How to Handle Uncomfortable Questions You REALLY Don't Want to Answer in English

Have you been asked an uncomfortable, awkward, inappropriate, or rude question? Learn how to handle uncomfortable questions you REALLY don't want to answer. We'll discuss strategies you can use to confidently respond to uncomfortable questions in English, including finding out the reason why the person is asking, responding with polite, direct language, using humor, and explaining how the question makes you feel. You'll learn the right intonation to use when dealing with uncomfortable questions so that you can communicate your meaning clearly. These tips will help you avoid answering uncomfortable questions and enable you to change the subject.

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0:00 Introduction
1:47 Consider Whether You Want to Continue the Conversation
2:17 Ask Them Why They Want to Know
3:58 Handle Uncomfortable Questions with Direct, Polite Language
6:20 Clearly State That the Question is Rude or Inappropriate
8:41 Change the Subject

🤗 I’m Kim, and I’m here to help you express your meaning and your message through stress, intonation, and how you you use your voice and breath.

In other words, you’ll learn how to communicate clearly and confidently in American English so that people will definitely understand (and *listen* to) what you have to say.

📢 Want to improve how you sound, but not sure where to start?

These videos will help you find your voice in English:

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[luciimetcalfe]

I never knew this is what I needed to hear to cure 90% of my social anxiety. Thank you so much.

[Musicandfilms]

I always find myself surrounded by people how ask me akward personal questions to make me feel unconfortable, I used to end up insulting them or figthing with them, this video helped me a lot, thank you( sorry for my bad English)

[antoinettea]

Kim is not only an English teacher, but also has an excellent understanding of psychology and life coaching. Thank you Kim!

[Londya]

I'm a native english speaker and this was so helpful! Easily the best video on this topic. Been looking for a video like this for a while. Thank you for the concrete examples for what to say.

[KimsLantern]

One that I came up with is ‘That’s a very personal question to ask someone you don’t know.’ Lol. Great video!!! That’s so much for this!!!

[jjl]

Such a thorough video about deflection and handling these situations. I’m a native English speaker and this was still useful!!!

[TEE]

This video nails it ...in so many ways ...always quality presentation from Kim

[hirokosaito]

I get too many awkward personal questions on social media. It helped me a lot. I am glad I found you. Thank you very much.

[cptcedag]

Hey Kim, this video is great. Thank you!

[raya]

ive always struggled with this! ive never wanted to come off as rude or insecure/defensive about a question but a lot of times I just dont wanna answer because its none of their business -especially someone im not very close to. A lot of people just want to get information to gossip. In the past after answering  a question id feel resentful towards that person  for making me feel uncomfortable and feeling obligated to answer their uncomfortable question but then I grew the F up and realized I am under no obligation what so ever to answer peoples questions no matter what that question is or who the person is.  The main ones I hate are- how old are you? and why are you still single? and do you ever want kids? do you ever feel pressured to have kids? etc-ughh  so my response is really dependent on the situation and person. I either flat out ignore it and not reply if its social media or a texting convo or ask a question right back at them like have you found the one yet? or use humour like -that's the million dollar question or wouldn't you like to know or when I know ill let you know. I also can be quite blunt if need be. Example how old are you if you dont mind me asking? my response I do mind you asking. Period end of story. So really depends on the situation and who is asking but I'm getting so good at it and its alleviated a lot of anxiety for me in social situations because I always felt there was some judgement with  certain questions. Sometimes ill just be completely honest. Example -do you want kids? my answer -ive never really seen myself being a mom, though, I do love kids and I love being an aunty so maybe one day.With growth and maturity ive realized I dont owe people an explanation or justification for anything in my life. They dont pay my bills or do anything for me so why allow them to make me feel uncomfortable or judged.I appreciate you addressing this topic though because no matter who you are or where you go you are going to encounter curious people with questions. Some people are just genuinely interested in getting to know you better or know how handled something to help them in a similar situation but again you need to carefully assess that person who they are and whether they are coming from a good place or not.

[luisalbertomendez]

Well said! Thank you! I got a very useful information through your video!

[stravagantares]

Useful tips, this was a challenge I faced and got me frustrated at myself. Thanks for the many examples of answers. 👍🏼

[AmandaMuu]

My primary languages are English and Spanish, and I live in the United States, where most people know one or both languages. I can't escape annoying personal questions until I can work from home and be a hermit. I am just trying to figure out how to avoid people's questions that I don't want to answer without getting fired

[gracieallan]

English is my first language, but this was still such a huge help! Thank you😊

[MsCocoaCyril]

Thank God for YouTube and your video. I am 46 and I have struggled with this all of my life. It has caused me to recluse. But I don’t want to hide I want to go out enjoy life and events and let getting to know people happen organically. People don’t speak about the event or task at hand but get personal I could care less about strangers personal business and it pisses me off I get so angry. Most of the time I answer and then I hate myself for doing so. They bombard me with questions. I am going to write every response down and practice because as sure as I am on here someone will challenge me with questions I don’t want to answer.

[desertprincess]

I like ur answers and I pick one of them to answer my enemies 😂 thank you it works

[Roshea]

Excellent & to the point video. I love when examples are provided!

[stever]

I usually answer jokingly “ can’t answer that because I’m being followed by a monitoring spirit who uses different people to gather information “ then smile and laugh . That usually throws them for a loop .

[muminabegum]

I was in a situation last week where my older sister asked me why my periods are irregular and when I’m due to have my next one 😬😬😬
Then alongside that, she asked me if my periods have always been irregular.
I then started shaking out of embarrassment that I asked her why she wanted to know.
I then decided to leave the room to read a book as a way of taking my mind off it.
Next time this happens, I will say something like:
I’d rather not talk about that!
I prefer not to talk about that!
It’s none of your business!
Or,
This topic is too personal to discuss!
Thank you for this wonderful video 👍🏿

[dgilmour]

BEST ENGLISH CHANNEL EVER. Thanks Kim, for all the tips you give us every day!