Meeting A Fellow Survivor Of Domestic Abuse: Abused By My Girlfriend

After sharing his shocking story, Alex meets a fellow survivor of domestic violence.

--

Did you know that we’re up to other things in other places too?

Oh, we’re on Snapchat too - just incase you were wondering… add us, bbcthree.

[VeeLondon]

By sharing your stories you have most definitely started a conversation. Brought attention to this serious issue of male domestic violence. Your both incredibly brave. And this will probably saved lives.

[claytonmoss]

I’m a young lad I’m 14 and this is good advice this needs more exposure

[jadesavedbygrace]

These guys are so brave. Not many people know about male domestic violence survivors. I am one of the common faces of domestic violance. My thoughts go out to all who survive and are able to leave their abusers. ♥️

[LILACCARB]

About time this has come out my dad suffered at the hands of my mother it’s really something taboo because men are looked at as weak if they don’t do anything about it.... we need to takeaway the stigma so thank you so much for sharing your story you are so strong and telling a truth that must be told!

[carlosr]

Why didn't he fight back. Oh yes I forgot he would of got charged with assault or domestic abuse.

[WarbirdPhoenix]

"The healing process takes time isn't it?"
Boy does it... 😞

[Shwetank_Raj]

I was in an abusive relationship for 6 years. The 1st year was all cute and lovely but soon she started to play mind games, making fun of my dreams/aspirations, telling me that I wasn't a good singer/engineer, that I didn't look good. She abused me mentally to the point that I started crying and then used to make fun of me for expressing myself through tears. She was in a different city so she went out with other boys and when I confronted her about it she blamed it on me some way or the other, and when I tried to breakup and leave she won't let me...again by emotional blackmail, begging. There was many other ways she put me through extreme mental stress...i can't list all here. She tried to condition me into thinking that abuse like that was normal and I should put up with it because it was what "a good boyfriend like me should do". I was told by my friends that I should leave her for good, they cared for me whenever I was sad, they never made fun of me when I cried about the situations I was in and about the fact that I was unable to take it anymore. I have the best friends that anyone can ask for. They were always with me, trying to cheer me up, suggesting ways to cope up with my problems, never putting me down for not breaking up with my gf and giving her control over me. I love my brothers from other mothers. People don't seem to understand how someone can be "stuck" in a relationship and the impact of mental abuse on a person. My advice to people who are still suffering from abuse by the hands of their girlfriend: don't lie and say that you're fine when someone/friend/family tries to help you, share your feelings, situation and take their help to get out of the relationship/abusive environment. I hope boys suffering can get out and move on with their lives. Take care my brothers.

[louloubelle]

It took me 3 whole years to mentally recover from domestic violence. Omgggg it’s horrific what another ‘human’ can do to someone. My first relationship was hell, ended up being beat up with a hammer at 18 xx 😘 say a prayer to the victims xx

[Luna_MorningStar]

Comments that say MAN UP or Wlk away. It doesnt work like that, I've been in a abusive relationship. If you ever try to leave they will beat you up and if you got bruises your on lock down until they heal. You never do anything alone. Just because your a man it can happen to you but I promise your not alone and there always is a way out

[mdlinksthetopg]

Fellow domestic abuse victim here. I feel ya brother

[philippelaurin]

Im a male
From canada
At the age of 20
I was in an abusive relationship
Emotionally and physically
But because I'M a I had no resources or help

[PepsiAddict]

I've definitely had my share of abuse. The second relationship I was in involved me being criticized, mocked, isolated and had my privacy invaded, plus the girl I was with made me feel as if I was unattractive (she expected me to want to shave my head for whatever reason). I was even told by her to stay away from some friends of mine and she even had the gall to bring up topics that she knew made me uncomfortable. Believe me, I've had nightmares about the whole experience.

[jaxbarny]

Men need to speak out before it’s too late. These young men are lucky to be alive.

[Rookie]

Alex my heart goes out to you and your family.

I am 35 now, a man, and between the age of 23-27 I was in an abusive relationship. I just wanted to share so that others know how these things happen. This was my first long-term relationship after my dad had died three years before. I hadn’t spoken about his death until I had met this new girlfriend. I opened up to her about all of the emotions around his death, which was the first time I’ve ever spoken about it. At the same time, she also found out that I had slept with a couple of guys around the time of having met her. She told me I was disgusting, not worthy of love, but at the time still wanted to be with me.

After a week of abuse I told her I wanted to end it. She said i couldn’t end it, or she would tell everyone she could about me having slept with guys. At the time I was too ashamed and scared to stand up to her. It was 4 years of insanely cruel behaviour and trying to isolate me from my friends.

I remember one day she abused me because I cried after having seen a motorbike crash, where the guy most likely died. Telling me I wasn’t a man and was worthless.

It took a long time, but I saw a therapist and eventually my strength grew…until eventually I was no longer the victim she wanted, and it ended.

I am blessed that I got out when I did.

Female abusers can be just as emotionally manipulative and cruel as male abusers. This is a stigma that needs to be addressed.

Thank you again Alex for your bravery! I would also love to get involved with any charity work.

[ambertwin]

Thank you both for sharing your stories 🙏♥️ someone will love you and treat you the way you're supposed to . You're loved and wanted . I'm sorry you went through this both of you :(

[hamishkay]

My ex girlfriend sexually abused me when I was 12 until I was 19. She almost killed me with a meat cleaver saying she'd skin me alive. I'm now 23 with scars of the abuse. I hated her and I'm so happy that she is gone. I never want to go through the same thing I had to suffer with

[cataleya]

This is so horrible! No one has the right to lay a finger on you!!😡 bless his soul I hope he’s in a better place now🙏

[deborahmackenzie]

I see ALOT of what I think as abuse against men in every day life: guys not aloud to go out unless their girlfriends say so, having to get Rid it female friends, girlfriends tracking their whereabouts on their phone and I just think if a man treated a woman like that they would be classed as controlling and mentally abusive

[kevinkascolinkeithtimghera]

I told police of 15 years of beatings, 25 years of narc abuse. Heard nothing back, maybe never will...

[thelitsquad]

A lot of cringey comments hear from people trying to downplay the severity of males being the victim of domestic violence. And yet men and women who were the victims of domestic violence will always see eye-to-eye and support each other