Different Identities in Different Languages - Inside The Strange Bilingual Mind [Esoteric Saturdays]

Some bilingual people report feeling like they're are two different people depending on the language they speak. Why is that?
Why do bilingual people (especially children) feel reluctant to 'demonstrate' their language abilities?
What's the difference between being genuinely bilingual and merely being competent in an additional language?
Today's video delves a little deeper into the decidedly odd psychological experience of the bilingual mind.

Thumbnail art: AGSANDREW/SHUTTERSTOCK

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[angelocasting]

This is fascinating, and resonates with me in a way that is similar, yet different.
I'm not bilingual, but I'm autistic. In order to go through my daily life, I unconsciously developed various "masks." The masks help camouflage my autistic traits, and allow me to fit in in situations where I'm not comfortable. For example, Work Angelo is quiet and focused on getting his work done, but Home Angelo is more boisterous, foul-mouthed, and focused on making his partner laugh and feel good. These two "masks" don't mix well, so when my partner visited me at work once, she was confused about how I was acting, until I explained why the differentiation is necessary for me.
Thank you for posting this, it's definitely going to give me another interesting angle to analyze myself from

[naturasophia]

I find this video to be outsandingly importat, one of the best descriptions of the bilingual experiance I've come across. As a bilingual person, I noticed long ago that my English speaking persona will only 'come out' fully when there are no Hebrew speaking people around, or when abroad - outside of Israel where I live. It does really feel like two different personalities which are outwardly oriented. I'm diagnosed as dyslexic and dysgraphic, ADHD and so on, and it never felt right. Your video helped me make a bit more sense of it. thank you so much for putting it into words.

[Aphlexion]

I was born in the US but grew up in Mexico, I moved by myself to the US two years ago (I'm 22) and it has been really difficult to learn the language because there is a lot of Spanish speaking people here in LA. Because I learned English mostly due to IT classes I can feel how I'm more technical (at least in the field that I'm studying) when I speak English compared to when I speak Spanish. Also all my occult reading and learning is in English :)

[lidu]

This is utterly fascinating.
We have a saying (in Czech), that goes "How many languages you speak, that many times you are human, " [Kolik jazyků umíš, tolikrát jsi člověkem.]
I have never understood it. I have never connected myself to the language I speak. Even if I speak my native language, it sometimes feels like I have to "translate" my thoughts into language. Very often I think words that I later find out, do not exist.

I did not wait until the end to comment, so I don't know where exactly it leads, but my input would be that perhaps it is not only that language shapes personality, but it is our personality that dictates _what a language is to us._

[awkwardandrew]

It’s always comforting to hear about how dissociation happens even in some pretty normal situations. This is not very related, but I’d love to see a video of you talking about tulpas. What they are and how to create one. Thank you for another deep, thoughtful video!

[TeiaKennedy]

Yes!! I love the “operating system” analogy. Brilliant. I’ve never been able to explain that phenomenon as a French/English speaker. Thank you 😊

[sarahjensen]

Some of us only got the language expansion pack. Thank you for explaining this experience, which fits what I've observed in others, but hadn't really understood.

[sillywilly]

I'm now wondering if this will help me with language learning, creating an alter ego.🤔
This is so interesting and informative, thank you.

[lenacally]

I can relate to this from both my own perspective growing up and my career working with autistic children. For me it's not just the verbal side of things but also my hearing seems to have dual processing 🤔. Working with children I also found that some who were having speech problems when I used different languages they responded even though their environments were English speaking. Their parents would check back through their ancestry and sure enough they had french / spanish etc ancestors. Happy your son is receiving good support.

[VolferVanBuster]

I am personally fascinated about how languages influence how we think. My situation is somewhat of an inverse of what your son is going through funnily enough. I am originally Polish and I started learning English quite early in my life. Never had any English speekers in my "offline" life, so for a while I concidered "Volfer", my online identity to be my English self and <<insert real life name here>> as its Polish counterpart. Since then similarly to you I managed to find a fitting middle ground that is just "me" more or less. Even though I still find myself more outgoing and talkative when speaking English.

As the time went on i became interested in how certain concepts are easier for me to express in one languege then another. Not only because some of these concepts i learned from english speakers (the whole occult world is a good example), but also because between languages similar worlds might have slight differences which when piled up can change the way you think quite drastically.
An example that I like is the english word "creepy". There is technically no good direct translation for this one into Polish, so much so that it was just absorbed into Polish youths vocaullary in its original form. That's how useful it is.
The point is that without the word "creepy" you can't really have an easy access to the concept of "creepy" and the more words from different languages you know the bigger your library of concepts gets.
Orwels "1984" and Heinleins "Stranger in strange land" talk about these topic at length and are a reason I got interested in it and in turn why i feel compelled to write this lengthy comment.

Now for the fun part. The occult.
My introduction to this world was through TAROT. When learning the meaning of individual cards I quickly realised that indeed what I am doing is learning a language. The "library of concepts" got updated by 72 (and another 72 if we count reversals) new words each very complex and packed with meaning changing yet again how I look at the world that surrounds me. Similar experience I had much later when I started to learn about the tree of life and yet similar experiences I expect to find as I continue my practice.

As I said these are thoughts that had bothered me for a while now and this is probably the best place to put them :)

[oldpondfrog]

What a marvelous, inspiration, thoughtful and personal discussion to share. Once again I'm going to have re rewind and listen again. And this is often more than once.

I'm far from Bilingual; or multilingual but am finding my own little explorations (entirely alone) in language a supreme joy.

I thank you. Bedankt; tak; gracias; merci.

With practice and renewed intent this will certainly make me more thoughtful and considerate of others as so many of your videos often do.

[bendthebow]

Apparently when you learn a second language you actually grow new grey and white brain matter. It's thought give children a learning advantage. And there's evidence it improves your memory in adulthood and old age

[quorraquar]

Being Panamanian growing up in the US. When I speak Spanish I feel and think differently. I dream in mostly English but have spoken Spanish in my dreams on rare occasions. I prefer my solitary spells in Spanish and coven spells in English. I feel like two different people in those situations. I relate to your son's experience. This video came at a timely manner.

🌿💜💜💜🌿

[lex]

This is so interesting! I studied Spanish in college, and taught part time for a while when I was doing an MA in Spanish, and in the pedagogy class we had to take we learned about a thing called "affective filter" which makes it sort of emotionally or psychologically difficult for someone to learn a 2nd language, and some of it is due to a person's sense of identity. The more fixed or rigid your identity as an English speaker (or speaker of whatever), the more difficult it is to acquire a 2nd language. You have to be able to see yourself as a multilingual person. It sounds like your son actually split himself into two people. One monolingual in Polish and one monolingual in English. Very interesting, and I'd never heard of that before.

[maximusatlas]

I actually associate with this quite a lot. I am Puerto Rican but my family has Spanish, Italian and Hawaiian roots. So it's quite interesting that as I grew up I learn Spanish, Italian and English without putting much effort but had a hard time talking to people even if I knew the language. Currently I am 25 and married. My wife is American and I know Spanish, Italian, English and Greek. My wife often times has mentioned that I have different personalities when I speak Italian and Spanish. She says I am more "Fatherly" when I speak Spanish and when I speak English I am more "Rowdy". It's only recently that I noticed myself. I find this psychological aspect very interesting especially since I work in Security in a place where I have to speak multiple languages by default on a daily basis.

[danielaarenas]

I was born on a Spanish speaking country and I became interested in learning English from an early age.
I was fascinated when you mentioned about this switch which was turned on for one laguage or the other, because the same thing happens to me!
What I haven't analysed though is if I feel as a different person when speaking English than when speaking Spanish.

[thewizardofawes]

Fascinating, Denis! And I believe that the experience of having more than one personality, whether linguistic or cultural, can also take place in a monolingual cultural framework. This musing of yours reminded me of when I was about 7 years old: I remember staying as often as I could in the backyard of my house ‘staring at nothing’ and trying to understand what was happening to me, because I realized that “another I” was taking over me, I mean, I was realizing that I was taken over by an entirely personality different from what I really was, as if it were some kind of spirit possession, a concept I didn't have at the time of course. Anyway, that's pretty interesting isn't it?

[josie_posie]

Love everything about this. For someone who teaches English to non-native speakers yet only knows the one language (although many dialects) this was insightful. Also, to tune into the frequency of any youngster, let alone one who is spectrum-adjacent, right where they are...that's the best. More remarkable is how you articulate it. Very thoughtful. Thanks for sharing.

[gannicus]

Fantastic topic Denis. I am fluent in French, but not bilingual. Many do not understand the distinction. I look in awe at bilinguals as they can easily meander in and out of the two; i.e code switching.

[GabrielaLevi]

Loved this - as a bi-lingual I relate strongly. The funny childhood memories of waking up/ being tired and accidentally saying something to a family member in the "wrong" language and panicking internally why the "wrong me" popped up 😄