John Mulaney | I Was Determined Not To Go To Rehab #shorts

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[IbarakiPlays]

I can imagine there was half of the people who heard the "stop drinking" and were fine with it but heard the "and smoking weed" the WHOLE room was silent as death 😂

[aham]

you know when you say something and as it’s coming out of your mouth you hear how insane it sounds? yeah that’s very much the vibe “my plan was to destabilize the leader lady” gives

[AzarathMetreon]

“I’ll stop doing my drugs if you stop doing yours” is actually a very fair deal. I’d take it if I were leader lady.

[CanadianFH]

That last bit reminds me of a book written by a certain bass player. The members of his band were telling him to quit drinking, when 2 of then were high on coke. 😂

[GiselleKlara]

Love how that even when (by his own admission) he wasn’t sober, and being caught by surprise, he still had the brainpower to come up with a plan. Not a good plan; but at least a plan! “Destabilise the Leader Lady”

[wvp]

John turning out to be an active addict was both disappointing and completely understandable. What a strange world we live in.

[BillyRaines-rp]

‘Prepped for me’ 😂 what, like when you prep for a colonoscopy?

[Imbatmn]

He is one of the last people that i would think had done drugs.

[californiadreaming]

My son signed himself into outpatient rehab at 19. Claimed it was all my imagination until I got a urine sample of 2.8 after he drove home. I didn’t even think he looked as drunk as usual. When him and his dad were confronted by the urine sample they both walked out never to return. His best friend’s family who were also alcoholic turned him against me saying how terrible I was for suggesting rehab.

[dallascopp]

My mom said the same thing to me when I asked her to stop her to quit smoking cigarettes. She asked “did you quit drinking, ” as if I was an alcoholic who couldn’t go a few hours without a beer. And the funny part was when she said that, I hadn’t been out with my friends in well over a month. I still think about my mom’s audacity to say that to me from time to time 😂

[thedistinguished]

now that he isnt on coke you gotta speed him up

[efrainrodriguez]

Father Time has not been kind to Drake Bell 😅

[steveconkey]

What worked for my daughter was jail, and being left there unable to make bond herself.

[Jeudaos]

john to the gang: i'll go to rehab, when all YOU stop drinking,
Me: that sounds reasonable. '
AND stop smoking weed!'
Me: SORRY, you're staying on drugs mate, it how it has to be. I guess you win.

[CrocusSeal]

I mean....he could have just gotten up and left. What could they have done? Unless he was in trouble with the law and it was either jail or rehab

[usernamechecksout]

Why does he sound so flamboyant and gay if he has a wife lol

[MouthyMama]

Fair is fair, John. Alcohol should be a scheduled substance LONG before others. Prohibition should NEVER have been lifted. Too many have been killed needlessly at the hands of alcoholic idiots. Also, I'd MUCH rather have ANY other substance users for a neighbor than anyone who drinks alcohol. You don't see heroin users or weed smokers beating their children in an intoxicated stupor or being pushy assholes. They're happy, laid back and content. Even when they're dope sick (for daily opiate users, ) & the twack &/or crack stars are ALWAYS awake & keeping an eye on the neighborhood. Drunks just destroy everything they come in contact with, but it's totally legal, they rarely get the punishment they deserve and everyone pretends that it's not an ENORMOUS issue. And I'm far from the only one with this opinion. Our town has been hard hit by the dual opiate and meth waves, but they get up, take care of their families, work regular jobs and give the neighborhood no issues. The drinkers? They come out of the bar shit faced, drive the TWO BLOCKS home, scream down the block at 3-4:00am, run over children walking to school (or worse) on their way to get MORE alcohol even though they're STILL drunk waking up and leech off of government support systems to feed their beast... Sloppy, hateful, lazy, self important --There's just no excuse for it. Bodily autonomy is something I fully support for educated and consenting ADULTS, but CONTROL YOURSELVES and be accountable for your actions! Stricter punishments, regulations and forced rehab are sorely needed for the hundreds of thousands (or more) hidden alcoholics in the U.S. You should be doing at least 6m for DUI, not 3 days & you're free to do it again. And start forcing them on Antabuse and Vivitrol or other forms of MAT like is done to any other person with an SUD. HOLD THEM ACCOUNTABLE. Period. 😤😡🤬

[VictorHernandez-ycww]

I promise I’m not even trying to hate on the guy I bet he’s a pretty decent fella but watching him is like listening to a normal random person having a regular convo about the weather. Like I was still waiting for the “jokes” idk maybe it’s just me but this man is not funny not even a little bit

[CaliforniaColeman]

Exactly. I will stop taking my drugs when you stop calling your absurd dose of potent prescription drugs your medicine.

[MainGoldDragon]

ive never seen this man talk about something not related to drugs