5 Things You Can't Change in Any Man | Adam LoDolce

Are you trying to change him? Don't waste your time with these 5 things...

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Many of the biggest frustrations you will ever experience in a relationship come from trying to change certain things about the man you’re with.

I’m not talking about little things like forgetting to put the toilet seat down either…

Some things you just have to accept.

And if you can’t accept them…

… it maybe time to pull the plug on the relationship.

It doesn’t matter how many psychology books you read, there are some behaviors that are immune to a Pavlovian response.

When you accept certain things as being static in your relationship, it will provide clarity around how to proceed.

Keep your eyes open, because some of these are HUGE red flags and deal breakers for a lot of women.

Your Coach,
Adam

P.S. One thing you should never accept is a causal relationship when you’re looking for commitment.

Summary –

1. The wondering eye.

A study by Denver University found that if someone cheats once, then it is three times more likely that they will cheat again as compared to someone who has never cheated. Cheat on me once; shame on you… cheat on me twice; shame on me.

2. His temperament.

Maybe you’re with a guy who is super anxious… or maybe he’s lazy, or a bit loud. These are the types of things that you can’t change in a person. If you don’t enjoy these things about him, then stop trying to change them. Move on and find someone new.

3. His abusive or controlling nature.

If he’s emotionally or physically abusive you need to leave now! He can’t change. He may try, but the risk is too great.

Move on before it leads to emotional damage or even physical damage. You need to leave and if you need help then go to The National Domestic Violence Hotline. They are going to help you get out of the relationship and find a healthy place for yourself.

4. His thoughts on marriage and children.

Unfortunately if he doesn’t want to have kids and you do, then you’re just not compatible. Don’t waste your time trying to change a man who has different values. Have the courage and discipline to move on and find a man that fits your lifestyle and goals.

5. His family and upbringing.

Are you dating a mama’s boy? Does his sister drive you crazy? Your man’s family is not something you can choose. At the end of the day, you need to accept them.

Although the past five points are not things that you can change in a man, I do think it’s possible to change other things. But to do this he must be open minded to improvement. A woman can’t change a man because she loves him, but a man can change himself because he loves her.

[talesofadanishcottage]

I were in a relationship with a really controlling and psychologically abusive man. I thought that what I had were the best that I could get. I then saw your videos and it changed everything!
I broke up with him but he wouldn't leave me alone and wouldn't accept it. He started harassing me and first after 3 months I was finally free from him.
Still hope there's someone better for me out there. Your videos helped me a lot through a hard time. Thank you❤️

[littlefroe]

A lot of people overlook family upbringing; honestly if his mother is not on your side it's a bleak looking future

[veganvintagegeek]

Adam's teaching the truth here do not discount Adam's advice it will help with getting rid of the jerks, too.

[Em-puhp]

I’ve cheated in past relationships. I was a teenager. Im in a relationship now where I’ve never even talked to another man that my boyfriend didn’t know about. I know I would NEVER cheat again. Never.

[fojanhadjiabbasi]

A man can change himself because he loves her is a very true statement!

[hakunamatata]

If you need a "fixer-upper", buy a house. Or a car. Don't invest like that in a guy. It is a lot easier to rebuild a house. And after all that work, the house is still yours to keep or sell.

[labinit]

I have been in relationship where I tried to change my was 41 and I was was a cheater, and I thought maybe im not enough....but now I clearly know that I was wrong....girls u r always more than enough....just never ever waste ur time with the wrong man.

[Dlovely]

I am 40+ and have learned so much about this. Like you said he could change for her if he wanted. That's a good thing for a woman to inspire him. Inspire, be you and communicate with him. But yes you must accept a person for who they are. I learned him because I love him. Didn't settle, but I listened and you begin to understand what you can do and can't. One person who you CAN change is yourself and how you think. Blessings.

[rosalindscotton]

I needed this video when I was 20 years old. I had to learn this information the hard way. Everything you said in this video is 100% right. I hope more women understand this information about men more than anything else. 😊

[noctislucis]

The crucial point is picking the partner. When you pick the partner you're taking him/her with all his/her strengths and weaknesses or what you think are his/hers strengths and weakness, if you are incompatible with one another there's no reason either one is staying.
To think you are staying to change him/her is the biggest mistake you'll ever make and you'll realize why eventually.

[duneece]

I tried to improve the communication within my marriage but my partner wasn't open to learning how to improve as a couple. Helpful video! Thanks for sharing.

[diamondunicorn]

the wig scenes have me dying laughing all the time! 😅😅😅😅😅

[srslychristy]

very helpful! it's an awesome feeling knowing you're in a healthy relationship because both my boyfriend and I are open to change & yes there are some things we cannot change about one another because that is what makes us, us! I love how you added the other information at the end. I recently told my boyfriend of a year that I love it when he compliments me or shows more affection because he doesn't as often as I do to him, and guess what! he started to do it more, so you're completely right. thanks for the great videos!

[MeMe-odmg]

3 is very important. I was in abusive relationship. That person did NOT and will NOT change so don't stick around.

[cakekyo]

Adam your videos are so short!!!! I love and enjoy them so much that i dont realize when they end.... thank you so much!

[shaylagoogle]

Your the Brother, every woman should have had! 😊 You have the most entertaining and informative videos!

[lunallena]

Adam, I think that you should add to the list that you can't change his: friends, job, level of education and hobbies, food and fitness lifestyle unless he is super motivated. Telling a guy to be more ambitious at his job and all of the above when you are trying to do that yourself & when just dating, ends the interaction.

[luulips]

Thank you for this because I was wondering if it is worth it to still be involved with my ex who has poor communication skills. I communicate how I feel about certain things and he just says "ok" but doesn't give me more feedback. And I found out in other ways how he's felt about me (strong feelings) which left me in more shock because he won't talk to me about it and tends to barely even show me. I'm doing no contact now because it's gotten so frustrating that I have to pull away before I show up angry and I know that won't help. I have to think about if I want to move forward or move on.

[anatriana]

You are brilliant. I love the way you explain things. Love you and James:)

[luulips]

Well I recently communicated that I need him to be more direct when letting me know what he's asking of me. I even gave an example. He tends to beat around the bush when he wants something and I miss the whole point. I tend to speak more directly. I just realized this when he was dropping me off from church Sunday. I didn't figure out what he was asking until the next day hahaha! We'll see if he has it in him to try to communicate better. I'll know within the next few weeks if he catches on or feels he can do it or wants to I suppose.