The Worst Tank You Never Heard Of

There are many arguments about the "Best tank ever". There are only slightly fewer about the "worst", mostly covering obscure prototypes which justifiably never entered mass production.

However, we have here a tank which was produced in the triple digits, and in which nothing works right. The tracks, the wheels, the guns, the armor, the steering, the brakes, the engines, the vision, the radio... no, wait, there is no radio... the controls, the headlights.... basically nothing meets requirements.

And yet, it seems almost unknown. Probably because it was so bad that nobody seemed particularly desperate enough to use it.

Edit: I mistakenly say "Crusader" at the end vice "Covenantor"

Post-COVID-Travel-and-Scout Car Fund:

[yetanother]

"It was also not possible to order a new faceplate without ordering an entirely new bogie assembly."
*Apple:* "Write that down!"

[gravity]

"Oh thank god the tank is on fire"

[ThePinkus]

"... and we will conclude our report with a note to the builder: when we said that the best way to kill a tank is using a tank, we didn't mean using and killing the same tank. It was intended to be different tanks. Please review Your design to accommodate this distinction."

[donjones]

This tank has a superior level of protection - of the headlights.
Company brochure: *Our tank has a superior level of protection, according to U.S. Army testing.*

[jonskowitz]

How is this thing six tons heavier, more poorly protected, and more cramped than M3 stuart?! Not to mention a main gun that only operated correctly ONCE. Tanks, but no tanks

[leops]

Quick, someone export these to Elbonia.

[SedatedandRestrained]

I love that the Maus is the smallest AFV on the desk!

[voodoogroove]

Some of these tanks were deployed to Aleutian Islands in Alaska to contend with Japanese forces. They were awful, but the only armor spared to fight in the Alaskan Campaign. One of them sank in a swamp on one of the islands, lost. I wonder...is it still there, intact, awaiting a determined person to come dig it out?

[klassenhero]

"The gun needs a special Kit of tools" yeah that Kit Is called a Trashcan

[deanokken]

As a Dutchman, I'm really disheartened... Because this is the only """modern""" WW2 tank we had at the time...

[warmstrong]

Sounds like WoT just found their new tier 3 premium.

[alessiobubbles]

DESIGNER 1: So we basically have a tank with obsolete armor, a useless headlight, an engine impossible to access and repair, with a cramped interior, the steering levers are pain-inducing, the tracks fall off, it's vulnerable to a cold environment and we might need superstrong glue to keep it intact, what shall we do sir?
DESIGNER 2: Build another one with more guns!

[TheAcdcninja]

“First and second gear were so far apart that the vehicle would stop before being physically able to shift into second” has to be one of the biggest engineering facepalms of all time

[Zajuts]

Mrs. Chieftain: "I've been invited to a virtual gender reveal party. Do you want to join in?"

Chieftain(thinking fast): "Sorry, I have to make a video about a very important tank project that I promised my viewers. I would have loved to come, but bills must be paid."

[jakobc.]

"Battery had to be replaced at 400 miles, magneto had to be replaced at 402 miles."
That is so funny. Its litteraly them repairing the tank, driving 2 miles only for the thing to break again.

[HSMiyamoto]

Fun Fact: The report has a hand-written annotation that reads as follows: "Get Rid of this Tank! It's an Endless Money-Pit! BUY JAPANESE! -- Kilmer"

[KaptenN]

The tank may be terrible at being a tank, but at least it's kinda cute.

[OtterTreySSArmy]

My God listening to its mechanical problems makes the late war German heavies look like Sherman's in terms of reliability

[Gillymonster]

This is literally like someone slapped a tank together, skipping the design and prototype phases altogether. You have to be talented to fail as hard and as completely as these schmucks.

[raphaelboily]

Marmon Herrington's boss: I need you to design a tank by the end of the week.
The engineer: But... it's 14h00 on a friday afternoon... are you sure...
Marmon Herrington's boss: DO IT!