02 - Understanding Developmental Trauma - The Attunement Survival Style

In this video, Dr. May explains the Attunement Survival Style. This develops during the first two years of life as an adaptation to experiences where the your needs were not adequately attended to or fulfilled. You may then adapt with strategies such as disconnecting from needs, not expressing needs, demanding fulfillment of needs, and attending to the needs of others rather than your own (i.e., being a caretaker, rescuer, codependent).

**This channel contains videos of ALL the Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) skills, Radically Open DBT skills, Sensorimotor Psychotherapy, Attachment Styles, and much more! Please check out the other videos and feel free to SUBSCRIBE.

Key Reference: Heller, L. & LaPierre, A. (2012) Healing Developmental Trauma: How Early Trauma Affects Self-Regulation, Self-Image, and the Capacity for Relationship. Berkley, CA: North Atlantic Books.

[thejambbsneuro]

Considering the extensive knowledge and presentation skills you have ma'am, I think you're seriously under subscribed... Thank you for this amazing video... Looking forward to more information on human psychology...

[tonyburton]

Oh dear missed these. Will now watch the whole series and more of your videos...

[dylanmaxey]

Thank you for teaching this, for myself, knowing this stuff is more helpful then literal years of therapy. Your distillation of these concepts give me ease for I now understand more why I act the way I do from extensive medical trauma due a birth defect. The algorithm didn't let me find this until now, your channel deserves more eyeballs on it and many. many more subscribers. I'm happy it finally let me find your information.

[Bluemoonjellyfishh]

Thank you so so so much for this video

[daniw.]

Sublime, concise, no-nonsense and informative as always! 💕💣

[NP-fzco]

I just went through this video for the third time, creating a playlist of the other videos you suggested. Thank you so much for making these. I am entering a new relationship and realize that I have a unique chance of solving many of the still lingering issues once and for all. I am surprised that these videos don’t get more attention. Maybe because the system of survival styles and developmental trauma are still relativey unknown.

I hope you are doing well. Power to you!

[davidbradley]

Excellent video Dr May, its fantastic the way you can explain these complex theories into plain easy to understand terms

[jamestracey]

Speaking my languages as usual
, I can really identify with the pride-based yes I will take care of it attitude this is the mode I've been on since early childhood
Thank you for all that you do keep up the great work 💪♥️💪

[Nightswim_]

I don’t know how to work with Shame.
Do you know much about avpd (avoidant pd)
Apparently all pd’s are mostly development trauma based but there is not much help for avoidance and anxiety to the point of maladaptive .its quite different than just Social anxiety .
DBT apparently works with shame, but my emotions are mostly surpressed.


I also feel a severe freeze response so maybe somatic work?

Thank you for being compassionate in your presentations.

[xBrittBrittx]

Is it likely that Unsatisfied Subtypes and Caretakers/Rescuers end up in relationships with each other? I have come to know that I'm in a codependent relationship and assumed that my boyfriend had a Trust survival style but the unsatisfied subtype almost describes him to a tee.

[chantalbaeza]

All of me summed up in one video…happy sad

[CuttinInIdaho]

I know I have this, but I swear I have never felt love like I do for my 2 boys. And it's not necessary for them to be my caretaker or say anything or do anything.

I just don't feel the block that I do in other relationships.

My needs were never met as a baby. I was a premature birth & adopted to a terrible mother who was very abusive until I ran away at 13.