What to expect at the end of life

Nurse Maria describes the common changes that you might notice in someone’s last weeks, days and hours of life. Peter, Shital and Tracey also talk about their personal experiences of looking after their loved ones during this time. If you’re caring for someone who is dying, you might find that there are some things you can relate to. But you might find that you don’t notice these changes or that you notice them at different times – everyone’s experience is different.

[margaretalbert]

I got in bed with my Mom on her last day and talked and just held her. She seemed very comfortable and was waiting to see my dad when she died in heaven. The nurses said they have never seen like it. They cried when they saw me hold my mom in bed in her last hours. She brought me into this world and I helped her to leave it peacefully.😥

[gybx]

The way my Mother died was horrible. It will haunt me for the rest of my life.
If you have parents, do everything you can to ensure they are treated with dignity as they die.

[Rita-ywtn]

I just recently lost my brother to cancer and it was so painful to watch him suffer he suffered so horribly . I know that this may sound crazy but it was harder watching him suffer than it was to lose him and there was absolutely nothing that I could do to help him other than just to be there for him and I thank God that he let me have as much time with him as I had I just miss him so much . 😞

[donnamilano]

I lost my Mom last week to I guess old age 89yrs. I miss you mom I have terminal cancer and hope to reunite with her in heaven,

[pattibrydon]

My mom passed away from very fast aggressive brain cancer. The hospice staff knew when it was getting close and that gave me an opportunity to call my Dad and brother so we were all with her. It was very peaceful. My father passed 2 years later. We found him at home beside his bed. It still breaks my heart when I think he died alone and scared. I miss them both so much.

[lorij]

The hardest experience you will go through.
Having your loved one pass at home is the greatest gift of love you can give.

[percyhawkins]

I have suffered terrible loss and grief and the most important thing I can tell anybody about it is this: Hug your loved ones and tell them you love them every chance you get because you never know if today is the last time you'll ever see them alive again.

[kensilva]

My father passed away 3 weeks ago. The doctors gave him a few months but he lived about a year longer so I was very very lucky to have him longer than what we were told. I miss him. Not only was he my father but he was my best friend.

[johnoakes]

I had what I think the best experience of my life when I cared for my late partner with terminal cancer in our home for six months till he passed in our bedroom. We spent many moments reminiscing over our several decades together and just sharing our love for each other. I would not have missed that for anything. RIP my darling man, wherever you are be assured I an with you even now 20yrs later.

[justicewillprevail]

I’m not sure if I will feel sad or feel excited when the time comes.... I pray everyone have a smooth transition when the time comes.

[Chatosvideos]

I had a good experience with my late hubby in the last hours before his death. He spoke little but he was restful. He spoke to me letting me know what was going on —- He spoke and said —- pray with me. We prayed the Lord’s Prayer and then my twin sister and I sang few church hymns he was familiar. Then he spoke again and said —-I’m slowing down. Then the lights started flickering on and off and then my hubby sighed and spoke —— Hi DAD —I imagine there was an embrace and a reunion with his late dad —- His dad may have been there to meet with him and then he took a deep breath once and then again and it was finished — He passed away. Watching this video made me remember him in his last hours prior to his death. I miss him so much. It will be his 5th death anniversary this November 14th. Surely, and know that he is in a better place now. He came in a dream giving me the biggest hug and with a bright smile on his face. I cannot forget that dream —the memory of it will be with me always.

[laurenmikles]

My granny passed away peacefully and free from pain even though it took 7 days for her to pass naturally. She took no pain medications as it wasn’t needed. She was 98 and so fortunate that she didn’t go through pain.

[JL-rlef]

My mom had stage 4 gastric cancer and spent the last 1.5 years of her life (much past the 6 months expected!) living with us in our home, well cared for. Her death was sudden, seriously, the 1.5 years she lived with us you'd never know she was ill. There were a few bouts of obvious health issues during that time, but they were very few and far between. Then suddenly after Easter, in 2017, she started spending a lot of time sleeping in her recliner, didn't want to go anywhere with us, didn't eat much. I'm an RN and it threw me for a loop....I haven't dealt with this before, not someone in the process of dying in my home, my own mother. She asked me to give her a bed bath...wow, suddenly. I felt like I was allowing her to die...like by not making her eat I was letting it happen...what if it wasn't TIME? Thank GOD for the hospice nurses who saw me through this. My mom passed in less than a week after her "turn". It was peaceful and I was sleeping in the same room with her (dad getting rest in another bedroom) when I woke up to agonal breathing, she had a restless night and I had given her liquid morphine a few times as she seemed uncomfortable. She never woke up, and her heart kept beating until the hospice nurse told her, "it's ok Shirley, you can go" and she did. I appreciated everything hospice did for us. We didn't need to get them involved until about 5 days before she died as she was up and about and doing her own cares so recently before she died. I miss her so much.

[swimmygo]

I lost my precious mother and best friend 3-29-10 and the best dad you could ever have 8-20-12. Everything changed and I'm not the same after 11 and 9 years of not seeing them. I saw my dear dad die as the hospice nurse was counting the seconds between his breathes. I think my precious mother knew I couldn't deal with seeing her die and I had left briefly to go to the grocery store when the caregiver called me and said come home. I can't wait to see them in Heaven and it will be the happiest day of my life.

[monanowlin]

I died when I was 36 and came back. The place I went to was perfect. Perfect temperature perfect lighting perfect smell. I was so peaceful. I saw my mom grandma and great grandma. Everything I loved was there. My mom held her hand out to me. I heard my husband calling. I chose to turn away. Secret regret always, yearning every day now that I am old. I am so disappointed every morning. But I know what's waiting so I have lived my life to the fullest, enjoying almost everything. My life had purpose and I am satisfied. I hope this helps someone.

[ducheau]

It is reassuring and helpful to know what to expect. But when the person you love dies, you can't prepare yourself for the grief that comes after

[ireneflaxman]

I lost my daughter Kate on 3rd February from a brain tumour she had for nearly 7 years We had Kates Funeral last week, I cant believe she has gone, I just want her back.

[maribara]

The sorrow and pain I feel for my sister who is going through this is so great. She’s so young. Prayers go out to everyone going through this.

[dwcookjr]

I firmly believe in providing the most pain free experience to the individual.... death with dignity.... laboring for breath and slow suffocation and the pain of organs shutting down is horrible.... it should be a persons right to decide not to drag things out .... we call it “humane “ to put an animal out of its misery but insist so often for others to keep suffering only to hold on to life for moments longer even if living is agonizing.... that is cruel abusive and inhumane

[tracyabass]

my mom had a burst of energy....She was my best friend, my everything, it will be 2yrs nov13th, I am so lost without her...