Psychologist Explains Why WOMEN DON'T APOLOGIZE

Why WOMEN DON'T APOLOGIZE: understanding the nature of the problem

[kwban]

As a man, from my experience in relationships with women, when an argument occurred their goal was not to resolve the issue but rather to win the argument. And the longer it went for me trying to get her to admit she was wrong, the more infuriated I got until I said something that made her mad and then she would attempt to turn it around on me..

[randywise]

My wife insulted me once. I got mad and told her that was not a good thing to do. She said I was being too sensitive. I told her I have nothing to say to you and will not respect her till she sees how insulted her statement was. I then left and went to the lake and went fishing the rest of the weekend. When I finally went home, I found a very sad and apologetic women. She saw how much it hurt me and was afraid I would leave her. She never did it again and apologizes when she upsets me, even when she is right. When that happens, I let her know when she is right and apologize, she felt that way. We have not had a fight since. Without the respect of the one you love, there is no love.

[everything...interesting]

You know who else hates accountability? Narcissists. Could there BE a connection?

[your_royal_highness]

I’m 71, going on 72. I can count the apologies I’ve received on two hands. So there! 😊. Remember the line spoken by Jack Nicholson’s character in the movie “As Good As It Gets.” When asked how he understands women so well he replied with “It’s easy; I take a man and remove reason and accountability.” One of the best lines I have ever heard anywhere.

We don't just move on. We move on with a caveat, which is an emotional ding to our attachment to you. With every unaddressed infraction, we emotionally withdraw from you... Becoming more indifferent towards you. This will make you feel less secure and cared for. Bottom line: never attempt to change a man's feelings towards you violating him. Address it in the way he needs to be addressed or else.

[megeek]

This one hits too close to home. I have "never" heard an apology from any woman. They will walk away from a multiyear relationship rather than apologize. They will call back a hundred times asking if you are still mad at them but never apologize. They will ask if you are horny because it has been a long time but never apologize. They will try to turn the tables like they were the ones hurt but never apologize. It is like they have a code of conduct that says to never apologize to a man. They feel so much empathy for other women but none for the men in their lives. Mothers will go against their own sons to empathize with another woman no matter what wrong she committed. Women consider themselves better communicators than men but this obviously is a hoax.

[calvinhamilton]

I am 54, and I have been apologized to by female lovers, female Co-workers, and female family members less than 6 times in my life.

[earnestrobinson]

I was wrong, and I take full responsibility for my part in this situation. Said no women ever.

[NeilTruick]

Many years ago, my mother kept my younger brother from doing something that he wanted to do. When the confrontation occurred, I was out of town and unreachable, so I didn't hear about the confrontation and the aftermath until a couple of days after it happened. When my mother discussed the situation and the decision she came to with me, I literally asked her, "Have you lost your damn mind?" Long story short, if I had been present, the outcome would have been completely different. I told her she messed up big time and she needs to fix it. Needless to say, my brother was livid and speaking to our mother was something it took a while for him to do again.

Fast-forward 19 years. Our mother had passed away a few years before, and the relationship between my brother and I was strained, but we were all we had as far as family. I chalked it up to us both trying to live our lives and establish ourselves in our respective fields. Because of a breakup, he had to move in with me temporarily. During a conversation we had, that situation from many years before came up. He started to tell me he couldn't understand why I didn't support him. I didn't understand what he was talking about. After a few back and forths, he told me that our mother told him I supported her decision to not allow him to do the thing he wanted to do. Rather than apologize to him (which she absolutely should have), she chose to double-down on her wrongness and blatently lie on me, which damaged my relationship with my brother for almost 20 years and I knew nothing about it until that day. Being dead saved my mother that day...

[sirbradfordofhousejones]

My wife pretty much won’t apologize until she’s had a chance to reflect on what happened. Thank goodness she eventually does. But getting there is a STRUGGLE.

[subjer]

There is no incentive for women to say they are sorry, because society says women are never wrong and believe all women, even when they lie.

[Tunda]

I’m 27 and the only time women have apologized to me has been when they were saying “sorry for your loss”

[Sydebern]

It's not 'game', it's called being a decent human being, taking accountability for your actions.

[cathyholcombe]

This line from the 1970 movie "Love "Love means never having to say you are sorry" became a mantra back then. Nothing is further away from the truth than this line.

[theanabolicviking]

I almost had a heart attack listening to that apology you did. I have NEVER heard a woman apologize like that before in my life.

[Loroths]

Spot on. I'm an unmarried 35 year old man. The only women who has ever apologised to me is my mother. I've been wronged by multiple exes. Each time I waited for an apology or even acknowledgement which never came. In my younger days I would casually and calmly bring it up, she would feel attacked that I mention it and get upset and then I ended up apologising. I realised though that I was being a mug as they used emotions to manipulate. Then one girlfriend who was already ungrateful and never even said thank you for anything I did for her, she cheated. I found out but I didn't yell or fly off the handle but I did confront her calmly and there was no way she could deny it but instead of apologising, what did she do? Full grown woman starts crying. Not because she felt remorse. No, but because there was literally no dirt she could throw back at me. Needless to say I dropped her there and then. It was a final straw.

[legendoflex]

My step mother did something wrong that caused some financial instability in one of our family members. Instead of apologizing and admitting what happened was her fault she instructed my dad to pay his friend back. He didn’t accept the money because it was more about what she did to cause the issue in the first place, and what he really wanted was accountability…He didn’t get it😑She would rather pay out two grand from the families money then give a “I’m sorry”

[UnkleKlumsy]

Never heard a genuine apology from a woman in my life. Still holding my breath

[funkyguy]

I've heard plenty of women apologise. They just happen to say "I'm sorry if you think I'm wrong!"

[robertanna]

I spent 20+ years in a marriage just like this. What a nightmare. It never deviated from the algorithm; 1.) Bring it to her attention and argue about my "anger", 2.) "I said I was sorry what more do you want?". But she never ever did or would apologize. 3.) Then that pretend apology would be a whole new argument until I just gave up and detached further away. It's been 10 years since we split and I truly believe I'd be dead today if I'd stayed married to her.