Am I pushing myself too hard in life?

Are you exhausted all the time? Feeling like you're trying so hard to get better, but still struggling? We could be pushing ourselves too hard and making it worse. In this video we're talking all about why we continue to place ourselves into uncomfortable situations and how we should think about challenging ourselves healthily. A lot of you experience social anxiety and have shared that on former videos, yet you continue to place yourself in situations that make you uncomfortable and may make you feel worse despite you wanting to feel better. So why do we do that? And how should we manage situations like these so we can feel better without trying to do too much?

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[Katimorton]

More info & videos in the description!

[Kestas_X]

Without discomfort there's no growth. But that doesn't mean you should go out of your way to suffer.

[mori]

I also struggle to find a balance between challenging myself in social situations and doing too much, but I'm slowly learning the difference during the events, so when I'm already there. When I start feeling overwhelmed, I leave. That really helps me so that a healthy challenge doesn't slip into a bad experience.

[annaczgli]

I'm at a dark place right now, & this was very helpful. Thank you for your wonderful video.

[jameshalliday]

I feel like I need to "light myself on fire " to keep everyone else warm, wife, family, coworkers, friends. I have a great job but I've been ignoring health issues to make sure everyone else's needs are met. I work through pain but feel so guilty just needing a break to fix myself.

[mspears_bobobuddytheseniorcat]

This was helpful Kati! I like how you compared it to stretching and knowing when to stop when it hurts.

[hzlgry]

her comment about speaking and holding boundaries really hit home for me. Thank you for voicing that.

[lynylcullen]

Excellent! I beat myself up when I just freeze and panic and “can’t do it” (social situations) however it’s challenging to know when I should push myself or TAKE CARE OF MYSELF! Difficult to explain to ppl who haven’t gone through this. I appreciate the support!

[Whowhatwherewhy]

Prepare yourself by leaving yourself an out…a graceful way to exit an uncomfortable situation without a needed explanation…

[theresahodgins-lott]

I just found you. I’m 65. I’ve left a narcissist partner 2 months ago. And moved to another city where I only know family. My spouse and I were together 18 yrs, married 15. I Recently filed for divorce. My spouse once said “ nothing will make you happy” and I question that as it may be true. I am having a hard time “getting out there” and my family expects me to. It’s hard to get out there and keep my mind busy. I’m experiencing Trauma Bonding in the worst way. I hope to find my groove and find happiness.

[dtearney]

Thank You for this video, Katie! It came at the perfect timing for me.

I recently left my job working in ABA because of the constant stress of my job and how irritable I was becoming.

Deep down, I know I'll miss that job, to some degree, but as someone that's being treated for symptoms of BPD and the mini-buffet of comorbidies that come with them, I admit that I struggle to know the different between taking a break and quitting.

My pattern, so I've learned, has been: Please others as much as humanly possible, get upset when I can't, share those insecurities with someone who doesn't see it the same way I do, feel misunderstood, bottle it in, then dump it out when it's least appropiate.

Rinse. Lather. Repeat.

It scares me how much knowing my own cycle of behavior doesn't relieve me from giving into the same impulses. But I'm trying to do better.

[muzerhythm]

This was the most helpful info I've gotten from a therapist..thank you!😁 My biggest struggle is that the goals I'm working on I enjoy doing them, the problem is with depression I sometimes struggle with VERY low energy and I get really frustrated with myself to have to stop being as active on my goals for a while. It's SO HARD to find a balance of pushing myself and not let depression take over or knowing to slow down.🤔

[jeremyspiegelman]

Thanks. I've been trying to grow recently by pushing myself into stressful situations (quitting 2 jobs in a few months) and trying to move countries. I find myself struggling to stay positive and happy. This vidso helped me remeber that I am drawn to causing myself pain ti feel alive and that I'm moving in a direction. I don't know how to feel that way without this.

[Eco_Hiko]

This video explains why my first try at CBT failed. I was set "homework" of pushing myself, to go outside and socialise at a café 3 times a week and encouraged to ignore my boundaries. Back then I couldn't even go near the windows of my house not alone go outside. I don't know why but I've never thought of it through the perspective of this video. That "therapy" laid the foundation for my mental health now. I often go out, do things, be with people that burn me out and wonder why I feel worse.
Note: I'm now in a different form of therapy and a lot of the time I link things back to the start of my recovery. It's important to listen to yourself. I'm slowly learning that

[michelem]

This couldn't have been timed any better if you were my own personal therapist. Thank you so much for sharing your knowledge and experience. 🙂

[smoozerish]

The key is to push in bursts to get ahead in life and then know when to take time off and chill and enjoy life

[miket]

Thank you, Kati. It's good to see you still going strong. You are an encouragement to so many people.

[thegamingguy]

This is like when I wanna continue to play competitive video games cause I hate losing, but it's actually not something I truly enjoy doing, I just feel obligated to play cause I wanna be cool or whatever, but at the end of the day it's actually miserable.

[amtep]

My problem is I have both social anxiety and loneliness. If I overdo the socializing I get a backlash and feel even more lonely.

[marilounaddol]

I keep having constant break down because of disappointment and from lots of unknown complicated feeling sometimes I have no idea what to feel anymore. I have to force myself to go to work on a job that they recommended and was force to take and at night I come home exhausted. Small things leaves me in tears, and simple choices is so hard for me. People around me always reminds me that I am wasting my time when really it is so hard to leave my bed and leave the house.