Debunking success myths | Neil deGrasse Tyson, Michio Kaku & more

You can’t predict success. But according to minds like Neil deGrasse Tyson, Michio Kaku & more, you can hot wire it.

It’s perhaps never been easier to feel as if you’ve fallen behind in life. From the anxieties of comparing yourself to others online to our fetishization of success, it can seem like everyone else is out there attaining their goals and feeling happy while you feel stuck.

The reality is that many people feel stuck — even those who present themselves as models of conventional success. So, what are some ways you can meaningfully work toward your goals, while also making sure that your goals are worth pursuing in the first place?

Todd Rose, the co-founder and president of the think tank Populace, offers a framework called the “dark horse” mindset. As a rejection of conventional wisdom about how to succeed, the mindset includes four main strategies: know your micromotives, know your choices, know your strategies, and ignore the destination.

Weighing in on those strategies and broader questions about success are other Big Think contributors, including Neil deGrasse Tyson, Michio Kaku, and Alex Banayan.

0:00 Introduction
0:43 What is a 'dark horse'?
1:20 Dark horse lesson #1: Know your micro-motives
2:09 Neil deGrasse Tyson's mindset
2:57 Dark horse lesson #2: Know your choices
3:12 Steven Spielberg's mindset
6:06 Dark horse lesson #3: Know your strategies
6:30 Michio Kaku: Eisenhower's mindset
7:42 Dark horse lesson #4: Ignore the destination
8:15 Sarah Robb O'Hagan's mindset
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Read more of our stories on success:
The paradoxical reasons for science’s success
Four key rules for successful leadership
Upskilling: The key to success in the new world of work

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[bigthink]

What do you think is the biggest myth of success?

[zibbitybibbitybop]

Luck. The single biggest factor in success that most people refuse to recognize is sheer, dumb luck, and they do so because it's unpleasant to accept that a major component of what happens in your life is totally beyond your control. You can try to make your own breaks and should definitely plan ahead, but at the end of the day, you can't control other people and you can only play with the hand that life deals you. The sooner you accept this, the sooner you'll be able to accept that doing the best you can is good enough, regardless of how ideal the outcome is or isn't.

[purestaxentertainment]

Quick notes:

Knowing Micro Motives
-Some ppl motivated by organizing

Know Your Choices
-Have a lot more choices if you look
-There's always a third door (mindset)
-Stop shmoozing & make something that you can have in your hand and show people (Spielberg story)

Knowing your strategies
-Theres multiple ways
-Optimism with one eye on the future

Ignore the destination
-moments of uncertainty
-ongoing process

[zukimajuqwana]

The thing that's missing from this is that luck plays an outsized role in every success story, but no one ever acknowledges that because 1) it's not replicable, and 2) no one likes to say "my succcess actually has very little to do with me."

Spielberg would never have been Spielberg if he hadn't accidentally happened upon Chuck Silvers. Churchill would never have been Churchill if war hadn't broken out in Europe - he was a terrible peacetime leader. They were both lucky, really. The biggest myth is that successful people are in command of their own destinies. They aren't; none of us are. So the objective must be less about being successful and more about being happy and contributing something to the world that you think is important. If you do that you will at the very least be happy - and you might just be successful too, if you're lucky.

[michaelsims]

1) confidence is not "knowing you will succeed", its "knowing you will be ok if you dont".
2) Fear has killed more dreams than failure ever could.
3) Luck is when preparation meets opportunity.

[ogresworld]

I was initially very excited to watch this and ultimately disappointed that it's simply perpetuating the same "anyone can do it" nonsense that is the real problem.

I absolutely agree that people should follow their passion and stay strong in the face of adversity. Unfortunately, the demonstrable reality is that not everyone has the same capacity for it.

Until we understand the brain completely, our obsession with placing anecdotal success stories on a pedestal and telling the masses that anyone can do it is only adding to the rampant feelings of inadequacy in our society.

Self acceptance without societal judgement and pressure to fulfill your dreams is what people need. People shouldn't be made to feel like something is wrong with them if they simply aren't as ambitious as the examples we choose to call success.

[emiebex]

I lean more towards self-fulfillment. If you wanna do something might as well do something that makes you happy & satisfied with whatever choices you made. 🤷🏿‍♂️

[LordBrittish]

I never really thought before about the link between a hunger for knowledge, or curiosity, as being an optimistic person vs a pessimistic one. 6:30 I never say I can’t do things. When given a task, my mind always looks for a better or more efficient way of doing it.

[normapadro]

I always wondered what it was like to have everything you ever wanted as a kid. Every accomplishment is a difficult task to complete. I have a learning disability, but I was able to complete all of my educational goals including graduating from college. I wanted to be an author. I became an author. I wanted to become an artist. I self taught myself visual arts. I create art work. I'm a photographer. I am a music composer/ music producer. I have accomplished everything I set my mind to, because I applied myself. Anything is possible, but it takes hard work. I also compose music for movies, television, and commercials. I did all of this with a learning disability. Anything is possible.

[tayneilson]

Success is also realizing that there’s a fourth door. A door that is the exit where you realize you don’t even want to be in that club ever.

[roshanismailrm]

2:34 NDT says it all — *“I think the greatest of people that have ever been in society were never versions of someone else; They were themselves.”*

[ThePragmatic]

And perseverance. Always persevere and never give up.

[UnlimitlesslyFunnyDude]

0:43 What is a 'dark horse'?
1:20 Dark horse lesson #1: Know your micro-motives
2:09 Neil deGrasse Tyson's mindset
2:57 Dark horse lesson #2: Know your choices
3:12 Steven Spielberg's mindset
6:06 Dark horse lesson #3: Know your strategies
6:30 Michio Kaku: Eisenhower's mindset
7:42 Dark horse lesson #4: Ignore the destination
8:15 Sarah Robb O'Hagan's mindset

[HaploidCell]

I see Alex Banayan's take a bit critical.
It reminds me of this rule in the film Margin Call where it's "You can be first, be smarter, or you can cheat.".
Being first is just standing at the front of the line of the club. Being smarter also involves standing in the line and just outperforming the competition.
In essence, Spielberg cheated.
I don't know if he broke the law by jumping out of a tour and wandering sets. But there's also an element of luck there that gets glossed over.
You have to have the money to travel and buy entry, then you have to run into someone who can make decisions, who wants to mentor, and who isn't looking at the line going "I can literally take infinite shots at this for cheap, why invest in this one guy".
That's at least 4 levels of luck layered ontop of each other.
This could have gone wrong on so many levels.
And it only applies to certain types of jobs, where you can shimmy your way in and "proof yourself". There are a lot of jobs where that isn't possible.
For example, I wanted a specific local library job for a long time. It turned out it was actually impossible to get that job. It was already filled by someone, who could not be fired or promoted out of that position. This was due to how government employee jobs work around here.
And there were a bunch of people already jokeying for that position, for that time when that current holder retired. So any mentor would have had a vested interest in me not taking that position.
And then there's a whole plethora of jobs where you can't get in by "simply knowing your stuff". Where you need certain education, accreditation and certification and there is no chance of getting it, anywhere, without the money to get that training.
So it is a fine tool to know your motivation and your micro-motivation - but that means nothing when achievement is impossible, either practically or financially, which seems to me is the major problem most people face.
And budding your way in - what I refered to as "cheating", or "jumping the line" - carries unmentioned risks. Spielberg could have been in handcuffs if he wasn't lucky.
How many people are escorted out of locations by security every day because they fail, or because they don't meet someone important enough, or because they are unable to communicate their passion quickly and in the right tone? We never hear their stories.
Only looking at hyper successfull people gives you a confirmation biased result that makes the risks, dead ends, and obstacles largely invisible.
What most people want or need is a result that is "medium successfull" by those standards.
They do not want to be CEO or top of their field - positions that often involve an unhealthy work-life balance. They want to be successfull enough to "make a good living off of".
This whole pessimissm vs optimism thing is also dangerous.
I have seen too many people optmisitally walk into a dead end, or risk it all on one move and fail. The "one eye on the future" is fine, as long as the other eye is, as was pointed out, looking at the mechanics, the science, the different factors of it all.
And it is unscientific to be just an optimist. You have to be able to see the fault and points of failure in order to "predict the future" in any meaningful way.
Positive thinking alone will not save you.
Thank you for reading.

[Dia-Gnosis]

“I’ve had several people come up to me and said what can i do to be you?” Wow, so neil of you. 👏. 👏. 👏.

[Chimera]

if there's something you really want to do, what's really stopping you from doing it? I've heard countless people say "oh, I wish I could play the guitar" and when I ask them why they haven't tried to learn they claim they don't have the time. Yet I hear them talking about all these great shows they binge watched over the weekend. so... if you have the time to do that, then why aren't you actually spending it doing what you said you truly want to do? What I want to know, is what *really* stops people from doing these things? Maybe they just wish they were good at something without actually having to put in the time or effort to learn how to do it in the first place, but I think it's something deeper than that and I'm not smart enough to understand what that is. Though, I will say that success means different things to different people. A lot of these people had an incredible amount of luck that, along with their motivation, HAS helped turned them into billionaires. yeah they had the skills, but are also extremely fortunate to have such opportunities, meanwhile I'm sure many people have been JUST as motivated and still ended up poor because they dropped all their money on a business model that isn't sustainable. And I think considering "having a billion dollars" to be the pinnacle of success is also stupid and is what happens to be one of the many messed up things about the society we live in. (not saying they claimed that in the video, just saying that a lot of people consider that to be their main goal in life. which again, is stupid.)
And I know Michio is a really smart dude (way way smarter than me) but I think using war as an example is terrible. Nobody wins in a war, sure you can chalk it up to "casualties of war" but the amount of pain and suffering that war itself can cause much outweighs the rewards of winning that war. We see it as a necessary evil, but that does not change how many people were sacrificed over some stupid territorial or religious conquest. I agree that optimism is important, but we're talking about... war.
ANYWAY, following your passions is not a "waste of time", it's called just living your life like you've always wanted to but never allowed yourself. The "hustle" is a fat load of hogwash. live your life however you want but try to apply critical thinking to everything, including your own mind.
Of course, these days the housing market and general late stage capitalism is screwing over a lot of people so I understand the constant sense of dread surrounding that. Put it this way: either we will get our shit together as a collective, or we give up and let nature take over again as it's done after the last 6-7 ish major extinction events. Life will prevail. We might not though.
I'm a tiny bit drunk so sorry for this potentially incoherent ramble

[ninorimawi]

Wow! Finally, using the white screen properly! (I made a previous comment about it) I watched the video and suddenly thought, "Hey - I really like this. This was very well done!" Then I looked to see who made it, and I was pleasantly surprised. Big Think does really excellent work at research, telling the story, and being all-around amazing, but I was sadly getting distracted by the way the white screen was being used in past videos. I was SO IMPRESSED to see the change because now more people can really focus on your excellent storytelling rather than the white screen behind someone in a wide shot showing the background around it. This is truly a great documentary as the synthesis between educating and entertaining. In short - BRAVO!!

[lorddashme]

"Be the number one? or be the only one?" - what pushed/motivates me everyday... cool video thanks for this!

[darkcreatureinadarkroom]

For Neurodivergent people this message is so so important 🙏

[AGirlofYesterday]

The Spielberg story sounds inspiring, but the fact is he was lucky to be alive at a time when sneaking on to a studio lot was possible. You'd be arrested if you tried that today. Doesn't mean Steven isn't talented, doesn't diminish his impressive initiative -- but he also benefited greatly by living in a time when it was easier to "break in" to the movie biz, especially for a white male. His story proves that it IS "who you know" as well as "what you know, " because if he hadn't befriended a Universal executive, his short film would not have resulted in a 7-year contract.