6 Ways Mother Wounds Manifest + Impact Your Life - Terri Cole

Have you ever wondered how your relationship with your maternal impactor has impacted you?

Do you feel like your relationship with your mother/mother figure is ‘off’?

Or do you find yourself longing for a different relationship with her altogether?

Then this episode is for you. I cover the seven archetypes of mothering and give you deep-dive questions to determine which archetype you experienced and whether you have a mother wound.

*Time Stamps*
0:00 - Introduction
1:52 - Feelings around the mother wound
3:29 - #1: Hot and Cold mother
5:17 - #2: Role Reversal (parentified child)
6:26 - #3: Self-Focused/Obsessed mother
8:05 - #4: The BFF mother
10:33 - #5: The Perfectionist
12:02 - #6: The 'Good Enough' Mother
15:29 - #7: The Unavailable/Rejecting mother
16:55 - What is a mother wound?

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*About Terri Cole*
Terri Cole is a licensed psychotherapist, global relationship and empowerment expert, and the author of Boundary Boss-The Essential Guide to Talk True, Be Seen and (Finally) Live Free.

For over two decades, Terri has worked with a diverse group of clients that includes everyone from stay-at-home moms to celebrities and Fortune 500 CEOs.

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*Resources to Check out*

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#terricoleshow #motherwound #motherchild

[itsmeaimster]

The Perfectionist is my mom. To the point that she’d be like “What will people think? What will the neighbors think? What will the people at church think?” It has always been a constant worry for her. I had terrible self esteem and anxiety from never reaching her high standards. I keep my distance now, especially emotionally. I’m “choosing me” now. ❤

[princesslizzie]

I am pretty sure I have a mother wound, I have always been the mother to my mother and she was never there for me emotionally when I needed her and was very critical. I learnt to be tough but the down side is I shut people out and the hardest part is understanding why a mother does that to her child 🤔😢

[ultravioletpisces]

My mom was very critical and anxious… but I never realized that she was probably a perfectionist and critical of herself as well. My mom has been gone for 13 years and tbh… I forget a lot of the negative behaviors because you know, we think about people differently when they die. But this gave me a lot of insight into myself as well as my mother.

It never occurred to me that I might be a perfectionist (at least in part) because my mom was so critical and anxious.

“Feeling like you can never get it right” is so true. “It can really squash your desire to go for your dreams.

[DeeLeon]

Hello, I'm Dee in UK.
I'm autistic, 54 & terrified of Mum. Almost to the point of vomiting. Autism intensifies the senses.
My clinical diagnosis of autism states I'm even more vulnerable.
I find you a safe, feminine, intelligent, caring woman and what you say is helpful.
A lot of what you say is giving me anxiety, I'm persevering as you are spot on.

[melissaczap]

I found you randomly and I'm glad I did. I grew up being gaslighted by my mom, and so much more and I feel empty and sad for what could have been and I am in therapy and working through stuff, I find your videos comforting ❣️

[annlea]

Thank you so much for helping us understand. My mother was never available growing up. I love her but I'm emotionally damaged because of it but getting better. Thank you again for all your work. God Bless you and your family.🙏❤️‍🩹

[GD-crum]

My father was an alcoholic and my mother had no family as she was adopted by horrible adoptive parents so she made me her free therapist. She was only physically abusive with me not my sister. She had many affairs with other men because my father was mostly absent. At 40 I confronted her and she takes no accountability. She also passed remarks on my appearance. She wasn't great but always guilts us saying she took all the sacrifices. I really pray to God I have a reincarnation so my next life is filled with fulfilment and loving people around

[InfiniteMindset]

Dynamic Terri! You are right, we may minimize and not acknowledge the neglect because it was so well hidden as by a covert narcissist. I was shocked when a therapist a decade ago told me my mother neglected me. I wouldn’t believe it for several years.

[janetdillon]

My mom was severe bi polar and I became the parent. My dad was was weekend alcoholic and home trashed by smashing things in the home when he got home from the pub. I have a mother wound 6 out of 7 and. Dad wound well. I am doing well however a lot of self help. Thank you Terri

[thandozuma]

I think forgiving was the easiest part for me, healing not so easy.

All I am left with now is fear of intimacy, not taking care of my self properly, depression, anxiety, lack of boundaries, hyper independence, perfectionism . Disorganized Attachment, fear of vulnerability. Unstable relationships. 😩 And yearning for maternal love I never received in childhood and this yearning for martenal love cause a lot of shame.

Nothing is cute at all with having a mother wound 😩

[gregariasanchez]

Creo que los arquetipos 1, 2, 3, 4 y 7. Llena casi todas las categorías. Y en mi caso, , también arrastro las consecuencias, aunque las he trabajado mucho con Al-Anon, aún tengo situaciones qué superar. Lo último y muy doloroso pero aliviador al final, fue separarme en contacto casi cero de ella. Así he podido sanar viejas heridas.que se siguen manifestando.de diversas maneras. Lo que amo es que soy una mamá tan diferente a la que tuve! Estoy orgullosa de ello.

[marvellousmartha]

I had an exhausted mother. I was babysitting siblings from age 6 .. TY for this..

[linedezainde]

Mothers are often imperfect, as unfortunately, society puts all the pressure to "succeed" on them, as if they had a doctorate degree in child raising... we don't talk about dad and society very much. The question perhaps is: why does it all belong to mom?

[tmreaves]

My life has been tremendously affected by my mother dying when I was a baby and my maternal grandmother raising me. My grandmother was very uncaring to me. I constantly look for that caring loving connection in my relationships and friendships. I am very clingy and needy. My attachment style is definitely anxious attached.

[marilynoverton]

Thank you so much, Terri! Such great information! Blessings to you.

[gabriellaarango]

Thank you !!!! Terri❣️🌸
Excellent presentation, enjoyed it a ton, the more I learn … the more I understand … to help organize the puzzle, the lighter I feel and a what a great feeling that is !!!🥰

[ilenehernandez]

My first time watching. Nice to meet you Terri I'm Ilene

[pamwatkins]

Wonderful teaching, thanks, found something else helpful another time, appreciated

[princesslizzie]

Thank you I do believe I have a mother wound and am trying hard to heal. The hardest part is understanding why a mother treats her child the way she does but your videos are so incite full and are helping understand it's not me. I have had no contact with my mother for over 18 months and she lives across the road, not for much longer now though as I'm moving away.

[t_nels]

This resonates, Thank you Terri. ❤️‍🩹