Which Chaos God Should You Worship?

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Many gods, many choices. Which one to worship?

0:00 - Intro
1:27 - Brilliant Sponsorship
3:29 - Khorne
7:08 - Tzeentch
10:15 - Nurgle
13:40 - Slaanesh
17:06 - Malal
19:38 - Hashut
21:12 - Necoho
22:36 - Zuvasin
23:17 - Chaos Gods of Law/Order
25:41 - Nuffle
26:37 - Conclusion
27:12 - I Don't Get It

Music:
Kevin Macleod - Sneaky Snitch
Sunless Sea - Wolfstack Docks
FTL: Faster Than Light - MilkyWay (Explore), Engi (Explore), Mantis (Explore), Rockmen (Explore)
Age of Mythology - Chocolate Outline, Hoping for Real Betterness, Flavor Cats, Slaysenflite

[slueepy]

"Do not rank the evils, for you may be tempted towards kinship with the least."

[nazarasaid]

Slaanesh:
"you have to seek perfection"
Tzeentch:
"hou have to seek knowledge"
Nurgle:
"you have to seek happiness"
Khorne:
"you have to seek strength"
Malal:
"Here's some powers, go punch a daemon through the face"

[tomtriska]

Fusion of Slaanesh and Tzeentch chance to be a chaos spawn by end of week 1 but that 0.00001% chance for sexy wizard is too good to pass up.

[dolphinboi-playmonsterranc]

Khorne is probably the best one. Truth, honor, self improvement, what's there to hate?

"Good follower, will you go fetch me this talisman?"

"Of course, Lord Tzeentch" (Hehe, he doesn't know that I'm not actually going to do it. But I know he's reading my mind, so I WILL do it, but the very moment I leave, I will actually not do it. He'll be surprised when I actually bring it to him...)

"You are my most schizophrenic warrior."

[ChaosLemonVIII]

Khorne is the patron of strongmen, powerlifters, people who go to the gym for strength.

Slaanesh is the patron of bodybuilders, people who sculpt their bodies, and want to look their best. People who use the gym to enhance perfection.

[foggyfrogg]

Personally, I worship Pancreas. Only takes my subscription and not my soul and in return he gives semi-good quality videos and memes for me to consume.

[DILegion]

The fan base thinking of Nurgle as a loving grandfather would really appeal to the daddy issues of the primarchs

[jedediahcoulbourne]

I love that Ahriman is scheming and plotting to escape, meanwhile Tzeench is just rubbing his (hands?) together hyping it up "Yes little Egyptian wizard, get that library card!"

[infectedworms]

A small aside: Nuffle is also the god of dicerolls and probability, but only pertaining to Bloodbowl. This technically means that no actual in universe character prays to him, but rather real life players of Bloodbowl are his followers.

[DreadAnon]

worship khorne? worship slaanesh? worship nurgle? how bout i'm doin NONE of em!
hashut gang rise up

[joeymalaria]

I find nurgle the most disturbing one because he reminds me of how real cults work with love bombing, and even if it is genuine, you’re basically destroying yourself mentally all for the promise of happiness, and like a cult they target people in a vulnerable situation, which I’m shocked to see people think that’s a positive.

[cpom]

Thanks for giving Malal and the boys the spotlight for a while. Really means alot for all 11 of us still hoping for his return

[_NIKOS_NIKOS]

A few more things in Nurgle's favor.
1)In contrast to the other chaos gods Nurgle doesnt create new daemons all that much but he instead turns the souls of his dead followers into new daemons and they seem to retain a good deal of their memories as well. Having an afterlife as a guarantee is legit one of the best things you could ask in this setting compared to the alternatives.
2) Nurgle daemons are legit capable of forming genuine bonds and friendships with each other by default and not as an oddity.
3)If you really mess up, Nurgle is the kind of guy that might eventually forgive you. Sure he might putt you in a time-out jar for some amount of time but he will probably let you out eventually.

As for Slaneesh:
1)A chance to get into a relationship with a daemon if you are into that (you know who you are). I am not even joking, Syll'esske pretty much proves that genuine love between slaneesh daemons and cultists is possible and it is even hintent that while it's kinda rare its not rare enough to be something frowned upon by other daemons,
2)You will never be judged for being a perfectionist

[raphaelphenix]

When you hear for the first time:
"Hey hey hey"

You know that only Tzeentch can be in your heart.

[gabba-hey]

The description of Khorne's motivations for granting boons made me think of performance reviews, budget reports, and grant funding. Demonstrate you can capably manage mass murder and turn a profit of skulls and he may approve your request for more muscles. Khorne probably outsources the actual accounting to Nurgle's plaguebearers though.

Edit: and again the Great Horned Rat was forgotten, as is fitting.

[ErikWarhammer]

You forgot about the "make your own Chaos God" from the "Realm of Chaos: Slaves to Darkness" book.

For, you know, people who REALLY want something wild & out there.

[voodoodummie]

I would say the only one that was missing is the Horned Rat, who actually has human worshipers. He is the god of ruin and survival, and worshiping him seems to be more a case if you want to be pet or prey.

[gruntmasterbroadcast]

Personally I go with Tzeentch I greatly enjoy being ever contradictory yet right and equal parts wrong at the same time! After all who can say no to unlimited power even if it takes is a bit of madness?!

[HansLemurson]

Help, my dedication to Tzeentch is going perfectly fine and my hands always agree with each other. I love the new perspective on I love the new perspective I love the new perspective on life since he has granted me eyeballs within my eyeballs so I can see while I see while I see. I can also see backwards so the universe looks at ME when I open my eyes when I open my eyes, and I am winning the game against it of Two Truths and a Lie. The Lie is that there were two Truths, and the Truth is that it's all Lies. But only if you believe my left hand; she's crazy!

[Lordradost]

Khorne: I hate Mondays.
Slaanesh: I like my Sundays.
Nurgle: I'm sick, but going to work anyway.
Tzeentch: Screw my boss, I want his job.