The Ultimate Dilemma of Being In A Relationship with an Addict or Alcoholic

If you're in a relationship with an addict or alcoholic, then you're likely constantly asking yourself if you should stay or go? Maybe you've even become addicted to the relationship. You know it's not healthy but you just can't let go of it. In this video, we will talk with relationship expert Kim Garrett about codependency addiction, why we get so stuck, and how to find ourselves again.

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[AYe-lyyo]

I think it is time to leave when you want a better life for yourself.

[davidtapang]

Finally some real talk for those of us with addicted partners. Been trying to make my decision forever and it's ruining me. This happens to guys in relationships too not just women. Love and light!

[alouettedemer]

The abuse I've experienced at the hands of my alcoholic husband is nothing short of sadism. I've lost all sympathy for alcholics. I've run out of tears to cry.

[tinarobinson]

I'm just finally burned out from my alcoholic hubs. The emotional, verbal abuse, gaslighting, & complete lack of accountability are insane!! I'm the only person who truly sees the behavior, too. Financial reasons have kept me in this, but I'm at a point now that I'd rather struggle financially than deal with all of this. 😢

[joycewilson]

I have been dating someone for about three months and he treated me so well. He would disappear for a day or two without reason. At first I thought that he was cheating but soon found out based on his looks and behaviors that is was drugs. I was so hurt because he never told me that drugs was in his history. When I confronted him he became angry, and began to accuse me of silly things like cheating and other things that made no sense. Needless to say his sudden agitation and anger after he had been so loving and kind, led me to cut it off with him. I truly began to fall in love with him but Thankful that I had dodged the bullet.

[tammierusby]

I just ended a relationship because of his drinking .it was hard because he is a good man but I don't see a future with someone who drinks and also drinks to destress and he can't find another way to destress. He ends up drinking too much.i saw a person I didn't like and I don't want a future with and I've really tried .I've been supportive and I've tried to get him to go to meetings and counseling and he doesn't think he needs that and I can't get through to him and I know I won't.. He doesn't think he has a problem and I honestly don't think he will stop drinking. I did what was right for me.

[SelfLoveU]

I've found that when you have a strong sense of self, you are less likely to be influenced by gaslighting and lies. Nobody can make you feel less than or crazy when you know who you are and you practice self care. That is recovery.

[leigh]

Your channel has been such a eye opener. I feel like I've been in a dramatic, chaotic, emotional roller-coaster with my bf for 7 years. His family did not help his issues. I lost myself completely. I feel like I was his enabler for drugs and alcohol. I cannot tell you what a weight off my shoulders ending the relationship is. Omg... Gaslighting daily, denial and what a victim. Emotional and financial abuse. I'm free!!! I'm discovering my old self again daily. ❤️

[Pinpilinlique]

And this doesn't change that much after 9 years of being sober either, the emotional stuff inside them is what's wrong, not the substance abuse.

[millstreetteut]

I was in such a dilemma with my addicted spouse, I loved him so very much I loved his personality and everything about him and still at the end the addiction has won. He was taken by his addiction and so was our relationship. It is so sad, truely. Heartbreaking

[lovebeauty.]

I leave my alcoholic husband.
I feel peace for not being with him but sometimes I feel bad for leaving him.
But I tried so hard to be strong alone.

[haleybomb]

I’m over here trying to put the shovel down so I can stop digging my own grave. Married to the love of my life for 6 years, but we have been off and on for 19 years. He’s a very addictive alcoholic. Thank you for being you. This is the best channel for me.

[johnholms]

I gave up drinking a year ago with no help from anyone apart from myself. I did not want any help from anyone, even my partner. Thankfully the love we feel for each other has shone through and we are really happy now. So it is not always the case that addicts are messed up trash. I guess it depends on how far down the road the addict has gone.

[harkinsdavid]

Just left my girlfriend who is an alcoholic. I was the classic enabler all the way up till she hit rehab. She got out of rehab and I changed, but she didn't. It took a week for her to ask me for vodka. I said no. A week later she probably snuck alcohol around me, and was trashed in front of my dad. Claimed it was her muscle relaxers. Found the bottle the next week, and asked her to talk to me about it when she is tempted or does drink, and make some changes to her life to keep this from happening. (attend meetings, see a therapist, remove triggers, etc.) A little over a week later she called out to work to get drunk with someone she met in rehab. When I tried to talk to her about it, she literally did not pick up the phone or answer my text. She finally called me as I brought her things to her mother, but told her this will not work. She doesn't want to help herself. I can't fix it. Only thing I can do is help myself.

[resistancerebels]

Just hasn't changed...loves the alcohol more...simple

[maranatha]

IF THEY DON’T QUIT LEAVE ITS THE ONLY THING THEY CAN SEE

[elizabethroszoha]

If a person refuses to utilize the tools available to them, for their alcoholism/drug the choice they have them live with their consequences. We are each responsible for our own actions period.

[waynethompson]

My wife struggles with bing drinking, self medicating herself with anti depressants. She has three DUI’s and is drinking and driving again. I’m so over her shit, but we have two young boys at home. I’m watching my boys struggle with what she is doing. I’m loosing myself trying to hold my house together. I work ten hour days. I get home, get the boys fed, do laundry, home work, she seems to not even be mentally attached to us most days. She won’t go to a counselor and get help. I gotta fuckin leave her, I can’t take this crazy shit anymore!

[wuowrkp]

My partner was alcoholic/ dependent he gave up 3 years ago everything was great. I stuck by him through his alcoholism it was so hard.

A year and a half after quitting alcohol he then started smoking weed. He spent all the savings on it leaving us with no money and weed is now his priority.

He has no intention of giving it up or cutting it down. His attitude is "if I don't like it I know where the door is".

I'm moving out in a few days after 10 years.

I stuck by him through one addiction and I'm not doing it with another. I feel like I'm wasting my life sticking around hoping for change.

I love him with every fiber of my being. But I have to put me first now.

I hope for his sake he sorts himself out as right now all he wants and spends money on is weed and without it he's a nightmare

[debbiee.]

The isolation is so severe at this point, I don’t see the mental, emotional and physical strength to get out of this so I feel stuck like a catatonic zombie. The suffering has turned into numbness and I fear existing in this state for years. Not going anywhere forward. The fear is of withdrawal. The fear of feelings of abandonment is higher than the fear of staying. This is the scariest part atm. That it might take something severe to catapult me out of this. I have no hope nor faith in myself after trying to leave multiple times and returning due to panic from separation. Then isolate more.