How To Raise Free-Thinking Children

Listen to your children, ask them questions, and get them to represent what they are thinking clearly. There is nothing more productive and generous than to listen.

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[ThomasSmith-zq]

Honestly, this book ‘Raising Warriors: Preparing Your Children For a Godly Life’ gave me the encouragement I needed to stay strong in raising my kids with Christian values, it’s comforting to know Im not alone on this journey

[FinalFantasy]

I am 24 years old with serious accountability and anger issues. I grew up in a house hold where my dad would scream at the drop of a pin. My mom was super emotional and unstable. I needed my parents both so desperately but they had their own problems with each other. I never see them tell each other they love each other, no hugs and kisses. I haven’t seen that since I was a child. It really starts in the household. I feel like a sack of shit at 24 with emotional and behavioral problems but no more. Jordan is teaching me to look through a different lense, to think for myself. If you’re on the same journey as me, be kind to yourself and definitely don’t give up on yourself. YOU deserve peace. Your inner child deserves it too.

[samlafontaine]

My dad taught me to ask why, question everything and don't take the face value. It's one of the lessons that always stuck with me and made a lot of sense, I'm glad he was a good critical thinker and could raise me as well as he could. I wouldn't be the same person today.

[marsjokes]

"If you're bored by people, you're not listening to them."

That's something I've noticed in my everyday life about myself and other people, too. It's very interesting.

[Treebohr]

I have a friend who was conditioned by his parents to shut up and just accept what they said. He describes arguing with his parents a couple times when he was young (no older than 10, iirc) because they had said something that didn't make sense to him. Either it was blatantly unfair from his perspective or it was simply, factually incorrect. He says he would win the argument logically, and his parents punished him for it. He still struggles with any form of confrontation to this day.

[jasonayres]

"It is easier to build strong children, than to repair broken men."

[christiandean]

JP touches on a great parenting philosophy called Taking Children Seriously.

The title explains it. Children are People. Take their wishes, concerns, fears, and ideas seriously, as you would anyone else.

Not being taking seriously chronically probably contributes to much of children’s mental suffering (although we look for blame elsewhere, like social media).

[ItsDuskBaby]

Always good to learn about children development before having children so you know what to do when the moment arises

[Haze]

I wish more people were this articulate.

[cjfredi]

This man has the whole world listening. 💟

[sherlock]

My brother tells my mom that its her fault that we question everything. My mom is not a stupid person, she is not easily manipulated. She passed that on to us. Gets you in a lot of trouble but saves you from a lot of trouble too. We used to have family bible studied but they usually devolved into a large debate.😂

[ErikaJereka]

When I was working with clients, I always did exactly what he was saying, I would reflect to the client what I heard and ask “Did I understand right?” Clients always cried, and shared they felt this was the first time they actually felt somebody cared enough to listen and try to understand their experience. This came from clients who had been in therapy for years with other therapists, and I had barely graduated my masters program. The skill he talks about is very true and I can attest very important to practice as a clinician and does wonders in your actual relationships.

[youhavemysympathy.]

My nephew used to believe in ghosts, he was very adamant about their existence and would show me videos on YouTube. He was 8 years old. I didn't want to destroy his fun. One day he asked me if I believed in them. I told him I didn't and I explained why and that all I'd need is sufficient evidence for phenomenon that had no other explanation. From that day onwards he has approached absolutely everything with that mindset. It's the thing I'm most proud of in my life. One small conversation with a child opened their mind and changed their way of thinking, for the better.
He questions absolutely everything now. Skeptical, quizzical but never cynical.
He's a 17 year old man now. Great lad. Loves Jordan too.

[lyndahutchinson]

Have seen teachers teach children how to do this with each other. It's truly incredible. It's magnificent to see children to learn in a classroom where they listen to, and love, each other.

[stoneyascension]

When I reflect on my life, one thing I wish I had done more of is listen. I completely agree with JP's wisdom: everyone, from a toddler to a centenarian, has a story to tell about their lives, and they want to tell you that story.

[deantsar]

Dr Peterson.
I have just listened to what you said, without taking a break.
I thank you for this piece of gold information.
You can not offend someone by actively listening to their story.
👍

[h.davidburstein]

Developing one’s listening skills may be the best way to battle loneliness. Another way is to have a purpose of serving others. So by simply being present and quiet with others we hopefully help them reach their potential.

[_scabs]

My father is really good at this. Even when I was a little kid like on my visitation with him at 5 or 6 years old he would ask for my input on things. Which movie did I want to see at the theater. This afternoon we can play go carts or put put golf, which one did I want? Or pick out the kind of dessert that I wanted at the store for after dinner. I got to pick out my own comics to pick up on the weekly and monthly at the comics store but I had to save up my allowance to buy them. Dad also engaged my imagination through the kinds of comics and TV shows and movies he would show me, and talking about them with me, and giving me visualization techniques about the movies to help me conquer my fears. He would also find constructive punishments for the rules he set. That was a big player also! because finding out that there were consequences to my decisions (both good and bad, fun or not enjoyable) gave me a sense of agency over my life and thoughts even at a young age. Now I try to be just as thoughtful and open with him and other people. I hope I can be that good of a Dad when I have my own kids. ❤

[Hilltopperpete]

"Train up a child in the way he should go, And when he is old he will not depart from it."

Proverbs 22:6

[thetrain]

it’s all about consistency and follow through. kids remember more than we give credit to.