A Mistake We All Make In Narcissistic Relationships

ORDER MY NYT BESTSELLING BOOK 📖 "IT'S NOT YOU"

JOIN MY HEALING PROGRAM

JOIN THE DR. RAMANI NETWORK

GET INFO ABOUT MY UPCOMING PROGRAM FOR THERAPISTS

SIGN UP FOR MY MAILING LIST

LISTEN TO MY NEW PODCAST "NAVIGATING NARCISSISM"

DISCLAIMER: THIS INFORMATION IS FOR EDUCATIONAL PURPOSES ONLY AND IS NOT INTENDED TO BE A SUBSTITUTE FOR CLINICAL CARE. PLEASE CONSULT A HEALTH CARE PROVIDER FOR GUIDANCE SPECIFIC TO YOUR CASE. THIS VIDEO DISCUSSES NARCISSISM IN GENERAL.

THE VIDEO DOES NOT REFER TO ANY SPECIFIC PERSON, AND SHOULD NOT BE USED TO REFER TO ANY SPECIFIC PERSON, AS HAVING NARCISSISM. PERMISSION IS NOT GRANTED TO LINK TO OR REPOST THIS VIDEO, ESPECIALLY TO SUPPORT AN ALLEGATION THAT THE MAKERS OF THIS VIDEO BELIEVE, OR SUPPORT A CLAIM, THAT A SPECIFIC PERSON IS A NARCISSIST. THAT WOULD BE AN UNAUTHORIZED MISUSE OF THE VIDEO AND THE INFORMATION FEATURED IN IT.

[NarcSurvivor]

We believe their lies. We believe that what they’re saying to us is true. As though they actually have something to bring to a relationship. When it’s just a void. And everything you give disappears without a trace. You don’t get it back. You leave the relationship drained and often a shell of who you used to be.

[discopotato]

Enough good days to confuse you. Enough bad days to break your Your #1 quote Dr. Ramani

[Truthtellers]

The abuse never ends. Leave and go no contact. It's the only way.

[phillipearle]

Never let your guard down with a narcissist, even when they’re “being nice”. Some of the worst experiences of my life have been when I was my authentic self with a narcissist, only to be shot down and ridiculed. Best to stay quiet, and hope they don’t notice you.

[codysork]

To all those suffering from a narcissist in your life, may you find safety and healing, and may the narcissist also find healing and freedom from their disturbed mind.🙏

[sushmayen]

No contact works but healing ourselves is as much important. Their mind games made us doubt our self worth.

[yang]

In a narcissistic climate, people's souls die slowly.Find an environment that will nurture you instead of draining you.

[tamaramarie]

Those sunny days kept me in for 13 years even though I was living in mostly a tornado. Been 6 weeks no contact and my head feels free and I can focus at work better. Hugs to everyone ❤️

[potpourrioflife]

What I have recently experienced is that even in their laughter, you still need an umbrella. They feel it is okay to laugh at you through what they claim is teasing. It is painful.

[pamelamurray]

They are like a grade 6 mean kid. Model student in the classroom, bully on the school yard. You can never win them over because they would see that as a loss of control and they have way too much of a lust for control. When they are being "nice", it's only to confuse you. They've shown you who they are!!

[nicolematt]

Guard your heart! Start peeling away people-pleasing, dont be too nice. Stay calm, observe, and (if ready)- don't tolerate as much (but it may become more stressful), start making decisions, learn to slow things down (for you), so you can process more effectively. And then get the clarity you need..❤

[kelliemendelow]

Dr Ramani please include more descriptions of Narcissists that are not openly yelling and dominating. My ex was so covert and under the table with his abuse that he could do it, and always did it, in front of people. Family, our kids, friends, strangers, coworkers….but when you only describe the obvious abuse it’s hard for those of us who had it so utterly disguised that it was hard to see for even ourselves.

[mandynam]

I just realised that if someone doesn't love you now, they might later on. That's fine. No problem or hard feelings. But if someone doesn't respect you, they never will.

[maryellenyork]

Christians emphasize hope but those blessed to live in a world without a narcissist add to our trauma when their platitudes are applied to human relationships. "Toxic faith" was very painful, but my unshakeable true faith in a God who saw my situation and gave me strength helped me separate God's Word from man's misinformation. It was a lonely journey of being misunderstood. I live in peace now but keep my "umbrella" always at hand.

[mariagill]

It's a proverb from my culture "don't break pichers if you see clouds" means don't destroy your resources if you have a hope of something better.

[tessamary]

When you have narcissistic adult children it is beyond heartbreaking. There are just no words of comfort just grief. 😢

[WinterWarlock]

"Don't burn your umbrellas".

I'm glad you explained it. My initial reaction would be: "I just try to avoid the rain by not going outside to begin with". I've been indoors for the last 3.5 years, initially due to Covid. But I enjoy my isolation away from people, so no reason to go outside where people are. I've had too many narcissists in my life, bringing drama, trauma and chaos. Isolation offers me calm, quiet, serenity. Not everyone is a narcissist, but I'm tired of narcissists, flying monkeys, enablers, and the ignorant. I'm tired of people. Isolation works well for me. An odd fact: I'm NEVER lonely when I'm alone. I'm only lonely when I'm among other people.

So I don't need an umbrella because I take the avoidant method instead. It works for me. But I know it's an over-simplistic solution to an imperfect world when I know the narcissists are out there in the world looking for their next victim. And I'm tired of constantly being someone else's victim of their abuse.

I guess avoid the rain if you can. And if you can't, then either take the umbrella or expect to get wet.

[NancyBrown]

I was thinking about this today. Narcissists are walking theatres. All of their behavior is false and acting roles designed to make you express emotions for their supply. Don’t buy into their theatre tickets. If you buy their theatre ticket, “I Did This For You!” - They want you obligated. Don’t buy it. They have many theatre drama tickets for sale.

[higuoy]

This is SO good! Of course I didn't have any umbrellas to start, because I didn't understand Narcissism, but I stocked up after my eyes were opened. I guess my ex didn't like umbrellas because he left! 😉

[leonellie]

He is almost gone…… calling all those friends I pushed off in caring mode…… calling all MY friends back. :)💜🧚🏻‍♀️💜