Is There Such a Thing as 'The One'? Does God Predestine Your Spouse?

Is there such a a thing as the one? Does god predestine your spouse? Does God plan who you will marry? Does God choose your husband or wife? Does God choose your mate?

These are complicated questions that go beyond the topic of relationships and are really more theological. If you are a Calvinist, you must say that God plans your marriage because he plans everything. If you are an Arminian, you will say that God does not plan who you who you will marry because man's free will is what determines the outcomes.

Is there such a thing as the one? You will answer this question differently based upon your understanding of God's sovereignty and man's free will. I believe that God does choose your spouse but he will bring about "the one" through you making free choices.

However, I respect that some do not believe in "the one" and say there is no such thing because they have a different understanding of what the Bible says about God's will and man's will.

My biggest point is that you should make sure you are basing your beliefs on Scripture and what the Bible actually says rather than your personal opinion about "Is there such a thing as the one?"

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Is there such a a thing as the one?
Does god predestine your spouse?
Does God plan who you will marry?
Does God choose your husband or wife?
Does God choose your mate?

[jo-annlouw]

I believe if you talk to God and pray for the right husband, God will answer you, God did it for me and I'm holding onto His word.

[Gilbertlouise]

When God gives you a dream...you will know. There will be no question. When God tells you something, its personal...he will make sure that you have understood that its definitely from him. My sheep know my voice. Believe and don't doubt. God knows what you will think before you think it, what you will say before you say it...Isaiah 46:10, he declares the end from the beginning. He can and will show you who you will marry, if its in his will...but you got to step close to him first and ask him. Just think it or say it. He knows you already. Hes an awesome God.

[wpmarie]

Many are the plans in a person’s heart, but it is the Lord ’s purpose that prevails.
Proverbs 19:21 NIV

[dallasm.]

But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you. Mattthew 6:33*

[GinMatt]

God knows best. Pray about it, God will give you the answer. And please, wait, ✋ stop, ⛔. Don't rush just to accept anyone in your life because you feel lonely.

[valerielinares]

What you're saying here reminds me of a scripture: "A man’s heart plans his way, But the Lord directs his steps" Proverbs 16:9.

[rizalinaayrosoa.k.a.kimbro]

If God plan’s who I will marry.... I’ll do it!
I go with God’s plan❤️

[tristanarnold]

My husband and I have been married for 12 years. It's only been in the last 2 years that we've come to realize how perfectly we compliment one another! We married in our 40's, both of us having very different lives, but both of our lives had been tumultuous. We'd both been through different hells. Our marriage was tested HARD recently, from severe bullying by extended family members. We went to couple's therapy. Our therapist is a former Pastor. We realize now how we are healing each other, protecting each other, learning together, celebrating our victories, and fixing our mistakes.
Yes, God made me for him. And God made him for me. It's not always easy, and it's rarely perfect, but we feel God beaming at us as we struggle TOGETHER.
Blessed and thankful.

[kimberlyflowers]

I love when my pastor says that God is so thorough that he requires you to seek his will so that he’s able to guide your choices 🙌🏽🙌🏽

[gct]

A very old Christian once told me " you can't steer a parked car" in other words ....live Godly go in what you think is Gods direction and he will adjust your course.

[Gilbertlouise]

Simply seek God. Ask him. Just make sure you can handle his answer if it's a no. The Holy Spirit does use the Bible and we can learn a lot from the Bible about what God has done before...But please guys, understand that he is with you always. You don't have to seek a man to ask about God...simply ask God.

[LizaLavolta]

I am praying for and listening for my husband. I met someone who was obsessed with the idea of the one and used that and God as a scapegoat for his CLEAR bad behavior in relationships and his previous marriage. I saw him get super stressed over the idea of 'the one' ...and the spirit of that reminded me a lot of what I used to encounter in the new age. God is not a God of confusion. Focus on drawing near to God and his will- pray to be a wife (or husband). Pray for your future spouse..walk in the Spirit and you will know them when you see him. I believe God placed the desire to be a wife on my heart so I am confident that I will be. :) But Satan wants to whisper to God's children, "It's too late, etc." so we rush into the wrong thing and accept a counterfeit. BE STILL and God will go before you!

[lightshiner]

I was hesitant to like this one until you clarified what “the one” meant to you. Yes you said it wonderfully. The one isn’t the person God has for you that you’ll never have problems with or makes you “feel a certain special way” since we know that emotions can be tracked to just about anyone. What God DOES have for us who are called to marry is the right person for the right season that will help us accomplish God’s will for our lives. Not saying emotions and decision making is irrelevant here, but rather that the ultimate purpose of every marriage is for both parties to enhance each other and bring each other closer to their God given destiny, glorifying Him in the process. The more we live on our knees, the more we see who God has for us

[ogcripping]

The "one" that accepts you for who you are in (Christ ofcourse) will be your soulmate

[misskat]

God speaks to us in so many ways. I’ve never dreamed about my husband but I will know who he is. Keep in step with the Holy Spirit and you will know!

[gabbi]

If God’s will is sovereign, then you could say that God “determines” who’s going to Hell. But the Bible says in 2 Peter 3:9 that it’s not God’s will that any man should perish. If sending people to Hell is not God’s will, yet people still go there, then that means that people send themselves there. God talks about us having free will all throughout the Bible. Just because He knows what’s going to happen doesn’t mean that He orchestrates all of those events. Similarly, I believe that people have the choice to do what they want and marry who they want, even if that’s not the person that God had in mind. If one person chooses not to marry the one that God has chosen for him/her (thereby leaving their God-chosen potential spouse without a husband/wife) I believe that God can choose someone else for the person whose original future husband/wife is now taken.

The Bible says that God can turn any situation around for good. We mess us and God re-routes us. That’s what I believe. Like you said, it’s complicated and it would take more studying but with the dynamics of free choice, I don’t see how God could possibly get His way in everything. At the end of time, God’s plans will ultimately prevail (eternal bliss for those who chose Jesus), but in this life and right here in a sinful world, people constantly make the wrong choices. If people can choose to make the wrong choices in so many areas, why would choosing the wrong spouse be any different?

Edit: In John 14:30 the Bible says that Satan is the god of this world...in the same verse the Bible does says that Satan has no power over Him (Jesus), nonetheless, Satan has some kind of rule over this world. Satan can’t control believers but the influence of sin is still there and as long as someone is sinning (disobedience is a sin as well) that person is not walking in God’s will because God hates sin. I’ve never been on board with the Calvinist view because I feel that the Bible has numerous examples of people choosing to do their own thing and facing the dire consequences. But the hope is that God can transform the lives of those who turn to Him and rely wholeheartedly on Him.

[amalianormil]

“A woman is bound to her husband as long as he lives. But if her husband dies, she is free to marry anyone she wishes, but he must belong to the Lord.”
‭‭1 Corinthians‬ ‭7:39‬ ‭

[gdj]

God is the best matchmaker but we stil have free will.

[AnonYmous-mwlc]

I've been with the one for 15 years, and believe me, the odds were stacked against us ever knowing each other that it took several huge barriers to be moved that ONLY God could have done it. There was no prayer, no faith, no desire to know the one. This was college and party time, yet we were meant to find each other like two magnets. We are imperfect for each other and come from different Christian denominations but we complement each other like a well oiled machine. You won't know it til years after you find the one: you'll recognize who, what, and how you got to meet and know the one, you will laugh and be shocked at how messy and MAYBE unChristian-like the whole process was. Depending how dense you are, God will literally use the least expected people and situations to impose His will. You're on His timeline and His stage, stick to the script.

[sandrajeanjunio]

I believe that God has predestined a spouse for those who are called for marriage. Maybe it's difficult to understand how things happen with the sovereign will of God and man's free will, but God said in His words - "Delight in me and I will give you the desires of your heart. For it is I who gave you those desires." Indeed God is sovereign and it's up to us to listen to Him or not if we want to be with the person He prepared for us.