The Dangers of Having No Friends

This is from this week's episode of the Subtle Art podcast. Check it out on my channel.

It's called, 7 Underrated Habits for a Better Life (and 7 Overrated Habits Too)

#markmanson #overrated #underrated

[ashishpandey]

"Being alone is a power very few people can handle".

[AnotherCamilo]

"People tend to overestimate their romantic relationships and underestimate their friendships"
This hits me close to home because i had, at least three friends, that cut me off at the time they got girlfriends. One of them kick me out from a party, in the middle of the night, just because his girlfriend arrived. The others were "always busy" with no time to spare.

[KVW]

There was a point in time when I had no friends to hang out with and was single. That was the worst time in my life. I spent many years single, but for the most part had a few friends I hung out with regularly. Those are some of my favorite times. For very brief moments, I had a significant other AND friends. Those are the best times, and I don't take them for granted.

[Checkered_Demon]

I have a bunch of friends and even family members who feel like once they get in a relationship they need to dump all their friends and be obsessed with their new partner and it’s wild to me

[tamagotchi]

Yeah, don't deprioritise friendships.. but people change, and sometimes we just have to accept that some friendships dissolve over time.. and making new friends who are down your alley can be extremely hard after a certain age..

I wouldn't consider "half decent" people friends.. well, they could be more like activity partners - situational seasonal, mutually benefiting partnerships that are okay as a remedy for lonliness or boredom.. some companionship just never goes beyond superficiality

[studyonly-udhb]

Actually we underestimate the power of being alone. I myself sometimes feel a little bit lonely cuz I don't have many friends, but with time I started enjoying it and actually it made me discover a lot of things about myself. Ofc we should communicate with each other cuz we're human, but we shouldn't be dependent on others. Plus when you're just with yourself, you don't get influenced by other's opinion and know the true you. So I prefer having few friends that I can be myself with than having a lot of ones but just faking my personality with.

[aaronroseman]

I have zero friends in living in LA, but I have my dog who is my absolute best friend. He’s way more of a friend than half of the people here!! In LA, no one is truly friends. You have some good times, see and talk 5 times a year, but that’s it. Hard times roll around and they’re nowhere to be found

[j.a.c]

Spot on with this video. Those people who dump all their friends for a relationship have left all their happiness in the hands of another. It will ultimately lead to disaster because one person can get burnt out. "Share you life with someone, don't live your life for them."

[eclecticd]

Ok, can we make some reels on how to make more friends. It becomes more difficult to make new friends as we get older, and I think everyone can agree.

[elgatomoscato]

I think I opted out of friendships because I saw the true faces of people around me. Two of my coworkers died, one was a suicide. When the one was still alive, they wouldn't skip a beat to slander him behind his back like a bunch of school kids, sometimes within earshot of him. They claimed to be community oriented and Christian, but treated those that weren't in their circle like complete garbage and their duality perplexes me, how you can have such a sunny face and a heart that's black as sin. I've also had friendships end over the dumbest shit, because pride mattered more. I had 2 friends that ended our friendships because they believed so strongly that Bernie Sanders was gonna swoop in and relieve them of their student loans, but I told them it wasn't coming. I think they took it defensively, like I was rooting against them when I'm strongly grounded in reality

[RevolutionNTty]

Maintaining a toxic relationship just to avoid being alone, besides being common sense, can be a logic that can be applied to everything and induce people to indulge. You can grow being alone or accompanied, it all depends on the stage of life you are in.

[ricliu]

People are draining. People are co-dependant. Solitary is strength.

[Lethargyca]

I think that is the reason I've been struggling so bad after my most recent breakup, well not so recent, it's been almost 4 months and I can't stop thinking about my ex bc I really don't have anybody else to talk besides my family. Working at home doesn't help either, feeling motivated is pretty hard if you're stuck only with your own thoughts.

[beatrizmedeirosnoleto]

The problem is getting half-decent friends. Having """friends""" is usually more trouble than being alone.

[Larstig]

After school I had no friends any more. Like 20 years ago?
And never had a romantic relationship in my life.
It is not people don't like me, and I like be social from time to time.

But I can live easily alone. But now I get older and see every one I know getting or having a relationship, the loneliness is getting there deep inside and it make me stronger to find someone.
I need to take away my mental hurdles and try to go for it.

Another thing is, I am a real introvert and diagnosed with ASD (light version of it).

[MattyLiam]

Hey Mark, love your content and literary material. You're definitely one of the best. But just to be clear, for some of us, social isolation isn't just okay for our health but essential for the continuance of our spiritual endevours. I'm by no means saying I'm enlighened, but I have found a peace and happiness that definitely go beyond human words, and my relationships have become vastly deeper and more meaningful when I do have to interact with the world occassionally. Not even saying my life has improved, but I was able to quit drinking, and improve my finances and credit score literally night and day. I don't need to do much more to maintain 100% contentment in life, other than just exist in my truest form, which ain't this damn body. I owe it all to copious amounts of social isolation.

[Pluralofvinylisvinyls]

As someone that’s lost every single friend to the opioid epidemic, I think most people take friendship for granted. If you still have your friends from high school, you’re blessed.

[wtfdivorce]

Lack of friendships is another aftershock of divorce.

[lunab.]

The data is a little depressing if you want friends but haven't been able to make any. Also, have you seen and heard some of the opinions out there that we are peer pressured to accept? Where are the original thoughts, or authentic thoughts for that matter? I would like friends, I just don't want to compromise my values just to agree with them.

[Aimless]

I don't have friends...i have 1 or 2 and even after them i feel lonely sometimes....i enjoy my own company....i get more time to study and study continuously without any distraction...there are some supporters