kumiko » you'll get over it (vent)

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Okay, there is going to be quite a personal huge ass emotional text, read it at your own will..

Soo, I've been having some quite shitty days lately. I had a mental breakdown the other day when I posted the suga vent video, but I managed to get back on my feet within the next days. However, shit continued to happen because guess what I stopped taking my medications for like 10 days because I"m travelling and would always forget to take it.

So something I was not expecting to happen happened yesterday. I had a panic attack and I even tho I usually get like a huge amount of anxiety because of the simple things I have never had a panic attack before so I wasn't even aware it was happening when it started. I was literally just tweeting about shitty I was feeling and I suddenly started to get more emotional about it and started shaking and when I realized I was crying and on the bathroom floor trying to contact my friend for help. After freaking out for a while I started writing on my notebook how I was feeling what I was thinking etc because my friend told me it would help to write. So after 30 minutes and 4 pages written I managed to calm down.

This morning I woke up feeling like shit again and I couldn't get out of bed or the room until the middle of afternoon. I'm way better than in the morning but still feeling quite crappy.

I started editing frequently in 2015 which was the worst year of my life because my depression was in the lowest point ever. And fmvs were what actuall kept me going and when I finally started editing it was my coping mechanism to deal with these feelings because if I don't write how I'm feeling like now or edit something related I can't get it out of my system.

So yea, idk I felt like telling you all this for some reason because other ppl might relate to this as well. And this song has such a beautiful meaning I wanted to use it and try to remember that things will pass and you'll be okay. You'll get over it.

Hope you're all having a great day~
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Fandom: Hibike Euphonium - Oumae Kumiko
Song: Landslide
Artist: Oh Wonder
Coloring: annet
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If you like & want to support the content I make you can do it by buying me a coffee on ko-fi ♥

[Malethicent]

2015 was one of my worst years too :c Hope you'll feel better soon!! Eat well, sleep well, and think of happier thoughts. Have a great day! :-)

[tanGinko]

I hope things will better with you. My life is horible too so I might understand a bit about yours. Keep making fmvs because they're beautiful

[Makibela]

QUE COISA MAIS LINDA E TRISTE e meu coração doeu tanto com teu texto... Eu realmente espero que tu teja melhor pfvr volta logo eu não aguento mais ficar sem tu por aqui ):

[xAlternateUniverse]

thank you for sharing this ❤ i can relate; last year was probably my lowest year, and I don't think i can tell you how many times i'd end up locked in my bathroom crying. what sucked the most was that i started losing interest in a lot of the things i usually loved doing, like editing and writing - everything i did felt forced. i'd never felt more useless in my life.

i don't know what changed, but i fell in love with editing again and it helps me cope with a lot - it's like an emotional release and a distraction at the same time. i'm glad that it can help you in this way, too ❤ i hope that you feel better - good days are coming, even if you don't feel like they are. stay strong, okay? ❤

and this edit is beautiful ❤ thank you again for sharing ❤

[totallynoticarus]

I truly hope you will feel better soon. Just remember to take your medication and ask someone for help if you need. Take enough breaks and don't overdo yourself. Have some space to breathe. You can always dm me if you want to talk. <3

[RandomFangirlx]

this is so pretty<3 i hope u feel better soon aww :c

[shadamyforever]

im really sorry you have been having such a hard time T^T! Your editing is so beautiful and you're also amazing c':!
i hope you're eating well and sleeping alright also just try and write your thoughts down like your friend suggested and if not im always open if you need someone else to talk to ^^! Stay strong <3