Can we be Happy without Friends? | The Social Minimalist

A minimalist lifestyle concerns itself with minimizing the number of material resources we need to be satisfied. A tremendous benefit of this approach is the reduced cost of living. The less we need, the more time, money, and energy we save. So, can we also apply minimalism to our social connections to gain the same benefits? Can we be happy with a minimal amount of friends, or even without friends? This video explores the benefits and downsides of friendship, the current state of friendships, and if we actually need friends.

The Social Minimalist | Can we be Happy without Friends?

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#minimalism #solitude #nofriends

00:00 - Intro
01:35 - The decline of friendship
05:26 - The cost of friendship
08:05 - The misery of bad friends
10:38 - Do we need friendship?

[TheLastProzacNation]

Most people don’t actually have “friends”, they have “people with whom to go out and have fun”. A friend is someone who loves and cares about you - they will help you emotionally, financially, psychologically whenever they can. They will lift you up when you are down and they will be like family. Anything other than that is not friendship. However, nowadays people call anyone a friend, even those people who are one step away from being an enemy.

[madame__bizarre]

As a physically disabled person and also an introvert who has only one close friend, I think that it is possible to be (almost) friendless and happy. For me, most of human interactions are emotionally draining anyway, and I'd rather have one true friend than keep on dealing with toxic people.

[mihaelaclaudiap..]

“My goal is no longer to get more done, but rather to have less to do.”
― Francine Jay

[jaimereynolds]

Haven't had a friend in about 8 years, and it is so nice. No drama, no stress, no having to worry about someone being boo hoo because I had to cancel plans or can't go out one night. Happy as a clam 🙂

[barajasjalisco]

I’m 40 single and no kids. I used to feel
Lonely before the pandemic. Opposite to most people 2020 was the best year of my life I learned to live, travel, and go anywhere by myself. I love to live and be alone. The best feeling is when I meditate and I live a simple life. I don’t even need to worry or think too much my life is better than never. I still meeting people when I go out. Even though I find people with similar interests and lifestyles I still prefer to be alone most of the time. I used to crave deep conversations now I don’t really care I can accept any type of conversation and I know even if I don’t agree with it. I know that I will go back home and I will just let it go. Sometimes I just need a little more freedom to travel around the world that will increase my quality of life but even if it that doesn’t happen. I’m living my best life alone and happy. Happy solitude everyone

[janberry]

I'm 72 and have been single 22 years now [without even a date]. I've had the freedom to move around and change jobs before retiring. My daughter asked just the other day if I was happy as I have no friends. I said "I have You Tube and can go to England, France, Germany, Greece, anywhere in the world daily. I can explore any subject. When I want a pet, I can watch dogs and cats. And I can go to Facebook and check on the family. My house is warm in the winter and cool in the summer. I have enough to live on if I don't go hog wild spending and don't need diamonds and furs. I am happy. I have enough. And that is enough.

[peculiarlittleman]

"Before you decide your depressed or have low self-esteem, consider the possibility that you are surrounded by assholes"- Sigmund Freud

[falkonjenova]

My life improved dramatically when I gave up trying to have friends. The "friends" I had in the past were immature, toxic, and a bad influence on me. I have no friends right now and am much happier, fulfilled, and more peaceful than I use to be. I would happily accept any new friends who share the same values and interests as me, but I don't feel the need to seek them out. My parents think its unhealthy that I don't have friends, but they've seen my life before and can't explain why it's so much better now. When you're around friends often you're much more likely to get swept up in their egos and dysfunctional patterns, but when you're alone often you're able to grow and evolve into a more natural and better human being more efficiently.

[Me]

Better no friends than bad friends. I’m rarely lonely…and never bored…when I’m alone.

[blankearth]

For those out there who feel like they have no friends, who feel rejected by the world, it doesn’t necessarily mean that there is anything wrong with you. It just means that the universe wants you to be your own bestest friend

[gwwayner]

I'm 71 and I remember the last line of the movie 'Stand By Me'; 'You never have friends again like you had when you were 12'. As the years go by it just becomes increasingly difficult to trust people. Sad to say.

[toughsoftieyogi]

"It's better to be alone than to wish you were."
- I don't know who said this but this helped me maintain social minimalism.

[daniellegardner]

I love my solitude, wouldn't trade it for all the "friends" in the world. When I am alone, my life is simple, orderly, low maintenance and peaceful; as soon as other people get involved with their opinions and expectations, that's when the drama and the problems start. It's amazing to me how emotionally needy and codependent many people are - I just don't have the bandwidth for all of that and I certainly don't need or even want validation from other people.

[jazmo]

I have lived alone for over 40 years and have never minded being on my own. I'm glad I came across this video. I find that most people only want to be your friend if they can get something out of you. I have found that when I have allowed someone in, I have ended up paying for it. I no longer trust anyone. When I have trusted, I have been let down or stolen from. It's just not worth it. I like the phrase Social Minimalist. I can chat to people in the shops or on the bus or whenever I go somewhere that other people gather, safe in the knowledge that, that is as far as the interaction will go. I don't need to know their names or where they came from because I will probably never see them again.

[purelight]

During the Depression the elderly I once worked for said they got rid of the people who claimed they were friends but were only around to leach food or 'borrow' things they never returned. So they kicked them out of their lives, became happier learning to mend, grow a garden, fix things & only keep in their lives people who bartered for goods & services. Books were their friends, flowers were their friends & some animals became their friends. I don't trust anyone who just has to be with others all the time. It's like they never grew up. That's the beauty of adulthood. You know you are one when being alone feels wonderful!

[MarkDavidMcCoskey]

Solitude, walks on the beach, soothing ambient music, have become My Life.
Simple, peaceful, content.

[daw]

My mother told me that if we are lucky we have one "true friend" in our friends if we are extremely else will simply be "associates".

[israfaeldari]

I don't have friends, but I'm so happy. I occupy my time with reading books, work, jogging, travel, meditation and of course music and films.
If you're desperate for social or social status; you can be happy without them. Trust me.

[Soberdosh]

I lost 99% of my friends after getting sober, 1 stayed by me every step of the way & has been my only hope to remain happy. It’s unbelievably lonely but not impossible, learning day by day & constantly interacting with customers and coworkers helps tremendously too

[CrumblyTriscuits]

I really needed this video today along with everyone's comments on the topic, they are incredibly validating and comforting. I have always valued my solitude and peace and always knew that I needed it as a self care method. People try to throw it in your face that you don't have friends, implying there's something wrong with you, for me, it's about self preservation and self care as I have yet to meet a friend who is as easy going as I am. So I actually do have one friend at least... Me! 💜