Things I say as an EMT

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*Does not represent correct practice*

#ems #firefighter #911

[GaryLiseo]

"Fuck around and find out" is probably how a lot of people wind up meeting you

[LFFL]

"You're going to meet a lot of people really really fast" Is not something you want to hear

[SurrealGoats]

"Everythings fine" emt code for "We're about to wrestle with god to keep you here"

[mapletreegames]

When the siren gets suddenly turned on with you in it that's "oh shit level 2" but when they say everything is fine that's "the reaper is chasing us and we need to be faster"

[a.t]

The patients who don't know how close they are always get the heart pumping 😅

[seyodys]

If I’m ever dying in the back of an ambulance, the EMT had better have this guy’s sense of humor. Else I’m not dying

[AsclepiasCorridor]

The hospital MET version is: “Ooh, that heart rate’s doing some interesting things, isn’t it. I’m just gonna press this button here. Just so you know, a lot of people are about to come in, do a bit of poking and prodding, possibly being a bit loud and dramatic, but no worries. You just sit back, relax and…oh look, here they are.”

[turtleofpride]

"Hes waving a broken bottle around and we dont get paid enough" sounds like the entire medical profession.

[thedragonofcanada]

"Gloves ... and baby wipes ... and fire ... lots of fire ... only fire can get rid of that."

[kate_]

Once I was in the hospital and they said “Okay you’re fine but we’re gonna send you down to the ICU. You’re gonna see some really sick people there but you’re fine!” In retrospect I do not think I was indeed fine 😂 (I’m fine now)

[atlas]

“You’re gonna meet a lot of people really really fast.”

I can’t tell if he means a lot of doctors or a lot of ancestors… probably both

[DollyDimples]

I remember being rushed to another hospital... The guy sitting beside me jumped into action, putting another drip in and some bag... I was just laying there chilled 😂 i didn't know how close i was to death doors...i just felt peace with it all, and I'm just chatting away like any other day...and he told his buddy "yeah we going to need to speed up"

Amazing how these earth angel's work really fast, saving lives and the difficult patients they deal with every day not giving up... Thank you for everything you do ❤ loving these funny videos 😂

[alexisbloodwood]

It took me a second watch to realize it was a dog and not just an awful scene you noped out of

[-Ghostess]

"You're going to meet a lot of people really fast"

That was me my last hospital stay. Except it was "You're about to be a lesson in listening to patients for a lot of students, then meeting patient relations reps."
I had a fall, went to ER, told them I had pain and bleeding and asked them to check my IUD didn't get moved. They ignored me. Two days later my partner made me go back because I was still hurting and bleeding. My IUD had punched a hole in my uterus, and my WBC count was 17, 000. I have never seen more than one patient relations rep in one place and I had three in my room getting details of who screwed me over and how.
That was also the stay when I learned that IV doxy 10 on just a piggy back bag should legally count as torture.

[Roseknight]

*bang bang sirens*

Yeah I dunno what a 12 lead detects for, but that person Is having a rough day

[rickyjones]

Went to the ER last week for swelling in my legs and shortness of breath. 5 hours later i was being transferred via ambulance an hour away because my heart rate wasnt going below 170, the moment i knew i was cooked was when they brought me into my icu room and there was 5 doctors and two med students.

[guybrodsky]

"everything is fine" as the nurse brings a defibrillator to be on stand by beside my bed. XD

[unablesmilethegamer]

Bang bang = “remember how I said don’t go 80 mph through a intersection yeah forget I said that”

[allyenderman]

My fiancèe, a couple years ago, ended up with pneumonia that she ignored because she was waiting for payday so she could pay the copay for an urgent care visit. Unfortunately it spiraled out of control EXTREMELY quickly, nearly turned into sepsis, and I had to call 911 when she passed out in a pool of her own vomit (it was this clear, watery stuff, not even proper vomit, and yes I got her hauled out of it so she didn't aspirate). She had a fever of 104° AFTER the FD first responders put instant ice packs on the heat points on the body to bring her temp down and get her away from going into full-blown shock.

Apparently she came back to reality in the ambulance on the way to the hospital less than ten minutes up the road (I was following behind in the car) and heard the paramedic in the back with her sending an order for a trauma bay with an ETA. And this woman, the love of my life, is autistic with a special interest in medical science and likes to jokingly say she "jury-rigged her way to o a back-alley medical degree" because of the amount of information she knows thanks to the amount of medical and pharmaceutical textbooks she's had access to through her mother, who was a biochemist for a damn long while before having kids.

So her response to hearing that request and knowing some of the shorthand that gets given to keep patients from flipping shit and being convinced they're gonna die, was "WOAH, I'M **FUCKED UP!"** Which was on the live comm line. And heard by everyone who had access to that line.

Later on in the actual ER bay one of the nurses who had been privy to that specific comm from the ambulance, when my fiancèe was at least slightly more coherent, stopped by and joked "So I hear you're the one who's fucked up?"

[stacey]

Being the person on the receiving end of emergency intervention is quite a wild thing. I've had the same thing said to me. "Things are gonna happen really fast". It was an emergency cesarean, and I think the baby was out in like 15 min.