3 great untruths to stop telling kids—and ourselves | Jonathan Haidt

These psychological principles can unlock your resiliency.

Popular platitudes can squash your critical thinking, argues moral psychologist Jonathan Haidt. Always trust your feelings? The world is a battle between good and evil? These popular pieces of conventional wisdom are merely myths—ones that can set us up for failure.

"When we protect children from unpleasantness, from conflicts, from insults, from teasing, from exclusion, we're preventing their social psychology, we're preventing their social abilities, we're preventing their strength from developing," says Haidt.

He highlights three great untruths and explains the psychological principles that debunk them. Unlearning a few token ideas can make us more resilient and help us grow, rather than break, in the face of adversity.

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[stupifyingstupedity]

Over-protection is the simplistic substitute to adaptive wisdom. Kids must be protected from misjudgment - their parents and their own. If you care for youth, you will protect them, not delude them.

[nickbezdek]

One of the worst things that people tell kids in k12 and so on is first start off with what would you like to be when you grow up as you crush there dream in pieces and then the older they get they experience sayings like nothing is best or its not personal, dont take things personally, seriously and as they grow even older they relize at 16 they get everything they want while others suffer from that age and by the time these kids get into young adulthood they start stereotype people and rebelling on religion and they as an older age start using words like life is short and as they get old they realize that if they would have kept there mouth shut and be open minded on what ever god and life throws at them, they would live strong and healthy

[alistairkhandy]

The antifragility concept is not that dogmatic. If a child is severely bullied it can have ramifications on their self esteem/confidence for the rest of their life affecting their prospects and relationships through the domino effect.

[syruptishuss]

I wish this could be shown at school board meetings before any discussion of curriculum could take place, and at college presentations before any speaker gets shouted down.

[shmeggley]

Kids don’t need the “challenges” of bullying, kids need to be taught how not to bully others

[gracemcdog]

There is a scientific term for 'what doesn't kill you makes you stronger.' It called hormesis.

[zaxtonhong]

Someone did an awful job at trying to deliver his points (either Haidt himself, or someone who chopped the interview up)
The first 2 minutes describe how “what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger” has some truth to it. There are systems that grow by being tested and stressed. One of which is children development. When you endure challenges, you’re stronger because of it. That is what “what doesn’t kill you…” means, and it’s exactly what anti-fragility means in this context. Yet that sentiment gets thrown into this video and labeled as an “untruth”.

So which is it? Is “what doesn’t kill you…” an untruth? Or should its principle be considered and applied when raising a child? Because it’s only taken you 2 minutes to contradict yourself

[indigoblue]

Oh l remember a Mormon Mother taking about this book and on. Her name is Ruth Franke. So its for that reason l won't watch anymore of this video.

[myra]

1) What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.
2) Always trust your feelings.
3) Life is a battle between good and evil people.

My own additions:
1) We’re all God’s children. No, we are all God’s creation. Jesus says some are children of Satan.
2) Follow your heart. No. The heart is deceitfully wicked. Who can know it. Follow the Spirit and Word of Truth.
3) There is “your” truth. No. There is YOUR perception. There is absolute truth.

[JoshuaPatrickGarrett]

The veil for one world government and religion. Nothing new here.

[congoknight]

This is masculine nature not human nature.

[jennifer]

I’m so Sorry you can’t see this video from the perspective of someone other than the dominant group. The resistance to recognizing multicultural qualities is not a threat to you. You will be okay.

[rzrwiresunrise]

Nearly six minutes of absolute piffle. How does this man have a career

[elinope]

I want a very young wife, she will benefit greatly from an extreme head start. Over and over, experts eventually agree with me when I disagree with experts.