Rekindling Romantic Intimacy in a Relationship

Dr. Peterson reflects on the importance of conscious dating and open communication in sustaining a fulfilling connection within a long-term partnership.

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[chrismilligan]

This is spot on; I was married at 19 (now we're both 45). We were clueless and naive, and nearly separated several times. Now, 26 years into this marriage, we are using these techniques to grow closer and communicate our wants and needs regularly. And I can also say that our sexual frequency is nearly unbelievable.

[Milestonemonger]

My husband and I love to make each other laugh.
We've been married 40 years now 💘

[carolm]

My husband of 58 years passed 9 months ago. I miss our intimate times most of all.

[EvalynChurchill]

Cool video, My relationship of 5 years ended a month ago. The love of my life decided to leave me, I really loved him so much I can’t stop thinking about him, I’ve tried my very best to get him back in my life, but to no avail, I’m frustrated, I don’t see my life with anyone else. I’ve done my best to get rid of the thoughts of him, but I can’t, I don’t know why I’m saying this here, I really miss him and just can’t stop thinking about him

[liannewilson]

When my husband proposed, he promised to ‘woo’ me forever. He has kept that promise 💕

[JaketheJust]

I’m afraid whatever it is that girls like, I don’t have it. I won’t find much happiness but I can still find meaning. Becoming more competent at my job, be there to provide for my family, get myself stronger at the gym, and be a better Christian.

[PinkSallyProductions]

I feel so fortunate to be alive on this earth at the same time as Jordan Peterson. I may never get to meet him, or have the money to afford to have him as my therapist, yet I still learn so much from him. Thank you. Be well 🌹

[AFringedGentian]

I feel like intimacy was absolutely the most physically, emotionally, mentally, and spiritually healing thing you could both have done in that dark time. Intimacy is instrumental in easing pain, both physical and emotional, and releasing hormones and neurotransmitters that aid healing and bonding. As much work as it was, it was absolutely worth it, and may have saved your lives as well as your marriage. I think we don’t talk enough about intimacy between older couples and I’m glad you two are beginning that conversation because it’s important. Older people are, according to the studies I have looked at, having more and more satisfying sexual intimacy than young people, and that is a wonderful beautiful thing. A good example for many other couples.

[IlluminatedWings]

Physical, Emotional & Mental Intimacy between a couple is a conscious decision. Honest communication is the key❤& Dating one’s spouse is so important😊

[kandieb]

In my 17th year of marriage and can’t remember the last date we went on. We have 2 kids and no family nearby to watch them. For our last anniversary my husband just made a Facebook post, no card, no happy anniversary in person. I’m still very hurt by this. Now that our kids are 12 and 14, old enough to be alone for a little while I mentioned dating again. One going out date a month and one free or low cost date per month and we take turns planning the dates so each person gets to have a chance being surprised. My husband agreed.

[sphatnani]

Jordan, being intimate does not mean having sex. It could be hugs, holding hands, random touch when you are togather in outside environment. Sex if less than once a week is deteriorating, that analysis could be based on cultures that you are dealing with. If you were to expand your horizon and look into other cultures & other countries, couples are happily married long terms inspite of sex less than once a week or even once a month. Being married is more about how well you both of manage/deal things in life as togather rather than worrying about how many times you are doing it in a week. My parents are soul mates and they are so well bonded that they dont need to express that via sex. Real love kicks in when you are down and your partner partner steps up to care and hold you strong. Thats way more powerful than worrying about how many times should we do in a week.

[hollydayrobert]

16 years and 4 kids, all close in age. As a Christian wife, the book “The Good Girl’s Guide to Great Sex” changed my (then dull) perspective within our 8th yr of marriage. A book we both read that changed us for the better is “Sacred Marriage” and then we did the devotional together. Both are Christian books. It’s also amazing to understand the intricate health benefits that God created along with our more basic thought of intimacy. There’s so much more to it than we even know now, I’m sure.

[BellaGlam]

Just simply, if you are in committed relationship you need to work on it, have lots of sex, and never compromise on it, and continue dating. Beautiful!!

[Christopherurich]

I get this sense of respect for Dr Jordan Peterson like relating his values too how my Great great grandfather would of raised his son's, a man of respect, and honor too the hierarchy of the world

[kristadavis]

I wish I could send this to my parents. I feel like they are on the verge of another divorce. They were divorced for 4 years when I was in high school. They haven’t been sexually intimate in about 15 years due to physical issues from both of them. Plus, they struggle with communicating and living together when Dad isn’t working. He is 71 and really needs to retire but she pushes him to work due to their marriage issues. He is the most loyal. Despite her remarrying the day of their divorce he never even looked at another woman and kept his wedding ring with him at all times.

[confusedwhynot]

I totally agree! I wish my husband had kept the promise he made to me when we were first married. He promised to date me regularly and he never did keep that promise. We are now separated after 30 years. I wanted us to spend more time together. Also there is so much more to dating/marriage than the act of sex. My husband's view of marriage was: Go to work for 10-12 hours, come home eat, have sex. That is not what I would call building a relationship. He also doesn't have a relationship with any of his children as their father. It is deeply troubling in my heart to know he could form a bond with our children. Even more so that he could build an intimate relationship with me. Compassion and a desire to face hard times is also important in a marriage. Life is not easy and our mortal bodies can and will struggle. Love for your spouse has to go much deeper than the physical act of sex.

[AmandaJYoungs]

This is the most healing thing I could have heard in respect of the most important romantic and intimate relationship in my life, that I chose to leave 20 years ago. (Yes, it still needed some healing, even after all that time.) I feel like what I was trying to do has been validated, however badly I might have done it, and I'm really grateful for that. Maybe if there is a next time round it will be different and better. 🙂

[kantraxoikol]

i really love how he talks to people, instead of lecturing them or telling them. he relates this all as if it happens to him, and of course, it does.

[ArtByHazel]

What a wise and solid advice.

Open communication is necessary and building intimacy is essential for a healthy relationship.

[Noworriesjustdreams]

Despite everything, bottom line, he loves her, always has, you always hear it in his voice and sees it in his eyes, he even crosses his legs pointing toward her. Lucky girl.