Playful Pushes: How To Charm Someone Out Of Your League

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When it comes to dating, most people don’t have as many options as they’d like.

Or the options you do have feel like settling, and you have this nagging feeling that you want to do better.

Then you see some people who consistently date out of their league. How do they do it?
In this video, we’ll breakdown the start to several unlikely celebrity couples, and use them to show you seven tips to help you date out of your league.

Later in the video, we’ll explain why “leagues” are problematic. But for now, assume “out of your league,” refers to anyone you believe is above you in attractiveness, wealth, fame, or social status.
We’ll be focusing on men interacting with women since that’s my own personal experience, but similar principles will apply no matter who you like.

⏰TIMESTAMPS⏰

0:00 - Intro
1:36 - #1: Have access to the person
2:58 - #2: You have to stand out
3:47 - #3: Playfully tease
6:50 - #4: Prioritize being honest
8:01 - #5: Have other good things in your life
11:50 - #6: Minimize your nervousness
13:19 - #7: Dating "out of your league" is a bad goal

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[lilnicky]

LMAO the fact that Pete Davidson has become the universal sign of dating out of your league is my favorite thing that's ever happened in pop culture.

[thisguy]

"If you put someone on a pedestal they have no choice but to look down on you"
forgot who said that

[PeytonDLifts]

“If you’re ugly make her laugh. Her eyes will be closed more”

[jeffw]

As it’s been said elsewhere. “If you treat her like a celebrity, she’ll treat you like a fan.”

[StrippedDownPodcast]

Step 1. Stop thinking ANYONES out of your league strictly based on their appearance.

[GibranEscobell]

You need to level the playing field by raising your value internally. You do that by changing your self beliefs. What you tell yourself determines the way to act, speak, walk, behave. You could be good looking and strong and act weak because you believe you are not good enough.

[CCEkeke]

If you believe that someone is out of your league, then you're right. Looks, wealth and status can only take someone so far. Confidence, kindness toward others, and a lifestyle that you enjoy go much further in the long run.

[anthonypc]

Keep in mind that judging what "league" you'd put someone in depends on what you value.

Some supermodel could be dating someone way out of her or his league intellectually.
A billionaire could manage to attract a life partner in a whole other league of emotional maturity and qualities for an ideal supportive relationship.

[tasdiqjubaer]

1) Have access to the person
2) Stand out from the rest
3) Playful teases
4) Be honest and don't be FAKE
5) Have other good things in your life apart from the person
6) Minimize your nervousness
7) Dating "out of your league" is a bad goal because of reasons mentioned in 13:18

[poorwhitepeoplearefailures]

For men, pre-selection by other women is also a huge thing. As someone who has always dated women “out of my league” looks wise (I consider myself fairly good looking but if you saw them you’d be like, wow wtf) I think a large part of it was getting the first girl out of my league and then staying friends with her. Not only did this allow me to meet more people, but also hinted to other girls “there must be something about him”, since my first gf gave me a shot. Make friends with other women. Seriously, I owe a lot to her actually.

It lets them know immediately that you’re likely not a creep, and have desirable qualities. Also, once it happens once, you’re no longer intimidated. I always just remember this line “every single person you’ve ever met has had explosive diarrhea or an embarsssing memory”. I may lack some things socially, but I’ve never had issues with self worth or being intimidated by people. Stand your ground. For every person who you’ll piss off, another will like it, and you want strong feelings either way. It is easier to turn hate into attraction than indifference into attraction. Attraction and hate are fairly similar from a brain chemistry standpoint

[MuseSunflower]

As a woman, it's actually not a compliment to be put on a pedestal. Mens lust often drives them to do very dehumanizing things because they want the validation and goal of getting the attractive woman forgetting that she's human with her own flaws, traumas, fears, agency, autonomy etc

Being the target of this feels very lonely.

I'm not saying that's what the video stated but it could easily go in that objectifying direction if not mindful.

Just treat her like she's normal

[desireec]

i thought my boyfriend was out of my league, i still do, but i made him laugh and was always genuine with my intentions. still together 3 years later

[lockiet]

Dating someone out of your league could also mean dating someone below your league

[JustenHarden]

Great advice, per always. To that last point you made - one of my favorite things I’ve ever heard on that idea: “The ultimate purpose of the goal is not to achieve the goal; it is who we become to achieve it.”

[sab]

With the help of social media, I've come to terms that everyone is overrated.

[rodrigokk]

Foot Note: ALL of these couples have broke up/divorced.

[Briaaanz]

A couple of friends dated. She was gorgeous and everyone thought she was out of his league.
He had good confidence, but the real problem was that she was a target of men every time they went out. Wingmen would try to split them up so their friends could hit on her.
She would rebuff the advances, but it made going out to be really problematic.

[cricketever]

"... rather than stalking alone around the venue"

This one hit lolll

[JohnPaul-oqud]

12:12 I do this at interviews. When I'm nervous waiting in the foyer I chit-chat to the person at the front desk. This helps to distract my thoughts/second guesses, warms up my communication, and establishes familiarity. I also make sure to repeat what they say, smile brightly and say "it was nice chatting with you" as the person who interviews me walks in. This way they see that I'm friendly.

[Void-Angel]

I always felt I was missing information when talking to people or dating and needed something to mimic or learn from as I had not had any good or meaningful experiences that let me learn. This, this right here is fantastic.