Not like that! #patriarchy #feminism #toxicmasculinity

[cousinjake]

Imagine a masculinity so frail and precious it can't hear who's harming it without it breaking. Thanks for the content Internet Dad

[BiratesoftheCaribbean]

It's crazy to think that MOST stuff that harms men comed from patriarchal society. Lack of healthcare, lack of help in cases of abuse, lack of abilities to express themselves and their emotions...

[MrTheta]

They made masculinity so hard and strong it became brittle. Now you can break it by accident. Le oops

[Pensnmusic]

Patriarchy has us out here like:

"I don't feel emotions so STOP SAYING THAT I DO!"

[justme-qdqb]

It's crazy, I've actually been in discussions with men who where complaining about things caused by partiarchy, but then somehow still framed it in a way that blamed women for it and therefor we shouldn't have rights

[gstheprotector]

“You have to defend men by saying how women are sirens and succubi and how men are abused in the progressive society so we can force all of society to make men dominant again to where women can’t talk back again! 😢” I think that’s how those guys want you to “defend” men, by blaming outside forces that have little to do with it and not the patriarchy 🙄

(To clarify my point, the people that say “defend men MY way” aren’t people I’m rooting for)

[RadishTheFool]

On a related note: I saw so many reddit posts complaining about how international men's day was being ignored. I thought that was so telling.

Many of these posters seemed to somehow expect celebration and discussion to just happen. Instead of, you know, organizing it themselves. Or at least figuring out what others have put together, and sharing that information. Or lifting each other up with compliments, resources, understanding, empathy.

Now I do believe that international men's day did not get the same attention from media and companies as international women's day, and it's important to point that out and open up conversations about the causes and effects. And I'm sure those conversations do happen. But so many men seem to feel sidelined because it didn't just happen to them.

Disappointed men: international men's day is not like father's day where you get to kick back and let others throw you a parade. It's a day for bringing up your issues, your ideas, your hopes, for organising outreach, for communication, for love, for community, for celebrating yourself and the other positive men in your life.

It's as if many (cis, white) men are so used to being catered to that it doesn't occur to them that they themselves can initiate, celebrate, and contribute to positive change. For everyone.

[yzztwfk]

The amount of people who didn’t understand what he said-

[OatmealTheCrazy]

"This doesn't let me use of men's issues as an excuse to hate women"

[obothehobo]

Honestly wish more people would talk about how the patriarchy and toxic masculinity harm men. Obv it makes sense that how it harms women is the center of attention as it harms women a fair bit more but it hurts a lot of men too, especially with the whole toxic masculine culture of it not being manly to show emotion and that if you're sad or lonely or depressed you should just man up, and you especially shouldn't share those feelings with others. I think that's probably the biggest reason the suicide rate is so high for men.

[dinahmyte]

I got literal death threats during men's mental health awareness for saying more men need to be emotional with their friends so they can detach romance from kindness. 🤷🏽‍♀️ Like so many women want to be nice and kind to men without men assuming it's romantic or sexual and that starts with destigmatizing emotional support between men.

Hug your male friends. Tell them you love them. Check up on them. Because women don't like doing that because you take it as romantic or sexual and that makes women uncomfortable. 🤷🏽‍♀️

I had a male friend who KNEW I WAS GAY and still thought me saying his thesis statement was cool was me hitting on him... patriarchy kills more men than anything...

[thefloorist]

It's because they think that the patriarchy is a non existent thing that women use to blame THEM for women's problems.
They also don't understand that a patriarchy is a societal issue and not a man issue.

[rhov-anion]

It's honestly amusing to see how fragile are the men who try the hardest to act tough.

[beastshawnee]

right? LOL! They never want to hear it. I gave a speech in speech class (1980) about how gender roles hurt people both men and women…and at the end of class there was a discussion and …this guy exploded on me and the professor who tried to calm him and defend me…He wound up actually threatening the professor’s life-she kicked him out and we both got security to escort us off campus.- he got expelled from the university immediately! 🤷🏻‍♀️💥👮🏻‍♂️

[zaynab-to-a]

the worst part about discussing how the partiarchy (whether that word is used or not) hurts men is the biggest reason why I almost never see it discussed. Often whenever men enter (or start) the conversation, it ALMOST ALWAYS becomes a conversation about how men have it so much harder than women and women's problems are either inconsequential or imaginary, and also women suck, which sucks because the problems men face are very important to talk about, yet unless explicitly stated otherwise, the conversation always seems to happen at the expense of women.
The fact that they so often miss the point in this manner is imo why the discussion seems to always stop short of any kind of solution.

[bethmoore]

I watched my three younger brothers grow up in Texas and Arkansas, in the 50s & 60s. Both our parents thought it was important for all four of us to be tough, and stoic. That’s why they took us to see a wrecked car. My father had an insurance agency, and he had to look at it, anyway, to assess the damage. It was like a field trip with the Addams family.

They were also pressured, mocked, and ridiculed for not playing football. The only cos brother, the youngest, played football until he messed up his knee, which was not long.

The way they were treated in PE was barbaric and often cruel, and boys usually got beaten more than girls.

The patriarchy does suck for men.

[treyatkinson]

You know, many "manly men" that these guys look up to (Lincoln, Theodore Roosevelt, etc) prided themselves in being open-minded and willing to listen to others thoughts. My own father is a great role model. He loves his kids and grandchildren, talks to us on a regular basis, and is willing to discuss things that might make him a bit uncomfortable to better understand the opposing view.
Be better, bros. You're manliness isn't in jeopardy because you asked a thoughtful question, or listened to someone else's thoughts and opinions.

[seannarajbansi]

Literally just saw a video about how wives need to be quiet. When a women commented on that video about a bad experience with her ex who always had to be right and she couldn’t always be quiet, all the men in the comments hated on her and told her that she deserved that if she was speaking out of turn. Point is, we need some men on our side who will stand up for us too because there are so many out there who want to put us down.

[princessaur]

It's great being conventionally attractive because men will just emptly nod their head while I talk about feminism as if they actually care about what I'm saying lmao. I know if I was 10 lbs heavier or had colored hair though they'd start screeching. 😂

[ninaschust]

You constantly do that, but they are too brainwashed to understand. It harms all of us. Trevor Noah about men & sex and the need for being emotionally connected.