Four Types of Unhealthy Family Structures: Disengaged and Enmeshed

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In this informative clip from Tim's series on Healthy Supports, he explores the four types of unhealthy family structures that can harm emotional well-being. These include rigidly disengaged families, where members are emotionally distant; chaotically disengaged families, marked by instability; rigidly enmeshed families, where boundaries are overly controlling; and chaotically enmeshed families, characterized by blurred boundaries and confusion. Understanding these unhealthy dynamics can help viewers recognize their own family situations and work toward healthier relationships.

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[rayrayrayrayray]

Thank you Tim!!! It was militant control for me. My mum passed away and I’m cleaning her house and going over every mistake I made, wishing I could have made her life better.

[RH-ulbc]

My family as a child fell into none of these. It would be interesting to go back and look at my family with adult eyes and see how it was. I dont have many memories. Everyone told me i was so quiet when we would be out socially. Its because i was an only child until 7 and basically ignored. Neither parent engaged me in conversation. I thank God for our childless neighbor who i thought lovingly as a 3rd grandmother. Neither parent had a clue what this woman gave to me as a child.

[mnoxman]

Father was a Juvenile probation officer. Everything was all about protecting him from being embarrassed. I was treated like a Ken doll by both parents. Brought out to show and tell but never to connect. It is all about the image and never about the substance.

[divine]

I grew up in a chaotic disengaged family

[Heiconia]

Such a great way to organize and describe these types! This was so helpful to learn, thank you.🙏

[TheLookingGlassAU]

I had a chaotic disengaging father and an emeshing mother.

[hokeypokeyahandicapablebul]

To anyone who will read this. You're Strong, Beautiful and worth helping yourself. ❤ Giving ourselves grace and love is hard to do, but you can do this! One step forward, may your day be blessed with light and ❤
Hokey Pokey a Handicapable Bulldog

[Sally-ihls]

Rigid is do this at certain time, certain ways, rules rules and rules, everything in its place always
Chaotic is no rules, no structure, fighting, messy house, no organization, that’s what I think

[shermarkle]

We were all of those at different times. You never knew what you were going to get.

[AF-mmhb]

Got me fucked up Tim. Good insight. Made my heart hurt

[libraveggie]

Pretty sure my family was a mix of all four somehow. New fights every day between everybody all because the boss didn't get her way.

My mother is a horrendous woman who criticizes and degrades anyone for doing anything different or not wanting to do something. And god help you if you say no. (Im amazed we still had walls with hiw much crap she hurled at us)

Both parents were happy to do their own things for days on end, and so were me and my sibling, but don't you dare say no to doing stuff together.

And to top it off every single day would be a new emotion. Hell it'd be a new one every half hour sometimes. Sometimes both parents hate you. Sometimes they were perfectly happy with us. Sometimes my own sibling hated me because of something i did that just so happened to send mom over the edge.

So uh.... yeah. TLDR. Familes Suck lol

[thinker]

I think i grew up rigidly disengaged and pretty sure i married a chaotically enmeshed. Your prediction seem accurate about their characteristics. Can someone describe the characteristics of a relationship like that?

[themasculinismmovement]

I don't understand the difference between rigid and chaoitc

[NMITP]

My family is my concern. Thanks. Appreciate that.