The Fastest Way to Become Miserable

I promise this type of relationship will never work out in the end. Let's talk about it.

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[susanpumphrey]

Pro Tip: People who are genuinely happy don't feel the need to spend a lot of time and energy defending the fact that they are happy.

[kigetit]

My sibling has been poly for over a decade and literally laughed when I told them I was getting married and said "it'll last a year". Fifteen years later, I have two beautiful children and a home. They live with my mom, alone.

[sterlingdennett]

"Tradition is not the worship of ashes, but the preservation of fire."
- Gustav Mahler

[navijha]

"nonmonogamous couples reported greater levels of commitment" when your definition of commitment is so wishy-washy that it means nothing, then yeah it's really easy to meet.

[bethanymiller]

So basically people want to cheat without being labeled a cheater. Their partner cheats. And they cheat. And then they’re miserable and hurt and feel lost, insecure, and without boundaries. Color me shocked.

[mithicash]

Polyamory only favors the party with more options and there is ALWAYS one party that has much more options than the other.

[Catie]

Im gonna be honest here, when i got married i was convinced i was polyamorous. My husband agreed and we did give it a go.
Surprise Surprise, the situation blew up in our faces.

I think my drive to be polyamorous is directly connected to the sexual and emotinal abuse during my childhood. I had no clue how to respect marriage, sex or my husband.
Choosing polyamory was THE WORST decision i ever made. I hurt my husband and damaged my marriage.

[rtyu]

James Dobson was asked why people cheat. He said the #1 reason was EGO: people want to know they're still attractive and desirable to others.
How about staying attractive and desirable to the one person who matters?

[rl]

I knew one Poly couple who would come to one of my friends parties and get togethers and I have never heard more messy stories and hidden jelousy and the husband falling in love with the new younger more driven woman and so on and so on...I could never imagine disrespecting myself like that. ever.
You either want all of me or none of me. Period.

[shandorunia]

Anyone who asks you for an open relationship has already cheated in their mind. They knew who they are going to do it with before you even talked about it.
Run and dont ever look back.

[romrom]

Polygamy isnt just "weird" it feels fundamentally wrong to me, how miserable do you have to be to accept "sharing" something as sacred as love, that just feels like digging your own romantical grave.

[angelamullins]

I met my husband at 20, married at 23. We were virgins together. It has been an amazing 36 years.! I feel safe and complete. I never worried about any transmitted diseases (AIDS was just beginning to spread). Our intimacy is more than sexual which is comforting. I haven’t compared him to another or been compared to another by him it keeps us bonded as one through God.

[bleukettu]

I've known one poly group and those 5 people were the most depressed, miserable, and selfish people I'd ever met. The amount of back stabing, manipulating, and thinly masked resentment was mind blowing. Yet if anyone ever asked you'd think they'd found a new form of enlightenment.

[Ifailedeverything]

You know those thousand lb pumpkins that win the ribbon at the fair? They get the prize because the farmer cuts all the other pumpkins off the vine and devotes all of his time into tending that pumpkin. That’s how your marriage should be. 🎃

[rockellex]

Open relationships were pretty popular when I was in college and being surrounded by that kind of environment was a bit uncomfortable for me. One of my old friends got in an open relationship and people got mad at me for not agreeing with that relationship, my ex wanted an open relationship and I remember my voice cracking and heart breaking in response (I said no and we broke up like the week after), and my former roommate and her boyfriend were in an open relationship. That last one was especially uncomfortable because the boyfriend would constantly hit on me and even asked me out once his girlfriend and I stopped being roommates. I said no. And when it came to my old friend, ex-roommate, and her boyfriend, they would all get SUPER defensive whenever someone didn’t agree with their relationships. They would get defensive, try to convince themselves that they were happy, and sometimes verbally attack the person who disagrees. It was unfortunate to witness.

[IphigeniaAtAulis]

Poly people are the vegans of relationships. They're constantly telling people how wonderful their lifestyle is, all through gritted teeth while looking like they are about to have a nervous breakdown and start crying.

[maliamichelle]

I would never share my partner. Poly is so weird to me.

[balloonbunny-]

My ex wanted to bring a third into our bed. I told her absolutely not. Strange that she brought this up after befriending people from two different poly relationships.

[caitlinomeara]

As someone whose husband wanted this, whose husband thought and convinced me it would spice things up, boy were we wrong.

I was pressured into it and regretted it immediately, but we kept it up for 5 months. It almost destroyed our marriage but thank God I brought him back to the light. We kicked those scumbags to the curb and we’ve never been closer or happier.

No matter how “boring” things get, it’s vastly better than the alternative.

[IphigeniaAtAulis]

People want something between monogamy and and complete non-monogamy.

Translation: people want to go out and sleep around but have their partner remain faithful.