The ONE Thing You Must Remember BEFORE You Go Running Back To Him - Matthew Hussey, Get The Guy

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In this week's episode of LOVELife, Tika worries whether she made the right decision leaving her relationship. We discuss why it’s so scary to break it off and why we cling on to bad relationships far longer than we should.

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[gsgarciag]

"Someone I'm going to spend my life with is not someone I need to persuade to invest in me, or lookout for my needs." Awesome, Matthew :)

[amateur_bug]

three weeks into my breakup; every time I feel it creeping back up, I pop on hussy.

[Sarah-esqf]

Don't let the pain convince you you were wrong.

[matcha_mage]

"The fact that you like him and the fact that you care about him is why you feel some pain. But that pain and liking him and caring about him and caring about him in certain ways -- none of that makes him the guy that you should spend your life with." That is so profound. I'm going through a similar situation and of course you still love them and miss them, but people often forget that sometimes just loving someone isn't enough, and that loving yourself and putting yourself first is much more important.

[sabinahusic]

I was in a similar situation for almost five years, waiting for him to get it together. If you're doing the same, stop. If you wait for a person like that, you'll be waiting forever. The moment you leave them, they will start getting their life together. By the time they do, you will realize they weren't right for you in the first place, and you'll wish them the best, but not with you. :) Good luck to everyone going through this, you'll get to the other side soon, give yourself time!

[mariaelda]

1. It might get worse before it gets better and that's OKAY. that's expected.
2. you make excuses and view the relationship better than it actually was.
3. you suddenly become territorial because you dont want him to go to someone else.
3. you dont have to look for someone better, just someone better for YOU
4. i DON'T have to pusuade the RIGHT guy for me to do things for me.
5. IT SHOULD NOT BE THIS DIFFICULT WITH THE RIGHT PERSON
6. Don't let the pain (of leaving) convince you that it was wrong. you can feel pain too even with the wrong person.

And I could go on and on with all of the things that he said that hit me in the head! out of the many videos he has done that spoke to me, this one spoke the loudest, it practically YELLED at me!!

So when i find myself missing him, questioning our break up, wondering if he has someone else, getting scared of not finding someone like him (which is a bad idea becauae if my next is someone like him, we will have the same ending!!), enyertaining his pathetic attempt to reunite; i listen to this video to REMIND me that i dont need to waste more time to spend for him. because even if we are not together, everytime he enters my mind, everytime i look at our pics (which i should delete by the way!!) its time i could have spent working on myself or to put myself out there! grieve for the loss and then MOVE ON because time keeps ticking away.

[Emilyspeace]

I love the way he speaks with such understanding and empathy, it's just great. He really acknowledged she's hurting. Sometimes all someone needs is the acknowledgement of their pain.
Great video, really needed this today.

[peachsmoochies]

"That someone I'm going to spend my life with, is not someone I need to persuade to invest in me, or to look out for my needs."

[sloganfreesociety]

11:40 - “It is really, really hard even to lose the wrong person...”

[lilsis]

Fundamental Truth: "Someone I'm gonna spend the rest of my life with is NOT someone I need to persuade to invest in me or to look out for my needs." Thank you so much Matthew. I absolutely appreciate that he talked about the fact that in the real world, the credits don't just roll and everything's great.. we all go through the rollercoaster of the process.

[Sah]

It would be so interesting to hear people call in and do a follow up on how things went after taking Matthew's advice.

[mssummerrose]

it is hard to lose the wrong person b/c it is hard to admit that 1. you made a mistake, 2. that the other person didn't love you, and 3. that you tried to "buy" the other person's love and commitment with your sacrifices (and even like that it didn't work, that sucks, right ? ;)

[jessicas]

I change his name in my phone to the reason. So if he calls or when I want to, I see the reason it didn't work. Love your work Matt, thank you ✨

[abeille]

"it wont be this difficult." 100% agree. THANK YOU, MATT!

[notinspiredatall]

I just walked away from a 5 yr relationship....1 week ago, today I'm feeling specially sad, and confused.
I know deep down that we needed to take the decision, but I loved him with everything I've got, which makes it harder.

I'll update you if you want to know how everything turns out 😭❤

[verenah.]

I've also been in the same situation. But I made the choice to get back together with my ex boyfriend 3 times, because the pain was so overwhelming that I thought he must be the right guy. I guess he also missed me (at least a bit) but the effort he put in was usually quickly fainting. Only after the third break-up and altogether 6 years later and a few psychotherapy sessions it dawned on me that he might actually not be the right guy for me. Now I sometimes see his posts on social media and I guess he still has not changed - although it I still miss him sometimes I am so glad I am out of this relationship. Great video, Matthew!!

[Sarah-esqf]

Wow this is some of the greatest advice I've ever heard. And I'm 62 years old.

[endyan]

Yes really hurts even you losing the wrong people in your life but take it for lesson life and be careful for the next step in the future... When the wrong leave your life, the right things start to happen.

[BBC.]

Don't get used to emotional abuse

[steppentofortune]

Insecure people want security. BE the security, and then you will attract the man that reflects that.