17 Rants in 4 Minutes

In which Hank rants about seventeen different things that bug him. To be clear, this is not healthy and I kinda wish I hadn't done it because I was stressed out for the whole day after I filmed it. But, yeah, this stuff seriously annoys me. The rants are as follows:

1. American Cheese is not Cheese
2. 90% Fat Free means 10% Fat
3. Everything is Chemicals
4. All-Natural Does Not Mean "Good For You"
5. Public restroom toilet paper
6. WIPE UP YOUR PEE!
7. Uberfans...stop hating on enthusiastic noobs
8. USE YOUR TURN SIGNAL!
9. GIF can be pronounced either way
10. SLOW KETCHUP
11. KETCHUP PEE
12. Having to sneeze but not sneezing
13. Tangled headphone cables
14. Headphone chord in the chair wheel
15. "Gay" as an insult
16. Complaining about complaining because we have it so good.
17. "Have you scanned your club card."

[papaya]

"You passive aggressive robot sack of ketchup pee!
GAH!"
Best Hank Green quote ever.

[coena]

I agree that “gay” is an extremely lame and immature insult. Instead, I like to use “passive aggressive robot sack of ketchup pee”.

[yokab]

Man, we need more of Hank ranting on stuff.

[Lyw]

I've watched 3:37 7 times already and the "GAH" at the end just keeps getting funnier

[rachelferguson]

'You passive aggressive robot sack of ketchup pee! GAH!' *laughs* Get's me every time! :D

[aireannawachal]

number seven is my favorite. just because I don't know every single little tiny thing of that mean I "don't deserve to even know about it" or I" am not really a fan at all. just a wannabe"

[Pile_of_carbon]

If I tried to talk as fast as Hank I'd probably faint because I wouldn't have time to breathe. How the hell does he do that? xD

[EiferBrennan]

I die laughing every time Hank calls the "U-Scan" a "Passive Aggressive Robot Sack of Ketchup Pee!".

[jasminewang]

"ye passive aggressive robot sack of ketchup pee"
Shakespearean insult of the century

[gracehopps]

Passive
Aggressive
Robot
Sack
Of
Ketchup
Pee

Iconic.
If you make this into a t-shirt I will buy 3 of them over the course of my lifetime.

[issy]

thank you for introducing us all to the phrase 'diabolical turd face'. That's amazing.

[pantopia]

Is there a way to down load "PASSIVE AGGRESSIVE ROBOT SACK OF KETCHUP PEE ... GAH". ?

[heyysimone]

I LOVE the part about not knowing every single detail of something youre a fan of. Everyone starts out not knowing, it doesnt make them less of a fan. And some people also dont have memories as good as others. I can quote the entire film Juno, it doesnt mean that i like it more than my sister does though.

[irellyvant]

i have watched this so many times and somehow hank being unbelievably frustrated and angry brings me so much joy

[PaulLaPorteJr]

...Just shake up the squeezable ketchup bottle, man.

[jangwoo]

I love it when Hank goes insane in 3:32

[Awesomeness]

Oh my god this is the hardest I've laughed in months.
*EVERYTHING IS CHEMICALS!!*

[deathsheir]

Actually, it is a good idea to let out your anger every once in a while. Short term, versus long term effects. The short term of letting out your anger, is you get angrier, however, the long term, you feel better. Where not letting out anger, short term, you seem like a nice happier person, but the long term you'll just become an angry person with uncontrollable spouts of rage.

[mikedavey]

Eating a tub of lard while watching a Firefly marathon. That's probably a thing.

[Datalore]

1:30 I have had "IT'S YOUR PEE AND SOMEONE IS GONNA HAVE TO CLEAN IT UP" play in my head literally EVERY time I've used the bathroom for the last 6 years

So thanks, Hank. The toilet seat is always cleaner after I use it thanks to you.