9 *Life Secrets* That Will Change Your Life IMMEDIATELY!

9 *Life Secrets* That Will Change Your Life IMMEDIATELY!

♡ TIKTOK: @SheaWhitney22

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⭐️LIFE SECRETS - VIDEO CHAPTERS⭐️

0:00 Intro
0:28 Life Secret 1
1:25 Life Secret 2
2:26 Life Secret 3
3:41 Life Secret 4
4:44 Life Secret 5
5:35 Life Secret 6
6:28 Life Secret 7
8:01 Life Secret 8
8:53 Life Secret 9

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[WomanRoaring]

#6 is so important. I spent 6 years with a guy who people described as a nice guy and he was nice but I wasn't important to him. He didn't beat me, cheat on me or say mean things to me but After 2 years I started to feel unimportant to him. Everyone else came first. His priorities were, Job, Parents, Family, Friends and then me. When I was finished with college (I was older not 21) I was thinking, he wants to get married but I'm so unhappy. I was very vocal about it, I told him what I wanted and needed from him but he totally ignored it, he'd change for a week or two and see I was happy then go back to how he was before. I kept thinking, if we have a baby I'll be home alone with the baby and he'll be out with his friends or over at his families house and his child and I won't be important to him. So I broke up with him. I realized I'd rather be sad an alone than feel sad and alone cuz I can do something about feeling sad and alone when I'm actually alone. Now I have a hubby who's amazing and we're both happy not just 1 of us.

[mfp]

#2 - It's called empathy. When people are upset about something, they just need a friend to listen and share their pain. They don't need a cheerleader. I'm very happy you talked about this!!

[loriunderwood]

Good advice! I used to interrupt people as they were speaking as I felt like I knew what they were going to say and I was thinking how to respond. What I do now is really LISTEN to what the person speaking is saying then respond. I have noticed that makes a big difference for both parties.

[MoonRaven]

I listened very carefully, Shea…to everything you said…I am 66, have had quite a difficult life, barely survived 5 weeks in coma because of lung Covid, lost everything money wise in my life because of a gambling husband but everything you say is true! Life would be so much better if we all followed these life “rules”.🙏🏻🥰I have so little money but still I help there where I can and seeing a person’s reaction, is one of the best things you’ll ever see..😊
Thank you for helping me realize that things can truly get better in a lot of ways.🙏🏻🥰

[kwclove]

Interrupting people causes them to feel unheard. It took me a long time to realize I was so bad at this. Great list. All are great reminders! 🌞❤️

[traceytrotter]

Secret #2 (being "in it" when someone is upset) is so important and you realizing that at your age is wonderful. I was a teacher (best advice for moms as well) and when a kid got hurt I would do just that. Tell them man this hurts... sorta thing. Same philosophy. Great advice. Thanks Sweetie!

[lindsayslifecafe]

#2! Amen sister! I’ve learned to be empathetic and affirm their feelings and also listen! No talking! Just listening sympathetically

[kimmys]

YES to the job thing!!! I was at my job for years....got burnt out, plus job culture changed for the worse about 10 years ago ( whole team agreed it was bad!). I changed companies....but same industry. I feel like I work in Disneyland now...it is THAT much better.
Now matter your age ..don't be shy about getting out and finding a new job/ career!

[samanthahunter]

I recently got in to a habit of calling my friends out when they say they are fine but clearly are not. We are all guilty of acting like everything is OK when actually inside we are falling apart. Making people feel able to express their true feelings makes them feel truly supported and it is possible to do this without pushing them to talk before they are ready.

[amandachristoffel]

I absolutely agree with number 2. I feel like telling someone “everything will be ok” or to look on the bright side makes that person feel like you don’t understand them. Unless someone is asking for your advice on a solution I’ve found that they just want you to listen and wallow in those feelings with them. That’s not to say, though, that you shouldn’t speak up if there are real warning signs that the person may pose a danger to themselves or others.

[susannehutchings]

Well said. You could have also titled this “Life Lessons”. The self awareness tip about not trying to make someone feel better when they are feeling down is so true. Joining in with a friend while they process something unbearable is the greatest gift you can give. There will be time later to help encourage them along the journey. Something I am working on as a way to improve my life is never to say, “You should……” do this or you should do that. Unsolicited advice is the worst advice and in my experience puts people immediately on the defensive. Instead, saying nothing is often the most effective.

[beautybybridgette]

I didn’t hate my 9-5 either but once I had my baby and became a full time mom I realized “wow, this is what I’m supposed to be doing.” No, I don’t make money, but I am SO much more fulfilled then when I was making money… hopefully that makes sense.

[milkduds]

#9 is so on point. I caught myself doing it and stopped it and now I am very aware of so many people doing it to me, as well as other people. Great list of tips. Thank you.

[deborahserio]

Thank you Shea! I put social media and texting up there with road rage. People are much more apt to write things they would hesitate to say in person. Hiding behind the phone or email. I understood your intention, which was good, but I’m always careful giving relationship advice. That’s one of those things that can back and bite you!

[karathomas]

When friends are venting/upset, I ask, “are looking for advice? Or just need me to listen?” As I adopted this, i have found most people just want me to listen and I usually don’t need to ask anymore, I can usually tell when they just want me to be quiet and listen. It is my nature to want to fix things, so this was hard for me, but makes me a better friend/wife/sister/daughter.

[valdez]

That’s because “ It is more blessed to give than to receive “ Jesus said it. Giving brings so much joy! I retired early so I can be a giver and volunteer in my community. Great video, Shea! One of your best! Shalom.

[calmlyness]

I love the last one! I try and be conscious about letting people finish before I start speaking but I hardly ever find anyone who does the same back. So I'm grateful to you Shea for putting it out there, I hope people start noticing this and practice it more. :)

[daphnehill]

Great video! Brené Brown speaks about empathy vs sympathy (#2) so brilliantly. It can seem counterintuitive to not tell a friend who’s hurting things like “Hey, at least you’re not whatever whatever…” but it really is better just to let them vent, rage whatever they need to do. Thanks for sharing this. 😊

[amyrenshaw]

I think you should do more videos like this Shea! You have so much wonderful ‘life advice’ and this is often a treat contrast to videos more centered around making purchases. Thank you so much & hope to see more!

[Stef]

Shea, This video was one of my favorites of yours!! It wasn’t the normal stuff everyone talks about, these we’re such great reminders that don’t get enough attention! Would love to see more like this!! 💕