RESPECT means DIFFERENT things to MEN and WOMEN, or: where have all the real men gone?

Buy my book, "The Value of Others"

A common complaint that I hear from women in the dating market is that men don't seem to know what to do with them. They don't take initiative; they don't confidently lead the relationship; they don't know where to "put their hands" (both figuratively and literally). Where have all the real men gone? After giving it some thought, I realized that these issues may have an unlikely culprit: the concept of respect. Respect might mean different things to men than it does to women, and these differences might be impacting the dating game in ways we haven't yet fully appreciated as a culture. In this episode, I will discuss three of these potential differences.

Orion is a licensed psychologist in the state of California.
Podcast available of Spotify, Instagram, Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts and others.
See the "About" tab for more information on donations and consultations.

#respect #dating #relationship

[Moss_XO]

“ oh yeah you respected the shit outta me “ 😂😂😂

[Britton_Thompson]

Dead on the money. I was always told to "respect women" growing up, and I always assumed it meant *never pursue sex.* That the most attractive man will always be the one who let's the female make that decision. All the boys in my generation were having this drilled into us beginning in our youth

[kylecurryyt]

Very clear explanation of the issue of “respect” for women. As a young man (teenager) I thought being respectful meant making it very clear that I valued my girlfriend as a person and not just as a sex object. I expressed this by holding back on sexual pressure and letting the girl decide when to make the next move.

Well guess what?

Most girls did not find that attractive at all. They did desire consideration, as you mentioned, but they did not want to be “respected.” They wanted to be pursued, taken and ravished. Or at least they wanted me to attempt that. Some of them had religious values that prevented them from having premarital sex, but they at least wanted me to try to seduce them, even if they had to say no on religious grounds. Respectful behavior was a big turn off for most women I dated. I think when they felt too “respected” they didn’t feel desired.

[jwbrooks]

As I once heard: “if you treat her like a queen, she will treat you like a subject.”

[keywestfan]

“ Where are all the men that know how to treat a woman?”

In the Friendzone, right where you put them

[melodymac]

I feel like women want men to fulfill a traditional male role that has largely remained unchanged at the same time that women, in a pretty much completely new paradigm, want to be treated in both a traditional and contemporary/ more modern manner. I can see the disconnect and confusion there.

[idlehourlinda]

I like this way of differentiating between respect and consideration. You can't force someone to respect you, but you can refuse to be disrespected.

[Cantbuyathrill]

"You respected the shit out of me last night!" 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

[interestingtimes]

It's also called nice guy syndrome. See "No More Mr. Nice Guy" by Robert Glover. I think it goes much deeper than a simple misunderstanding. It's a complex issue involving lowering testosterone rates in men, men being raised by single mothers, men raised by feminists, men raised by women who despise their son's father and mothers who form a romantic bond with their sons.

[Onlooker]

As an older man, I can completely validate his second point. You can’t be respected if you always defer to her whims. You need to set the agenda, take the initiative, pick the restaurant, make date plans, etc…The best way I’ve heard this described recently is, “You can do anything to a woman except bore her.” If you always defer to her whims - thinking you’re showing her respect - you’re really appearing weak and boring.

[ARdave]

Man this was amazing, the topic of disrespect vs respect for sexual charisma blew my mind and just answered so many questions. I am 31 and never heard this idea anywhere.

I worked with a guy who was 5’4 his hairline was receding very bad and he only had a few teeth in his head. He was not conventionally good looking at all but he had sex with a ton of beautiful woman in our age bracket and it just blew my mind. I could not understand what he had that I did not have that made him so great with woman to have sex with him. This explains it. This guy was edgy and somtimes just down right disrespectful to woman. I was the text book nice guy that never said anything to “stir the pot” avoided conflict and would break my back for people, in other words zero sexual charisma.

Man I still can’t believe this info, wish I knew it years ago. It issue now is, how do I change a life time of nice guy tendency’s that are so hard wired?

[carlosdixan]

We realize that is not worth it. Men have to do and bring a lot of things to a relationship. But when you ask females what are they offering you they normally get upset and deflect

[dereksteneman]

My wife is brutally honest here. She wants/needs me to pursue and ravish her. She wants to “resist” while I pursue. When she “resists” I was taught to stop pursuing out of respect. Not the way it works! Again… spot on! Very helpful…keep it coming.

[Dustinplayskeeps]

This is 8 minutes of pure gold and wisdom. The way you explained that the masculine understanding and expression of respect is to defer and submit to the authority of the one we respect, which is the opposite of what women want from us, literally choked me up and explains the miscommunication my wife and i have been having lately. Thank you.

[wizardadmin]

"where are all the man who know how to treat a woman?" is a question those women ask who don't know how to treat a man 🤣

[robbytheartist]

Man let me tell you. You have some really high end quality content that is always on point. I have applied much of it to my life and have made great strides. Thank you so much!

[psychacks]

A common complaint that I hear from women in the dating market is that men don't seem to know what to do with them. They don't take initiative; they don't confidently lead the relationship; they don't know where to "put their hands" (both figuratively and literally). Where have all the real men gone? After giving it some thought, I realized that these issues may have an unlikely culprit: the concept of respect. Respect might mean different things to men than it does to women, and these differences might be impacting the dating game in ways we haven't yet fully appreciated as a culture. In this episode, I will discuss three of these potential differences.

Orion is a licensed psychologist in the state of California.
Podcast available of Spotify, Instagram, Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts and others.
See the "About" tab for more information on donations and consultations.

[UnityFromDiversity]

Politics is downstream from culture.
Whoever controls the past controls the future.
Whoever controls the present controls the past.
He who controls the politic controls the present.
Whoever controls the culture controls the politic(politics=downstream from culture)
Whoever controls the pussy controls the culture.

Blue Pill- The belief that both genders, possessing equal natures, will on average possess equal proclivities to be moral & responsible given equal qualities & quantities of invested nurture.

Red Pill- The awareness that men & women, having different natures, will on average possess different proclivities to be moral & responsible given equal qualities & quantities of invested nurture, & how this effects societies, micro & macro.

Masculine republics give way to feminine democracies, and feminine democracies give way to tyranny. -Aristotle

The micro cycle(80 years):
Hard times create strong men
Strong men create good times
Good times create baby boomers
Baby boomers create hard times...

The macro cycle(800-1200 years):
Hard times create patriarchy(where rights are dependent on responsibilities, since men usually take more responsibilities than women this system is described as patriarchy)
Patriarchy creates good times
Good times creates feminism(equal rights independent of responsibilities)
Feminism burns everything down, creating hard times...

To Adam God said, "Because YOU LISTENED TO YOUR WIFE & ate from the tree about which I commanded you not to:
Cursed is the ground because of you, through painful toil you will eat of it, all the days of your life."
-Genesis 3:17

Man's hiearchy of needs:
1 Safety
2 Food & Water
3 Shelter & Sleep
4 Social & Sexual needs
5 Communal & self esteem needs
6 Self Actualization

In every category of need in men's hierarchy, women's needs are met better in society, yet every election women vote to take more from men and give more to themselves?!

Women's hiearchy of needs:
1 Equality of Opportunity
2 Equality of Outcome
3 Equality of Authority
4 Equal Authority with no Responsibility
5 All the Authority with no Responsibility for the women, with all the Responsibilities & no Authority for the man or men(especially sexual Responsibilities & Authorities).

A tyrant has 100% authority with 0% responsibility.
A slave has 100% responsibility with 0% authority.
Today marriage, as redefined by the female democratic majority and family court system, makes the man a slave to a tyrant wife, who can divorce him at will, stealing his children, his wealth, and his human dignity.

All womens natural unregulated desire is to have sex with high status bad bad boys and get innocent men to pay for the responsibility consequences(abortions, kids ect.). That's why women, no matter how meritocratic, should never vote.

Women want equal rights authority to make all the decisions in their own life when the alpha f*cks opportunity is there. Its when responsibility slowly comes knocking that women want to shift responsibility back over to innocent men. Women want to sit at the poker table of the socio-sexual market place & make bets & authorize promises in the hundreds of thousands in reproductive costs when they can only actually back up a few pennies worth of responsibility. If women CAN'T take responsibility for a authorization, then they CAN'T have equal authority/rights as the guy who can.

Show me a man who takes by force what he wants from women and I'll show you 100 women who vote to take by force what they want from men. Show me a grave created by patriarchy and Ill show you an entire graveyard created by feminism/communism.

"Any society that negates the role of the father in the voluntarily marriage contract from decent civilization building men and replaces it with a involuntary centralized welfare state will not remain civilized for long."

[mortalkomment]

Woman: Where are all the good men?

Sun Tsu: They're likely in your friendzone or in a marriage with the good women.

[xristinarose]

The Bible sais men should LOVE their wife while the woman should RESPECT her husband.