Dating as a single mother | Dating with children

Dating with children can be hard. On top of trying to find people who are willing to accept you despite the fact they were most likely just looking for a mate and not a whole family. Finding someone suitable for your children is another headache if you’re a good parent. This is why it’s so important to only choose worthy and responsible men to begin with. Everyone doesn’t make it out if the hophase unscathed. Do what you like with your life but never forget that your early decisions impact your choices down the road. Especially when it pertains to the access and option to choose quality men.

A lot of people have a dating checklist. Sometimes they get pretty long and ridiculous. And while the importance of following such a checklist is debatable it’s not when it comes to parents.
If you have children you absolutely need to have a checklist. A list including the basic needs of you and you’re children. The bells and whistles are negotiable but the necessities have to be met.

You can love his great beard but is he dependable? Can you count on him? Is he self obsessed. Volatile. Does he have a damn job? Does he honor your children? Would he accept the responsibility he has to add to them and be a resource in their lives. Is he a good influence? These things matter. I can tell you as a man who watched his mom date for the majority of my childhood. Kids little boys especially know the difference between a valid father figure and some guy just staying in their house banging their mom.

Every man you date don’t need to meet your children. In the event they are disappointed with your choices or start to lose respect for your decisions they don’t usually
verbally express it, they just go play. They play to relieve stress, and cope with being let down. To overcome the irritation of a new and unfit guy spilling his energy and influence in their once safe atmosphere.

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[KevHick]

This video is sponsored by Aura. Protect your devices, bank accounts,

[sweetzCA]

Its so aggravating as a single mom to also have to be the self sacrificing parent. From our careers, education, lifestyle, and love life, we always have to put ourselves last, yet the fathers get to escape the day to day responsibility almost unscathed and with their freedom. Not all single mothers made bad decisions. I was married for 8 years and had my child in the marriage and he decided to leave. But since I have the label as a single mom, I assumed to have been some hoe or baby mama. Fathers can go out and chase as much uncommitted pussy as they want without judgment, but we have always be on guard to protect our child.

[hope_revjfgsmith]

“EVERY MAN YOU DATE DOES NOT NEED TO MEET YOUR CHILDREN.” They do not need a succession of 20 “uncles.”

[jesselynnethornton]

I'm a single mother and dating is extremely difficult, bc as Kev just said there's a lot that you have to take into consideration. Thanks for the reinforcement Kev!

[unlikenoother]

I freaking love this guy!!!! A clear understanding of real life expectations of relations between a man and a woman...AWESOME!

[Steffortlessly]

“Does he have a damn job?” 😂😂😂😂 PREACH

[Alkemmiztt]

I'm a single mom with an autistic toddler, hes so loving and I know he misses having a male figure around but I dont just want anyone being around. I rather focus that energy towards making myself a better mother.

I personally dont think I could date a man with more than one child & if hes too deeply into his ex, I dont even want to look into it. I sometimes wonder if my standards are too high..

Also please ladies be aware that some men out here target single moms in order to prey on their children. Protect your babies & yourself

[majas]

Ladies, women, mothers, queens... Please for the love of God do think about who you bring home - it's a sick world we live in! Be careful of pedofiles!!!! Protect your kids and don't be manipulated!!!

[Devante]

Where were guys like you 26 years ago. I could've used a little encouragement and inspiration back then in the 90s when I was so foolishly attracted to bad boys. And yes, I was a good girl. Why do we always attract to the total opposite of who we are and how we were raised. Oh well, I've learned my lessons now and got it together before my kids became adults, but well after I destroyed myself trying to raise their daddy. Good info here ladies!!! Please listen up, please pay attention. He is so on point with this video. God bless you Kevin Hicks💖

[KevHick]

The hoe- phase references aren’t meant to insinuate single mothers are hoes who did something wrong. That should be obvious. But just in case it isn’t 😉 It’s to encourage women in their self proclaimed hoe phases to chose worthy men, even in casual hook ups.

[francescaspencer]

Too scared to date again as my childrens father was a narcissist and I'm scared to go through it again and put my children through it.... 😢

[Sweetpea]

When you mentioned the so many attributes you provide for your sons, tears came to my eyes because I am the very same for my two children, as their MOTHER. What a gift our children are. Too many, way too many ungrateful ass people are dropping the ball with their babies. Children don't deserve that. They love us so very much! I adore my children, advocate for them, teach them, nurture and feed them, appreciate them, love on them, hold them and kiss them, congratulate them, uplift them, value them, protect them and put them 1st in my life. That's my responsibility and I do it EVERY DAY WITH JOY. This was a beautiful, beautiful video. Keep dropping those nuggets of wisdom.

[amandatorres]

Finallyyyy. I remember requesting this one months ago. Thanks!

[keepthefaithwithtori]

I've made a choice not to date because my son is my priority. My son is 13 and he's never seen me with anyone ever. My son dad has made a choice not to call, visit, or have any contact. My son is hurting by it, but I am teaching him to Forgive his dad, love him, and pray for him. I have a brother and male friends that are positive male role models in his life. I can never teach him how to be a man. Great Video Btw Kev!

[lesliegonzales]

THANK YOU KEV!! 💪🏽 it's so difficult finding men that are worthy and then when u do find one, it's almost impossible to find the time to spend with the man in between work/school & babysitters. Not everyone is a babymama but trying to escape that image and have your own life is a struggle in today's society

[kristelglenn]

I'm a single mom. I been with a man with kids but never met them. And they never met mine.

[sweetsavagenails]

I find that most women don't want to make the sacrifice of putting there kids first, I know a few women that do, but most dont!
I dont incorporate dating and my kids...at all! I never have and it was a major sacrifice but I never wanted my children to feel like they were second.
My children are older so they always mention that I'm dating someone before I even share it with them because they're very good at knowing what Im up to, and I dont date often so they can tell..but I just don't mix the two.
I never want to blend anything with my kids, I'll never bring a man in our home and they're almost grown now so at this point and now they are begging me to get out and date..
And they always mention that I always put them first, and that I never put a man before them and it always makes my heart smile to hear them acknowledge that!

[tylynn]

I have a teenager. His opinion matters. The only man my son knows that I've been intimate with is his dad. He's always telling me I NEED to start dating cause he KNOWS I want a man. Lol I agree with everything your saying cousin.

[amberenergy]

Amen...I'm 35 years old, in therapy learning to recognize and appreciate my value after a childhood of feeling unworthy since my mom didn't consider me or my feelings when picking her boyfriends. Also in the process of healing from the abuse inflicted on me by those men she defended when I tried to tell her who they 'really' were.

[kayG]

Omg real talk this was one of the best videos that I've heard from you. Especially since I can relate to some of the things that you described. I'm a single mom and I went through the phase of choosing the wrong guy and my kid suffered emotionally because of my decision. Since then I've grown up and learned what really matters in life, and putting the need of my only child first is my only priority.