What Does the Bible Say About Divorce and Remarriage?

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What does the Bible teach about divorce and remarriage? That’s our topic today on the BEAT.

Hey what’s up everyone my name is Allen Parr and so today we are dealing with a very sensitive subject. Statistics show that over 50% of all couples experience divorce, which means not only are they affected by it but their children are as well. I recognize there are a variety of views on it so my goal is to provide a balanced yet biblical view on the subject.

With that being said, the first thing I want to say is that…

1. Divorce is not the unforgivable sin
a. I would argue that it’s not a sin at all in some situations. We’ve taken this one sin and have shunned and shamed people and caused them to feel worse than they already do about the deep pain associated with a divorce.
b. We need to be about the business of restoring people who are broken and reminding them that if God is big enough to forgive other sins then He is big enough to forgive the sin of divorce.
2. Grounds for Divorce
a. With that being said I would argue that the Bible provides four grounds for divorce and remarriage.
b. Adultery – Mt. 19:9 – Jesus says that if a spouse commits adultery then the other spouse has the option to divorce and remarry although reconciliation is always preferred if the offending spouse is truly repentant.
c. Abandonment – 1 Cor. 7:12-15
d. Death – 1 Cor. 7:39 – Paul says that if a spouse dies then the living spouse is obviously no longer bound and is free to remarry.
e. Divorce as an Unbeliever – 2 Cor. 5:17 – When we become Christians God does not hold us accountable for anything we did before we were saved.
3. The X-Factor
a. With all of that being said I believe there is one x-factor here and that is the heart of God. I am convinced that, although there are consequences to our decisions, GOD ALWAYS RESPONDS TO A HEART OF REPENTANCE WITH GRACE.
b. We see this in the life of David. We see this with how God dealt with Israel who sinned against God repeatedly and yet God called them back to repentance.
4. Finally my advice to someone who has experienced the devastating pain of divorce is
a. Go out of your way to shield your children from the pain of the divorce as much as you can.
b. But more importantly, NEVER WASTE A FAILURE! Take the lessons that you’ve learned [see what part you played, if any, in the breakdown of the marriage] and turn around and help someone else because if you don’t you are allowing the enemy to get the victory on the front end and on the back end by causing you to hide behind your failures and being too ashamed to share your wisdom with someone else.

If you found this video helpful…

[Aelfrix]

Tip for guy by a guy on how to stay in a healthy good marriage: Listen to a woman’s feelings, don’t put work over family, and get some emotional intelligence. Don’t fight or yell if you have to discuss stuff! God be with y’all

[nfrost]

I’m over here Thankful God didn’t leave it up to the people here in the comment section to define sin.

[morningglory]

Folks this is so messed up first of all the bible does not say you have to commit adultery to keep from comiting adultery . What it does say is a woman is bound to her husband as long as he shall live . and if anybody marries her while her husband is living they are comiting adultery

[Lioness_Es]

So it's best to stay unmarried and childfree to bypass all of this unnecessary baggage?..

[carolynmojica]

My dad was a pastor, and my brother and I were victims of their divorce. The whole church basically shunned us (we grew up Baptist), my dad ever since then in some way abandoned us because he no longer cared to be a part of our lives any more. I can testify of the pain you live with your whole life. God makes all things new, He forgives us and gives us grace, and even though the pain is there, it’s liveable. My father never re married but my mom did, and 3 years after, she lost her husband due to a heart attack. Right now, I am married, we have our firstborn in heaven and are expecting a baby girl soon. God blesses us as long as we live under His shadow.

[yverenee]

You have to consider the historical context when interpreting the Bible. In biblical times women didn't have rights. They were only a little better than slaves. They couldn't choose who they married or when they married. they couldn't own property. their husbands could divorce them for any old reason and without the protection of a husband or father, women were usually destitute and reduced to prostitution or worse.
Read Deuteronomy 24 where Moses required men to give their wives a bill of divorce. This was helpful in that while man wanted divorce for petty reasons, God used Moses to protect women (i.e. men's "hardness of hearts"). The allowance for remarriage was a way to protect women! Notice how the text states that it is an abomination for a woman to go back to her former husband, not an abomination for her to re-marry--this was obvious to people in Jesus day and its pretty obvious now when we consider what we know about God.
He is merciful, right? And Jesus spent a LOT of time showing the significance of women which is what led to his discussion with the Pharisees to begin with and why God hates divorce--because it usually left the women suffering.
By clarifying the acceptable reasons for divorce, Jesus was holding men accountable! God hates adultery (also understood as a form of idolatry) and divorced Israel! Did God himself sin? I think not!! The pharisees were putting away their wives, most of the time without a divorce, leaving them without shelter, clothing, or protection which was basically a death sentence in those days. Divorce was a common but different practice among the gentiles and Paul addressed that kerfuffle in 1 Corinthians 7-- so it didn't need to be explained to them in relation to the law as it had to be explained to the Jews.

We have to be extremely careful not to force our 21st century ideals on biblical interpretation and follow the WHOLE counsel of God, not just the verses that feed our particular bias. If God could forgive David for adultery with Bathsheba, the murder of Uriah, and still call him a man after God's heart then that blows out most arguments against adultery being a continuous sin, otherwise it would make sense for people to go kill their former spouse so they could stop "sinning" (just because David murdered Uriah that didn't make it less of a sin. Sin doesn't work like that!) If a divorced woman was not permitted to remarry then it was a death sentence--thru no fault of her own but because of her husband's sin.
On a sidenote 1 Corinthians 7 is clear as day, it talks about 2 married believers and then unbelievers married to believers. To apply the 1st situational restraints to the second condition is not what Paul was saying and is fairly obvious just from a cursory reading of the text.
The point of Romans 7 is not marriage, it is an explanation of how Christians are dead to the law and it should be understood within that context. If something is an "ex" it no longer is current so it doesn't make sense to apply an "ex husband" to what is stated here about a husband that lives.

Christians today need to get over themselves and stop putting periods where God puts grace and commas. Jesus is the fulfillment of the Law thru His life and sacrifice. We are not made righteous by obedience to the Law. We are made righteous by our faith in Him. This constant bickering about divorce puts more emphasis on the law than it does on grace. Divorce is not the unpardonable sin and remarriage is understood where divorce is allowed. Jesus would prefer forgiveness and thats why he mentioned Moses' allowance for hard hearts-- but-when we become believers we get NEW hearts, NEW life, and a clean slate. This might make legalistic folks BIG mad but that's just the beauty of grace. Be encouraged!

[ConaaaMC]

After coming to know Jesus i broke up with a girl of 11 months who i was living with and worked hard to work things out with my wife because that is what the bible teaches. I agree so strongly that we are not to make anyone feel worse than they already do, it is our job as Christians to love not judge.

Luke 16:18 "Anyone who divorces his wife and marries another woman commits
adultery, and the man who marries a divorced woman commits adultery."

[timothythompson]

Divorce is never discussed in the Christian churches. Jesus never mentioned abortion or homosexuality. But, he gave extensive instruction on divorce. What did he see as the greater social evil?

[smoothsoulbrotha]

You forgot abuse but that still counts as a form of abandonment. It is an absolute abandonment of one's duties in the marriage.

[TherWeatherby]

Yes, I Corinthians chapter 7 says to remain married to an unbeliever if they choose to remain, but and If they depart, the believer is Not under bondage.

[defendingthefaith.]

My sister in-law is getting married for the 5th time next week. We refuse to go to her wedding. She called us hypocrites and unchristian. She messed up all 4 of her previous marriages. The guy she is marrying has been married once. And is a widow. I believe he is the only one that is allowed to get remarried. But not to her.

[Meekabird]

if you could remarry then it would actually say the word in Scripture

[Meekabird]

From the beginning divorce was not so but in the beginning there was no sin either but thanks to Eve... the Bible doesn't not allow divorce but you can separate. God does forgive divorce but the key word is adultery. Since divorce was not so then the only thing you can do is separate but if you have sex with someone else it adultery. God commanded us not to separate but if so remain single. There's no way out but death... believe me I wish there was a way out!!!

[wassha]

I’ve been married for about one year and 4 months to my wife. We have a newborn and she wants a divorce. I truly believe that she has a lot of mental and emotional health problems that she refuses to deal with from her past, and has dumped all of her hurt, pain, and trauma on me. She also has been showing signs of being depressed and of a narcissist.

I know that marriage isn’t perfect and takes lots of practice and patience. I’m here and have never wavered in my faith that God can turn this thing around.

I have never said that I wanted to leave my marriage every time something didn’t go my way or if my wife did something that I didn’t like.

I know that God has put us together for a reason, and I’m praying that He continues to do a work on the both of us. Whatever issues my wife is going through, I pray that He can help her because she has shut me totally out of her life and is trying to do the same when it comes to our son.

I also believe that she is at the point, that she will not listen to anyone. She has blocked my entire family and church family off of Facebook. She’s running from something but refuses to communicate with me or anyone who gives her Godly advice and wisdom.

If she is one of those individuals that has to go back into the world for Satan to completely beat her up so that she can learn how to totally surrender and depend on God and not on her own self will, I will always be here to be her husband.

Unfortunately, I did have to leave our home to stay with my parents. She became physically violent towards me and has locked me out of our home.


For any believers in Christ who know the power of prayer, please keep us in prayer. All I want is my wife back. Any words of encouragement would be greatly appreciated.

[valwolve]

A husband’s unique role consists of three tasks: leadership, protection and provision. In fact, these may be the only unique abilities a man brings to the marriage relationship (beyond the obvious biological role). If he abdicates on any of these things, either allowing them to disappear altogether or forcing his wife to take over, he is less of a man for it. And she has less of a husband.

[dibab.]

Obviously you didn't get that one:

Mark 10:11 So He said to them, “Whoever divorces his wife and marries another commits adultery against her. 12 And if a woman divorces her husband and marries another, she commits adultery.”

Divorce and remarriage are two different things. One reason for so many divorce and remarriage is false teaching as yours.

[oliviaseed]

One more. If you are being physically abused, please get a DIVORCE.

[TheJude]

There is therefore now no condemnation to them which are in Christ Jesus, who walk not after the flesh, but after the Spirit ( Romans 8:1- full scripture: KJV)

[jamesba-xdxf]

you are dead wrong on point #4. it doesnt matter if you were a christian or non christian when you got married. if point 1, 2, and 3 dont apply you MUST remain single or be reconsiled to your spouse.

[bf]

your position in #2 = does not give the believing Christian grounds to remarry, just as you said reconciliation to the spouse is Gods' number one mode, if your not able to reconcile then you are to remain unmarried. This is a continuation of rules in Vs 10-15 !!!