13 Harsh Truths I Know at 38 But Wish I Knew at 20

I turned 38 this year. These are all the things I wish I could tell my 20 year old self. If you are in your 20s, 30s or even beyond, watch this and learn from some of my life lessons that I wish I knew.

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Timestamps:
00:00 Intro
00:31 Not everyone will like you
01:08 Don't waste life on regret
01:41 Life is unfair
02:45 You won't know what you want to be
03:43 No shortcuts to success
05:39 Work-life balance is a myth
06:46 Everything is a result of compounding
07:34 Money doesn't buy happiness
08:06 Don't delay your gratification
08:56 True friends are rare
09:41 Be mindful of what you put in your body and mind
10:28 Don't let your phone take away your life
11:30 Ignore society's expectations for your life

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[lauriexwang]

Let me know, which life lesson do you wish to tell your younger self?

[bmoshareholderappleshareho]

I learned a lot of lessons in life. I will share two of them right now. 1) when you desperately need help, nobody wants to help you. When you don’t require any help at all, that’s when people want to help you. 2) I don’t believe in love. I believe that all relationships are simply personal investments. Relationships are not charities. They are investments.

[pincopallino]

Someone told me once, your 30s are the best period of your life. Nope. I think it's your 40s. In your 20s you have to think about education, a job, money, you have to figure everything out, you must find your place, your direction. In your 30s you must establish those things, also in your private life, you know the direction, but you have to build a lot. In your 40s, you're finally done with finding out and have made peace with where you are. So you can enjoy life.

[MarcusAurelius]

The privilege of a lifetime is to become who you truly are.

~ Carl Gustav Jung (1875 - 1961)

[tennilledebysingh]

1. Life IS fair..Fair is just a label people apply meaning to.
2. I don't have unattainable goals or even "passions". I have interests I cultivate.
3. I don't compare myself to others, I compare myself to...me.
4. Balance is the key to my life.

[Nellia.x]

Life is unfair but it’s what you make of it.

[brittanyb]

I turned 38 this year. I had my first and only child at 20. He will be graduating soon and I have no idea what I’m going to do with my life. I was a single parent and sent my 20s and most of my 30s devoting my entire life to being a mom and just trying to survive. A big part of me is excited and scared about the future all at the same time.

[studynoook]

Time is truly a blessing. I have suffered from depression as a kid until my young adult years. Now I am 26, and I can say that at 25, I learned that every day has it's own worries, so focus on the present day and do it to excellence according to the abilities that God has blessed you with. Gratitude, even for the little things such as a cup of water, getting enough sleep, having a job, or being able to have support, will look for a new job. Having friends or a community you can turn to are all things to find gratitude in every day. Lastly, I found God at 23 in the middle of the pandemic, and that has been such a pivotal moment, especially for my mental health. I loved the points that you made!

[oldfriend]

I just turned 50 a couple of days ago, never married, no kids. All the difficulties described in this video are at minimum triple the difficulty for men and not trying to belittle anybody either. The entire dating, social media and dating apps, marriage, having kids, divorce world is severely lopsided in favor of one side. I thank God almost every day for never having allowed me to give into any of my ex's demands to get married or have kids for exactly the same things discussed in this video. The cost of living and life in Los Angeles and the San Fernando Valley is a war in itself. Even rich people out here are downsizing and trimming expenses as fast as they can for so many reasons. If there is one thing I could share with the universe it would be this, don't move to Los Angeles to build your lives. Please God let me save you whoever is out there reading this.

[amonzart]

The rarity of true friendships is so accurate. Many people usually lost themselves trying to be most likable possible thinking they are gaining true friends. It does not mean u can be nice and polite to other person but most people will not appreciate you the way we always expect.

[xdgsz]

I’m 45 years old and the things I learned most is that don’t live life trying to please everyone at the expense of your happiness….focus on yourself first

[ThrowBackZone]

I think 'Work-life balance is a myth' is the harsh truth I needed to hear. Time to focus on what truly matters! 💪

[immrtuspap]

The thing i really admire in people is when they can accept someone enturely and unconditionally for who they are, which means that they see the impossible task of changing the image of someone to fit their views and standards, so i think thats a harsh truth that makes your life so much smoother and happier.

[snowdude]

Thinking leads to more thinking and action leads to clarity

[chamberlain]

Your point about money buying freedom of choice is absolutely goddamn right. This hits hard as you age, especially. One can have a lot of fun times being a broke young person, but life is hollow if you are a broke adult. It just is.

If you have wealth though, you are free to live as you please. I know a rich man personally who has worked multiple careers and lived in multiple cities, dropping everything to start over elsewhere as he saw fit, all because he had enough wealth to allow him to. It is a marvelous luxury to be so free. To say that I am envious would be an understatement.

[aishajimoh]

I just turned 36 yo last month and this is one of the best birthday gifts😊

[erik]

I turn 39 in a month, the hardest one for me to get my head around is the life is unfair, not so much that is unfair, but how it became unfair. I always say, the only fair in life has pigs and pie eating contest. I've always question the nature of life, I find my 30s have been the time of my life where I look at philosophies or ways of live to pathed my own way of living. My main desire has always been true freedom, but that's beginning to shift to finding a way to obtain true freedom for my little one. She hit all the good points that is worth learning. Good video.

[susans]

#2 I wish I had learned this earlier. Now I find the lesson in the thing I regret. Instead of dwelling on regret, I focus on applying the lesson on future events. That has been a big help.

[Justauri-asdfghjkl]

I really like the dont delay gratification one - especially now that I am 25 and really want to enjoy my youth

[Farah-Choudhury]

Hi Laurie, new subscriber here. I love the deep knowledge in this video! I feel like I got a masterclass in just under 15 minutes. Thank you!

My lesson: We are all going to experience some sort of childhood events that are not ideal (trauma, unfairness, outdated tribal thinking, bullying, financial constraints, non-ideal environments, etc.). I've certainly had my share of generous helpings of them. Its easy to hold on to grudges, or bitterness due to them. But I started to feel more joy in life when I started to forgive all of those people and events. And here's the best part, I started to prosper in life, when I recognized the lessons of those events and started making changes in my life. So, in short, look at each unpleasant event as a great teacher in disguise, and then figure out what the hidden lesson is, even if it takes a long time to understand it. Forgive, understand, learn, grow, prosper.