AITA for not telling my mom that my marriage was a cover-up?

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Story Name: AITA for not telling my mom that my marriage was a cover-up?

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[BellaQuiz]

rest of this post:He is now living as himself for the first time.
Since this is his first pride he was so excited about it and showing off his first boyfriend, and as his ex wife I was so happy about him and left comments on his public posts.
Now, IDK how my mom found it but she texted me ANGRY asking why I was still taking to my "slur slur slur godless cheating ex" I told her that I'm happy he is happy, but she still insisted, and then I told her that I knew from the beginning.
That just set her off because she had put a lot of effort into helping us in our marriage but it was a lie from the beginning, I just told her it wasn't a lie to me, I came up with the idea. She called me a lot of names and said "I WILL MAKE SURE EVERYONE HERE KNOWS ABOUT YOUR BETRAYAL" I was just like "ok".
I don't think I did anything wrong but I've been wrong many times before so I wonder if her feelings are justified, she has been a good mother to me after all.

[milissadaniels]

NTA the fact that she blew up proves the point more worried about what things look like then your happiness.

[angelinascott]

the marriage wasn't fake if they has to divorce, but it was a marriage of convenience not of love. like marrying a man who is older because of religion or financial benefits. the type of hate that the mom showed would be why it was done

[agirlwithglasses]

NTA!
Ops response made me laugh “ok” lmao . And it’s kind of nice seeing op and her ex having a good relationship.

[cassandrafoley]

the way nope. If they weren't so messed up to begin with, mom wouldn't be so mad.
Good on OP for getting the hell out of there.

[sarahprice]

It sounds like the arrangement was a best case scenario for both of you, and worked out without any interested party getting hurt (family members not being interested parties). Congratulations to both of you.

[suan]

Now it's time for OP to live her life as well away from that toxic environment ❤

[johnlmorse]

It's great that you both had someone that cared enough to share your ture life with, the shame is that all of those people you grow up with in that church is still hiding their ture self so they can fit in.

[table.]

Yeah, your own mother trying to get you in an arranged marriage with a much older man specifically from the same church (because god forbid she finds and like someone with DIFFERENT OPINIONS!!) is a massive red flag for abuse from your mum. She’s evil

[ShakinandBacon]

This should be a book. Great story. I’m glad you’re both now living your authentic lives. ❤

[Stuffyim]

Honestly, they did that perfectly.
Lived happily casting the toxic people in the dark while surrounding yourself with people you can be your honest self with (the friends)

[fifteendozenalleyroses]

Nta the homophobe had no right to know as she clearly doesn’t support so why would he be comfortable telling her. All OP did was not out her friend

[fionna_cool_girl]

NTA. OP was fine with being a beard too keep her friend safe. That's nobody else's business

[rivers_cuomobutfreaky]

FIRST THE DEER CLIP, TJEN THE DOG CLIP, AND NOW A CAT CLIP?!??!

[averycheesypotato]

NTA- you & your ex’s personal lives should never have been anyone else’s to judge or control. But as you had no means to live your lives free from such religious hypocrites, you found a solution that worked for both of you. As long as you both knew and agreed upon the arrangement, there is no shame in it!

[anglicalchemist]

Nta. She forced you to do it and he's lucky to have a friend like you

[cchastant]

I like to imagine OP and her ex with years spent cuddling on couches and beds, not just selling the marriage, but enjoying each other's friendship. And now that they are away from the toxic families, getting to be themselves. She wanted to avoid marriage to a creepy older man, he needed a "safe" woman. Sounded like they agreed to the ground rules before the marriage, rules to protect them both from things they didn't want to deal with. And agreed again on when to separate, and how they would do it. And they are still friends! Better than I managed, sadly.

Although in my case, I may be too truthful from the start, which they all think is marvelous... until they realize that I really was truthful from the start. Heh... guess it's too much for most guys to own up "late in the game" to not being a truthful. Ah, well!

[themayhemofmadness]

They both knew what they wanted out of the marriage. And they both got it. She was saved from being forced to marry some old creep, and he was saved from possibly being physically abused by his family, should he come out.

The fact that they were able to move away, separate themselves from the conservative church and toxic family members, get divorced and finally live their lives true to themselves, all while staying friends, marks this as a very successful marriage.

In that regard, it wasn’t fake at all. I wish them both all the luck and all the best in the world.

[musical_costumer]

We just not gonna talk about that cat pissing on the car?

[dylanf]

NTA. Seems like a win/win to me. You get out of marrying old gross men and he got out of being persecuted for who he is.