Are the Dutch DIRECT OR Blatantly RUDE? My Opinion as An AFRICAN Girl Living in the Netherlands.

Hi Beautiful people,

In this video, I share my opinion on the directness of the Dutch people. This is based on my experience in the Netherlands. Leave a comment below and tell me what you think about this topic.

Check out my video on my experience as a black girl living in the Netherlands.

Lets connect on instagram and TikTok @d_beautyengineer

[AppleCore]

My Dutch grandmother was the queen of Dutch Directness. I have a billion examples, but the one that will stay with me forever is when she was on her deathbed (she had day's to live and was really doing badly, slipped in and out of consciousness), she looked at me and my family, who were all worried and wanted to be with her and make her comfortable in her dying moments...
and she just blatently said: "No need to look at me like that, I'm not dead yet. Give it another day or so."
And this was not intended jokingly, she was seriously annoyed with us and said what was on her mind. It still makes me laugh.

[williamgeardener]

The Dutch directness goes a long way. If it's obvious to everyone that you need help and a Dutch person offers you help, accept it. I once saw a person who had fallen and couldn't get up. A Dutch woman asked that person if she needed help getting up and they replied that they didn't need any help. So the woman just said "Ok" and went on her way, leaving that person lying there. That's also part of Dutch directness.

[ergberg]

I think we are often direct because we like to be efficiënt and get a message across. Doesn't mean we have to be rude about it, but we also don't want to talk for hours if we can move on to something different after discussing that certain subject in a few minutes .Especially when work related. Just my opinion, Dutch greetings to ya and tx for the video 🍀

[DylanKoster]

I love your energy! So vibrant :) good luck with your channel!

[oguguaonyinyechi]

Thank you for always sharing your experience sis! You are so beautiful ❤️

[tamalibutvs]

Thank you for appointing that people shouldn't be offended or take it personal.
We are direct but honest.
Even my best friends can say to me: "I don't like your shoes"
And thats okay!
I'd rather have a friend who is honest, but is not lying to my face to make me feel good.
Because then you're living a lie and have friends who are not sincere.

[Bianca_Toeps]

As Dutch people often say: "If you don't want an honest answer, you shouldn't ask the question." I really like that about Dutch culture. As someone who is moving to Japan soon, I really had to get used to all the "maaaayyyybe", "hmmm, difficult" and just head tilts over there, that in reality just mean "no". Then again, as a foreigner, you can sometimes push through that, because if you don't take the hint and just keep standing at their desk or something, they might just do it anyway to get rid of the awkward situation. (I'm not saying you should disrespect them... I only noticed that this happened afterwards.)

[CrownRider]

It is not only directness in words. It also the way they look at you. I almost always recognize Dutch fellow citizens when I meet them abroad. Their eyes probe your brain before saying anything...

[Olive-efsl]

I read the book 'The culture map' I think it shows Dutch culture very well in the context of work environment. One thing you mentioned about Dutch people being offended by directness the book describes with an example of a Korean manager who thought the best way to deal with the Dutch directness is to also be very direct to his employees in return.

The Dutch employees were offended by that. I think that is because for me as a Dutch person I only appreciate directness if it is from someone I am close to. Because if I know them I value their opinion but if I don't know them I might be offended by that.

I think that is the difficulty of culture, if you are not fully immersed in it you can misjudge the proper situation when to be direct and people can still be offended.

[lindaraterink]

I like people being direct to me, because even when maybe it is hurtfull, I will know you are an honest person. I don't like two faced people that say one thing but clearly mean something else. That to me is disrespectfull no mater what your age or rank is.

[dutchuncle]

Really enjoyed your comment about African Mama’s, if you feel a bit homesick and want to experience the ultimate form, just get to know an elderly Surinamese woman who has lived in The Netherlands for most of her live. They are queens and rule their family with an iron hand. Believe me I known from first hand experience.
My mother in law wasn’t a bad person but she always said exactly what she wanted and most of the time got her way in everything.

[AllHope]

I think the Dutch are polite generally but there are situations where the directness comes across as mean... for example inthis video.


On the other hand, english has "registers" i.e. a code of appropriateness. Technically, if a Dutchie has to speak in Engels, the unwritten aspects of it must follow as language is a primary vehicle of culture...

[annebokma]

We don't like sugarcoating because it delays solving a situation. We tell you what we think you need to hear, but we are usually willing to help you solve it. But if you react badly to the truth we will walk away.. untill you come to your senses.
In that sense we are goal driven, we listen, we care, but we don't do bs for bs sake

[whl]

I am Dutch but live in the US, you are amazing, such beautiful energy 😘

[NergizEP]

Hahahaha laughed so hard! Welcome in the Netherlands🍀.

[bethelchima]

Hi, thanks for this..I enjoy watching your videos..Am also planning to relocate from Poland to Netherlands for my Msc and probably get a job there and settle there too..but am having problems in choosing a university where I can study Supply chain management and logistics...Can you help me make that decision?Am Nigerian..

[ninacharles]

Will definitely align well amongst the Dutch cos this is so me even as a Nigerian.. Nigerian aunties don’t like me😂😂. Love it 🥰

[francaogugua]

You would not have wished to be me with my mum's 'directness' lol
A good recap. keep it coming! x

[nambasaashamiah]

Thanks dear for the work you are doing now me am Ugandan but am just asking is it very easy to come to Holland

[jannetteberends]

As soon as you mentioned Africans mamas I thought about ‘Ake: the years of childhood’ by Wole Soyinka. How he described his mother gave me an idea of African mamas.