JD Vance Did WHAT to a Couch?!

During JD Vance’s first week as Trump’s VP pick, he and his team have been consumed with trying to shut down the most insane rumors.

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[philjimito]

"I did not have sexual relations with that sofa. . ."
-J.D. Vance

[Minishot_Lore]

Some girl to her boyfriend: "Why don't you look at me like JD Vance looks at the couch?"

[brockgn]

Must have been a pull-out couch as there’s no rumours of any illegitimate couches, at least not yet

[TheDudeAbides]

I love how all the marines in the comment thread are like, “yeah that’s normal.” 😂

[RILDIGITAL]

It's astonishing how a single tweet can fuel such outlandish stories and fan the flames of misinformation. It's a testament to the power and danger of the internet and social media.

[Eric-cjph]

He's a Marine. I'm quite sure this is not the worst thing he has ever done.

[Michael-eeuz]

I have the first edition. I can confirm, he did not have sexual relations with that couch.

[mommabear]

My mother-in-law worked in an ER... It's not just teenagers. She saw grown men come in needing to have objects such as shampoo bottles removed because they got stuck.

[jrmustang]

if this is the worst thing about JD Vance, I think we'll be just fine.

[engineeranonymous]

In the Senate Committee "Sir, Did you f**k the couch. Before you answer I want to remind you that you are under oath. "🤣

[ChristopherSummer]

Snopes disproved this Story -- in Fact, the Guy who edited his pirated Copy of the E-Book to display those Pages, he himself told Snopes that he faked it and explained how he did it, while laughing at his own "Joke". To find the Snopes-Article, search "No, 1st Edition of JD Vance's 'Hillbilly Elegy' Doesn't Mention Couch Cushion 'Eroticism'".

[amyrietveld]

I looked it up. According to Snopes, the screenshots of the supposed "first edition" was actually a manipulation of a pirated e-book.

[TEENFORMER]

As a teenage boy, I don't know why y'all are going crazy, you'd be surprised by what I've heard...

[sahilkhurana_]

Imagine Trump asking JD "you did what..?"

[UnremarkableMarx]

Kennedy tapped every staffer that breathed. Vance tapped every chesterfield that squeaked.

[moneyblade]

Couches, mattresses, pillows, chairs, stuffed toys, and fruits. It’s all very common.

[Lancelot]

JD Is a Marine. We do crazy shit civilians won’t understand 🤷‍♂️

[brianbayot]

So you're telling me JD Vance, a fiery politician that used to be a Marine in Iraq, did Marine things? And he ADMITTED IT?

I'd like ten more politicians with that kind of honesty and confidence please.

[sarmatapl]

Well, I checked his book (also first edition!!!), it isn't there.

This fragment in his book goes like this:

"Years later, I looked at my wedding party of six groomsmen and realized that every single one of them had, like me, grown up in a small Ohio town before leaving for Ohio State. To a man, all of them had found careers outside of their hometowns, and none of them had any interest in ever going back."

[liasisboa]

At least he won’t have to pay the couch $130k to stay quiet.