before I was born. I called it, "Staying married out of Obligation". Had my mother not taken him back I would not have been born. Instead, I now Realize what the marriage was/is. My Dad, the Selfish narcissist, my Mother, the Super Codependent. She did not protect my brother and sister then me. Very interesting awareness emerging.

[foxiefair]

Thank you Ross. I don’t believe in evolution, but I believe that our Creator God has created this protective action in our brains. I keep having these horrible anxiety attacks and it feels like they’re coming out of nowhere, but apparently it’s coming from something stored in my brain that I’m not conscious of. It’s very difficult to live with, though, and greatly impedes my functioning.

[wheretonext]

I’ve been able to re associate I’m 21 and I’m pretty sure this energy coming out my “core” when I relax is the “original pain” it’s a dense flow of energy that is warm and hurts you could call it the feeling of unworthiness. And the more I relax into it the better it flows out. And it does feel like my childhood despite being numb for so long when I allow it, it feels like my childhood so I guess this would be the wound I gotta sit with. I’ve been asking my self to reveal all despite having to hide it and there’s anger, which feels kinda nice (even the pain feels “good” nothing is worse than inner deadness)… but yeah we‘ll see when I arrive at my fulfilled heart or my “blank slate” that we all are underneath..