Difference Between An Emotional Affair And Friendship

The question is not about whether a husband can have a female friend or a wife can have a male friend. The better question is, should they? How close should they be as friends?

Let’s examine the research and see what it says. If you are reading this because you think you have touched the line between friends and fling, or that your spouse is developing emotions for someone else, then be sure you stick around until the end. I will give you access to a free guide to understanding affairs.

What Is Emotional Cheating?
Emotional cheating is when you look to someone other than your spouse to fulfill you in areas that only your spouse should satisfy. In other words, emotional affairs occur when a person needs the other person in their life to provide them with something that their spouse should be giving them. How does this apply to opposite-sex friendships?

Interestingly, research indicates that men rely more on their wives for emotional support and well-being. According to research, women are more likely to have a support system outside of their marriage. In contrast, men are most likely to turn only to their wives in times of hardship for that emotional need. I think that begs the question for all of us to consider.

Am I a good friend to my spouse? Am I giving them the physical and emotional support they need so they will not feel the need to look elsewhere? Take a moment to reflect on that.

On top of that, women are more likely to go to other women about emotional issues, whereas men are less likely to talk to their male friends about the same problem. They tend to seek the guidance and friendship of women.

So what does all of this mean? One can surmise from the research the following for both genders, but especially men. If someone does not receive the physical and emotional support they need from their spouse, the temptation is to turn to someone else, especially a man seeking a woman to be a friend for them.

It starts with finding a friend at work and connecting on shared interests. When sharing those facts turns into sharing feelings, you’re on a slippery slope to entering into an affair. It happens to women too. While women may have more protective measures because they have more female friends to turn to, there is still equal temptation and susceptibility to emotional affairs when friendship turns into emotional support lacking from a husband.

Despite that, research is also clear that both husbands and wives need friends outside of the marriage. Those friendships can lead to a happier and healthier life and marriage. So what are we to do?

Learn the 5 Secrets To Saving Your Marriage:

Marriage Helper Workshops:

Learn more about our Marriage Saving Workshops:

More Free Resources:

Facebook:

Instagram:

Relationship Radio Podcast:

It Starts With Attraction Podcast:

Marriage Helper Quick Tips Podcast:

Become The Best Version Of Yourself At:

#MarriageHelper

MB01LFT0YRVFOAW

[seroeth]

A friend is someone your spouse will be happy to introduce to others in their close emotional circle, including you. An emotional affair partner is someone they will keep secret, usually just to themselves.

[steveklemettisdragracingvi]

You missed an important factor. The friendship should support the marriage and the loyalty to the marriage mate.

[richardslifer]

I had a partner who i caught sending “i love you, i need to see you” texts……she tried to explain it away as “oh, that’s just how we talk to each other…they’re just words” Needless to say, I walked away from that disloyal dumpster fire.

[somethingelsedoesmatter]

If you survey random people, women almost always say that men and women can be friends, while men nearly always say the opposite. There's a reason for that disparity.

These so-called friends are the first men to be there for the woman when her marriage has any rough patch or crisis. An ear to listen, a shoulder to cry on, a pair of hands to massage the stress away, a bed to forget about him for a while...

[Fairgreentube]

This perfectly illustrates what happens. Usually fear driven reactions tend to derail what we share with each other. The long term affect unfortunately pushes some to look elsewhere for guidance. The key is healthy boundaries, public places and think with your conscious mindset (adult/angel) verses your unconscious (child/evil) mindset. Then openly share with your spouse what transpired. Remember your spouse is your best friend. They are your safe and familiar place. They’re your home. Don’t burn your home down so you can live in a temporary apartment.

[jak]

We have to be mindful that the question of “am I a good friend to my spouse….so they don’t feel the need to look elsewhere” doesn’t become a justification for what is a lack of accountability on their part with an absence of protective measures, boundaries, commitment and open communication.

[Elleefedois-irug]

The end of the video is unfair to the cheated spouse. If someone's spouse is unwillingly to end a friendship that makes the other spouse uncomfortable, there is NOTHING we can do but preserve our dignity.

[brightpage]

Omg I once dated a guy who had a female best friend and felt so uncomfortable! It was clear that even his family was confused as to what either of them were doing dating other people when the generational values were clearly “marry your best friend”. She wasn’t as svelte as I was so I got that he didn’t realize how attracted he was to her but he lit up anytime and every time she came up. Lit up and relaxed. I told him, “you should marry your best friend.”

[mariaakopyan-dignifieddivo]

We all definitely need emotional support and can't look to our spouse to be our everything, but you're right that there is a fine line that needs to be established and communicated so that a friendship doesn't turn into an affair. Thanks for sharing this video!

[andytaylor]

My now former wife is a covert narcissist and maintained “friendships” with several former male “friends”. She had a group of friends I knew and knew me, but a group that was hidden!

[warrens]

I think that most affairs start with a friendship. So no surprise that this is a red flag. Why should you wait until a line is crossed to end the friendship? It's always right at the line from the beginning. You stand on the edge of the cliff and saying "I'm safe here".

[soul]

There is never justification for cheating on a spouse, either emotionally or physically.

[imsungjaesmelody.thesnorte]

Honestly emotional infidelity hurts more than physical one. In many physical ones, it was in heat of moment and due to primal desires. No strings attached. But emotional one takes time and constant effort. You cannot come back from that. I’m not saying physical cheating is in any way not hurtful but I think I would be much more devastated if my partner was seeking peace from someone else, telling them about his deep feelings rather than if he just slept with them one night.

[skiba]

I thought I had a really good friend. It wasn't until they left their abusive partner i realised I was used as an emotional affair

[jmiller]

That is mind blowing ! I have never got emotional support from anyone I was Married to .

[aminagaliyeva]

This is very helpful. Thank you so much

[PinkYellowGreen]

If your husband is telling other people about his emotions and feelings constantly, versus talking to you first...why even be married to him? You and him need to have a bond that is closer than any other relationship he has with another woman. Your husband can have female friends but when his "friends" are talked to more, spent more time with, and being told his inner most thoughts and feelings....he lacks the ability to bond adequately in my eyes. He is on a slippery slope that clearly says he's likely to have an affair. You have to have a man that knows how to protect your relationship....this is demonstrated during the courting process and heightens in marriage. If he cant protect a relationship, he wont be able to protect a marriage.

[weskirkland]

An affair or cheating = Anything you would NOT do right in front of your spouse.

[derfholl]

The underline issue where a person violates a marriage or relationship is immaturity. Not the lack of boredom or being steal.

[apco]

I am called insecure because I question my husband's friendship with females.😟