Eight is Great: Teaching Kids About Sex

[HelpforCSA]

Excellent! Thank you for making these available and giving practical advice on how to discuss this topic at an age-appropriate level for children.

[shockofthenew]

I totally agree with this. I was taught about sex at age 6-7 in a way which was very open, but not gratuitous. We learned in basic terms what the act involved, that it could cause pregnancy, and that it was only for consenting adults who loved each other and were ready to make a big decision in their lives. More detail about protection, STIs, relationships etc. was added in stages as we got older. It didn't freak me out to learn about it – at that age I was learning new things about the world every single day and this was just another thing I learned. We already teach kids about violence, wars and many other difficult things. Teaching them about sex and relationships should be standard. If kids can learn about Henry VIII having his wives decapitated, they can learn about sex and bodily autonomy.

Taking the mystery out of sex is really important. I was a child who liked to push boundaries and was very independant, so having something be 'taboo' would immediately make me want to explore it. Something 'secret' and 'off-limits' would be tantalising and irresistible to me. I also began to hear about sex from other kids when I was around that age, and there were a lot of rumours and heresay. As a girl who hit puberty early I had already experienced public sexual harassment (e.g. stares, whistles) starting from age 9-10. Growing up in the internet age I had discovered hardcore porn by the time I was 11. Please understand that this is inevitable. No matter how careful parents think they are it is inevitable. It's important to accept that reality instead of living in denial.

But because I knew what was happening, knew what my boundaries were, had high self-esteem and knew I could talk openly with adults I trusted, I was able to navigate the difficult world we live in with minimal damage. As a precocious kid with a rebellious streak, who insisted on my independence, knowing that my parents respected me enough to trust me with this information, enough to trust me to make the right decisions as long as I could turn to them for support – all this set me up to be smart, savvy and self-assured. I was able to say no, and had the confidence to leave situations I didn't like. If something serious happened, I would have felt able to tell my parents without fearing judgement or feeling like there was a line I couldn't cross.

Without these resources, kids are left vulnerable to manipulation, confusion and fear. I have many friends who were not as lucky as I was. I'm not a parent yet myself, but I urge parents to reconsider their prejudices on this topic. Don't leave your child vulnerable because you're too squeamish to talk about sex.

[jameslee]

My question is It's a 9-year-old Knows Everything About Sex It's a 9-year-old kid consent To a older guy or lady And they both agree with sex is that okay
Especially if they wear protection And do it for pleasure