What is dissociation and how can I get out of it? Tips to help ground you

Dissociation is a disconnection from ourselves and or our surroundings. 
Dissociation happens on a spectrum. On the lower end of the spectrum, it can happen as daydreaming or zoning out. On the opposite side of the spectrum, it can look like Dissociative identity disorder, which used to be known as multiple personality disorder. In the middle of the spectrum are common dissociation experiences, known as depersonalization and derealization. 
 

In this video, we will discuss these forms of Dissociation, their symptoms, and why they happen. I will also give you a few tips on what you can do to help ground yourself and be more present.

00:00 Introduction
00:51 What is dissociation?
02:22 Why do I keep dissociating even when I am not in the traumatic environment?
03:15 Doesn't my mind know I am not in danger?
04:46 Is checking out a form of dissociation?
05:17 Derealization vs. Depersonalization
07:22 Maladaptive Daydreaming
08:06 Dissociative Amnesia
09:05 Dissociative Identity Disorder
10:30 Tips to help you stop dissociating
13:52 Final thoughts

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[qwertygun]

Thank you. I find this is the best, concise video on dissociation

[graceeee]

I’ve had depersonalization & derealization coming up on 3 years now, and I’m so terrified it will never go away. Out of those three years there has been about 5 times that have lasted 30 seconds to a minute where I feel real and alive. I can’t explain how magical it feels, it’s like little me is back. I think it’s going to last but before I know it I’m gone again. I just want to feel alive. I miss it so much. I don’t know what to do I’m almost 15 and this started when I was 12 I had a lot of traumatic times at that point and it’s like I fell asleep one day and never woke up from the dream. What if one day I’ll wake up and all my teen years will be gone. I just want to feel alive. I really miss it

[smidefix]

I cant remember any traumatic situation, yet only a few things feel real in my life. I never feel "awake and living"

[breakieattiffs]

I've had this since I was 12. I am now 37. I remember when it happened. Nothing has felt real again ever since

[ianbarbella]

I thought I was just stupid or crazy, but you explain how I feel exactly. Almost like I’ve told you. I often feel like the world around me is not real. I feel like it’s my first time seeing the world and I don’t know where I am I just know it’s not real. Much more often I experience people feeling like they’re not real people and almost like they’re video game characters or characters in a tv show. I’ve been listening to friends talk and suddenly remember they are real and we are friends that have a bond more and they aren’t just fake tv show characters. I also often find myself not in my own body and feeling like I’m watching my life happen through a screen almost like a tv show. I’m in control of my body but I know it’s not real and I exist outside of this “fake world”. I’m not sure I want it to go away. It’s almost comforting to feel like nothing is real and nothing exists, not sure I should feel that way.

[ZeCahli]

I’m dissociating and can’t snap out of it. 🥺 thank you for posting this I’ll try it

[crowolfe]

Thank you. I'm currently experiencing the longest episode of dissociation in decades, while also trying to finish a Master's thesis. I'm starting these exercizes right now.

[Sixdioz]

For me it’s subtle. In some ways it’s worse because I don’t realize I’m in it until the moments I’m out.

[glamourdarling]

I've been dissociating for years and only realized fairly recently. I also noticed last month that I am dissociating every time I go to the gym, it's frustrating because that was my safe space and now it feels like I need a new environment to shock the nervous system back. I feel out of my body.

[sharonjones]

Oh my goodness you know me!!! Raised in a house with narcissistic mother…enabler father. And yes I’m in a constant state of dissociation. I have such a good understanding now. Thank you…will follow your channel

[chrisjarmain]

I have been medically diagnosed with Dissociative Identity Disorder about 2 years ago.
The longest stretch of dissociation lasted for about 4 weeks. I remember nothing of what happened.
My best description of what it is roughly like is similar to driving a car. When its me like now, im driving. When another is also present, it's like im the passensger.
When they are fully in control (for whatever reason), it is as if i am in the boot of the car.
I hope this helps give a perspective of what it's like.
Dissociation is rough, but it is normal, like daydreams are normal.
You are worth it, you are loved, you can make it ❤️

[EmmA-lnhe]

One quick fix that helps me to get back to the surface when I get frustrated is wiping the inside of my ears and nostrils with cold water. It immediately brings me closer to the surface. But it definitely does not solve the problem long term, it just helps to keep me from getting aggravated with myself from not doing the basic maintenance of my every day life (I have developed diogenes syndrome from dissociation).
So applying cold water helps me snap out of it enough to find the focus on my environment to get stuff done, but I never finish as confronting the diogenes is a trigger itself so they kind of feed into each other (dissociation makes me neglect my environmental tidiness and hygiene and cleaning makes me realize how dirty it is which sends me into a shame spiral that pushes me right back into derealization).
Thank you for the long term tips.
I started seeing a specialized therapist (I feel sorry for people in the US who can't afford help) and I can't wait to start doing emdr and brainspotting with her because I'm really tired of dragging myself through life, experiencing shame and guilt as primary emotions 😓

[LOVE_ALL_AROUND]

Wow...super helpful. Especially dissociative amnesia. Now I understand! I have no memory of the more intense experiences when molested. I know these events happened but now I don't remember and I really don't want to. Thanks so much for this content!

[jamesfrancis]

This is pure healing gold.. the format of fantastic psycho education followed by useful tools that can make a difference is incredibly helpful. Thank you

[nate]

There is something in the way you present things that makes it easier to understand and process than many of the other places the information has been presented to me. There are no words for how valuable that is. I have had so much difficulty with getting help because of the way I interpret the definitions given.

I've only recently started seriously exploring if I am autistic or not, and it has only been through people with a similar ability to make things relatable that i've been able to actually understand what is meant when X is said.

[smokeyjoe]

I've been dissociating since my child hood but it then went away in my teenage yrs..it then come bk when I went through some traumatic events In my 20s and it's just getting worse by the day..im early 40 now and I'm always in a world of my own and i feel spaced out almost lyk I'm floating and this is every day so i have no breaks from it..I find it incredibly hard to have a conversation with anyone as I zone out so I dnt hear a thing they say..its really getting to me now and I feel lyk I'm not gona come bk from this and that scares the hell out of me..I have been waiting on a mental health worker in UK for 3yrs now and that's no exaggeration..I dnt no what to do as I cnt carry on life lyk this as what it's doing to my self confidence and my overall mind control is really scary..I wanna be able to interact with ppl and talk to them but I cnt get in the moment propley and if I do try and look them in the face and listen, it just dosent seem real and my brain wnt allow what there saying to be absorbd..plz help

[corinevanivy]

Sometimes I like to read about dissociation cause even I don't have a dissociation disorder when I was 12/13 years old I remember telling my mom it took me some seconds to remember my age sometimes even say my own name sounded strange to me, the truth is, I was subconsciously trying to dissociate. I don't have a history of physical aggression but being mentally abused was enough for me to develop these symptoms, my father is mentally abusive and both my parents used to act as I wasn't allowed to be angry or sad about what he had done to me just because "he was my dad", it put me in a "toxic cage" feeling a lot of emotions at the same time in a hard level and in other periods trying to be detached from them, that's why sometimes I can't recall details of bad things he did to me or feel the truly emotions of it, cause "your suffering isn't valid if it's your dad who harmed you".

[thescienceofwellbeinguk]

Thank you so much. The practical advice of looking at my hands and touching things makes so much sense to me. The daydreaming coping strategy is definitely something I used when I was a child. Less so now. I've been suffering from de-realisation for over 20 years ❤

[lotuslotus]

Thank you so much, been doing this forever due to trauma and family problems ❤️ can you please make a video on how to cope in a healthy way when you're still in a toxic environment?

[elaineyoung]

You explained this so well. I'm sending this to my client so she can get a better grasp of dissociation.