old enough to understand (instrumental)

Original song: Pluto Projector - Rex Orange County

BG photo: Clannad - After story

[thebeans]

"You never realize how important moments are until they're memorys"

[NeruHere]

"The good times of today are
the sad thoughts of tomorrow."
-Bob Marley

[idaniaperalta]

"i like walking in the rain because it hides my tears
i love walking in the sun because it brightens my smile"
-Mr.Bean.

[rangshii]

*Yin and Yang. Without sadness… Happiness wouldn’t be a thing. Without night, daylight would kill everything. Without evil, good would not be such a thing. We need both opposites. There is no such thing as perfection.*

[countedlol]

This song started in my head after helping my crush get together with my best friend. seeing them both makes me just stand there and say "damm did i do a good thing?" and yes i. did but it did hurt really hurt, i had to keep my will and emotions up high to make them not worry. i knew she would be happy with him i knew it very well. i dont mind being the shadow, in fact i would rather be there for her when she needs help and congratulate her achievements far away.








Update after 2 months... - I...felt happy and sad actually the music started in my head once again. At the end of my graduation i saw them both laughing and happy... i saw how my best friend treated her. just the way i told him to... seeing him introduce himself to her parents made me heartbroken but in joy... if you get what i mean. I could just stand there again and again and just admire her for one last time before everything is gone. i know im not needed because i promised her that ill stay as long as she is happy and looks to me i achieved it... now im here in a lonely silent room wishing them a happy happy future.




Its been weeks... i haven't done any progress in my life... i cant stop thinking about her...


Another update dudes... i lost my smile, i lost my joy and looks like i'm not really into with this situation. Everything i see around is love and just black and white you know? My friends are concerned about me and i just could hardly reply to them im working on myself yeah thats for sure but its still missing something... i cant like working out, living healthy or just simply loving the self time of your life... yet... something is still not ready for me to keep going you know?... something is just staying there which i dont know why... it's confusing me hahaha i'm not just gonna update anything else i just keep on helping people while i walk alone in the streets isolating in one bench... al l i could see in my insta is her and bestfriend ahving the best time. And im just here pathetically doing nothing but to do self time. All i could say is "Wow congrats for them". Few day goes by and my friend cames in with a concerned look on me for looking like i haven't showed in months. They 4 were in tears of how, the "Joyful Counted" turned into a sadistic dude who works in the office 3 months with no breaks. They couldn't help but hugged me and looked at me crying of how they were sorry for me and how it concerned them alot. They stayed for an hour and they just felt sorry for me and i cant even hardly look at them. They were just in that much of sympathy they kept saying sorry like it was their fault. And i can't even say anything to them. Affter hours in the evening they learned my room while i look like i have been sitting in the chair and they didnt diturbed me atll... they just left me food and thats it.... i owe them alot for this... i just wished that i was able to take actions... right now im trying or just doing my best too.... look up and try to at least get myself together...




Quick update for you all.... i met this one girl... she shines the most... i found her when i was at a coffee shop... she approached me out of the blue which confuses me because i dont know her at some point of way.... and then i realized.... she was my friend a friend of mine that i met on school... we dont meet pretty interact with each other honestly we just said hi and then to her its a frineds thing now.... she said hi and said how was i? i replied wit hthe most coldest thing on eart because i didnt had any energy but dont worry im not depressed any longer... i just lost my smile. But this one girl told me if she could add me any way because we are friends but dont have any mutuals on any social media at all and so we did. She kept texting me like shes the only one thinking about me or osme sort... but mainly she told me that she was worried about me like... i changed she said.... and so she stayed like we bonded like soulmates... she kept talkting me making me laugh at some point and mainly... for the past few weeks i slowly and slowly felt happy she made me smile again we could talk for hours and she wont get tired of me... but yeah she just makes me smile







Hey dudes, its me Counted again... just updating you guys for a very a great news... my life is getting better. I have achieved it. I never thought i would never get it. My Joy and Happiness i never thought i wont get it any more. But i got it.. From her from the people i met along the way of my path... it all started when i lost her... now i got more than just one... i got close friends whom i cosnidered familly aswell.... She is healing me from my past... she loved me, udnerstood and we are in the most healthy and mature relationship... she shines just like sun... and she makes it brighter each day... I just wanna say thank you for all the comment sections who was there to tell me to keep going... and keep moving forward... i owe it to you guys alot.. i just came back right now because i was busy to my schedules i started my competitive squad... and my girl was there... so does everyone i cared.



Sad update for you all

We broke up, i have failed to fight for a relationship that was supposed to be my one happy story, i didn't know. She didnt trust me... our whole relationship was a lie. it was a one sided. she ddint trust me at all dudes.... i cant believe im going back t to the same place that i was trying my best to get back up with


Well miss me? Still not on the happy phase you know.. its been 8 months and all i can do is just live a normal life, traumatized on every move i make that is including "love" i will never love again the same way as i loved someone back then.



How long was i gone? its been a month or a year to be honest. Living a good not terrible life. Me and the old crush i had are good friends especially my best friend... i told her a lot of things about her and what should he do to make their relationship stronger. I love it, i loved the feeling of helping. They bond more better and nicer than so many things that you can imagine, it feels like i watched them grow. As a best friend of em both. Still have that feeling of being in that one position where they are happy and im just there... looking at them behind as they share laughs and joy. Don't get me wrong i respect them both. i was there if they need advices, tips and ways to make it more better. Now i feel like im just a lost soul, always there but can never find himself along the way.l

[youknowyoulovehim]

"Don't cry because it's over
smile because it happened"
-Dr. Seuss

[Transgender_waffl]

Depression isn't forever, take your time, take it step by step

[The_Boiled_One]

when you finally died knowing everything is okay now and you can rest forever

[rockpaper]

As sad as it is, I have come to realize that things will never be the same as they were. I do not know what to make of that or what I should feel about it. This song really makes it very melancholic for me, for what happened yesterday, days, weeks, months, and years agos, the joys of childhood and being teenagers. It cannot be replicated nor replaced. I don't know if I can have something like that again and it scares me...

[misMay]

This is making me feel an emotion I haven't felt in a long time.
It's actually kinda nice...
Thank you

[schoolprojects]

Ive been dating this girl for 18 months and its been the best relationship ive ever been in by a large margin... wouldnt have traded it for the world, but ive been slowly losing myself and losing my battle with my brain, no matter how much love we have it wint be able to chanhe the fact that even in our 20's we arent mature enough for the adult relationship we have been trying to support ive learned so mucb from her now including love isnt always enough that we need space to heal from our pasts without each other so we can have a future... never posted comments in my life idk why i am now but maybe ill find this one day and smile back on my pain with love and happiness for choosing myself for once and make myself whole again❤

[alycollotzi]

I was listening to this when I got an empathic message from a loved one, perfect timing. I felt a new emotion

[TheRavenClanb.c]

"A broken Weapon wont save you, this place serves as a tomb to one of us, Let it be you"

[enaaweena_]

There’s something about this song that is so calming, it just makes you cry and remember old pastimes that were happy, but now gone. It feels like a comforting presence is with you, and there is nobody here to judge you for your feelings. Just you and the song, a moment you can rarely get in life. Atleast that’s how I see it.

To whoever is reading this, I wish the best for you. I know you are trying your hardest, and I believe in you. I’m sure almost everyone here does. There are greater things to come in life, although it may not seem like it, I can only tell you that even if your life doesn’t go the way you want, or if everything just seems unfair, there are and will always be good things, whether it be past or present, big or small. I’m very proud of you, and you deserve to feel loved, cared for, and acknowledged. After everything you have gone through, whether it be self conflict, relationship problems, mental/physical trauma, etc, you deserve good things in life. We all do. I may just be a stranger on the Internet, but one thing that we all can sympathize with, is the fact that all of us have struggles/struggled at some point in life. You deserve to feel happy, sad, angry, and confused. You deserve to be treated like a normal human being, because you are, we all are. To whoever might be reading this, I want you to know that I am so proud of you, I’m proud of you for coming this far, I’m proud of you for being here, im proud of you for being strong, although it may not seem like it, I’m proud of you for not giving up, atleast not yet. I hope that you’ll soon find happiness in life and others, and that you can break free from that barrier that keeps you from being who you really are. Let your scars heal slowly, but surely. I believe in you.

[cheguevara]

my brother always plays this song whenever he's about to sleep, we both lived together on a boarding house, but sadly its been 2 months since his passing

[valentincristiano]

Using this as the video background really makes me cry like a bitch, Clannad was a really beautiful show that i wish to never forget.

[rangshii]

“Happiness will never live forever. That means… Sadness can never live forever.”

-A Wise person

[ynslittlebrother]

Silently waiting for this to blow up cause its AMAZING keep up the good work ❤

[Tommy_]

We only appreciate something once it's truly gone

[zydyze]

To the person who read this,

It's been hard for you, I know, and it makes me sad that you don't see yourself in the way I see you. Sometimes they are things in life that cause us to loose ourselves, and the way you have is so unimaginable painful. I miss your smile, the way your eyes light up the whole room just by the sound of your laughter. I miss the way you accepted the way you look in the mirror without cursing yourself out about how ugly you look. I miss the way you didn't think of yourself as a failure because everyone makes mistakes, we all have flaws and we all aren't perfect. It's painful to see that no one around you seems to see the pain trough your eyes, but, stranger, I do, I see how heavy your heart is and how comforting the sadness for you might be, how afraid your heart is of happiness because it disappears in the end, right? You don't know how much impact you have in this world and it's sad to see that your demons fight against you and want to take over you. Because you do make change, it's something so simple and little that brightens up someone's whole world, it can be a small smile from your lips, the way you look at things you're passionate about, the way you make yourself eat even though it's been hard for you lately, the way you zoom out and go in your own world, you brighten up my world by reading this, it means a lot to me that you're here, existing, but I don't want you to just exist, you deserve to feel alive. You deserve to get up in the morning and feel good about yourself. You deserve to feel something- to feel every damn second alive in this lifetime. It's heartbreaking that you think you're not capable of being loved.I know it's tiring, your mentally tired, but dont your younger self deserve good things? look back at your eyes that used to be full of hope, look back on those dreams. Don't let yourself fall, you deserve better. We will both fight, I will fight for you. I won't let those demons get to you. You can hold on to me, I won't let you down :). Whenever you feel lonely, then look at the sky, I always look at it and think about you. Yes, you, because it makes me happy that there's someone looking right back, maybe we can't see each other but I can feel your presence here with me and that's enough for me, because I am glad your heart is beating and you're still fighting. You're so much stronger thank you think, you didn't leave your spot on this earth even if you wanted to, you belong here, even though it doesn't feel like it, when you don't feel like belonging than build your own home here, put all your love in it and dreams. Think of you as a star when you feel alone, you shine because your heart is good, no matter what mistake you made, no matter about the past you had, you're one of the stars that shine bright in the universe because you're heart is beautiful, that's why the demons in your mind wants to have it. As one of the stars you see others stars, maybe they have felt the same way as you do at some point in there life, but they lighten up the universe with each other's presence. You're a star for me, maybe you don't see it yourself but I can see it, you're beautiful from inside and out, your body is beautiful the way it is. You make me happy by reading this, you make me feel something by your presence and when you can make me feel that way than you also make other people feel that way about you too. I hope you stay for yourself and don't let your story get written by others but by yourself, it's your story nottheirs. As you can see, I say a lot of "I hope" because I have hope for you even if you don't have it for yourself, I see hope in you even though you might want to give up. That's why I hope you won't see the world in darkness and will see it colorful again, I hope I will give you a glimpse of hope and make the world you see a bit colorful for today. My favorite color is purple, and I hope the next time you see the color purple you will think about my words. If someone left you than don't blame yourself, don't think you weren't enough, don't lower yourself for someone u deserve better I love you trough all my words and I hope you let it happen in your heart. Love is scary, I know, maybe you heart had been broken once and since then you wanted to be rather numb than feel ever again, it hurts me how you punish yourself, does it not deserve love? Because YOU DO deserve love, please forgive yourself, it's not your fault that the demons want to take over your beautiful heart. You're not a bad person for distancing yourself from others, but you deserve someone to talk to, you deserve someone to listen. I am listening, you can tell me what's wrong. It's everything, isn't it? There's something pulling your heartstrings on the ground and no one seems to understand how misunderstood you feel, it's heartbreaking to know that I am behind the screen and can't give you a hug, that's why I will give you a big warm virtual hug and send you lots of love :). You matter. You are worthy. You are loved. You deserve good things. You deserve someone to listen. You deserve to eat and drink. You deserve to feel good and alive. You deserve to smile. You deserve a hug. You deserve to be all the things you want to be, because you deserve to have and feel good things happening to you and have a fulfilled life. I know I might not know you personally but I care about you so much, I write this because I want you to stay here with me, I want you to hold on a little longer because you matter so much to me, because I will not let you give up on yourself. I want you to see that you should not give up on yourself because you DESERVE GOOD THINGS. I want you to look back on the time when you were a kid, you didn't give up when you tried to swim for the first time, you didn't give up when you tired to walk for the first time and fell, you never gave up on yourself, you always kept on pushing forwards, so why can't you now?