Why are so many young people lgbtq+?

CHAPTERS
00:00 Intro
01:38 Are the old people lying?
03:07 Is the world gayer now?
05:16 Is the world scary?
07:18 Is it an internet thing?
10:21 Could it be that we are missing people?
13:35 The world doesn't seem that gay to me though?
15:51 Outro

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[HotDogTimeMachine]

The same reason why there's suddenly more lefthanded people.
When you stop punishing and criminalizing people for being different they come out. It's incredibly simple.

[teresasimpson]

I turned 62 today. Thanks to the internet I discovered what Asexual was (when I was 50). I know if Id had the information when I was younger I think I would have come out in my 20's. I grew up knowing I didnt like boys or girls (in that way). I was always the perfect 3rd wheel for my friends to take on a date, lol

[erint]

One point that I would like to add: we don't have data on the number of Queer people who took their own lives because they lived in such a bigoted world ❤ we only know that even in our relatively different world this is still an issue.

[iupiter.]

My grandma is bi and I'm the only one who knows, because I came out to her first and she was always scared of judgement. She even was in a relationship with a girl for 2 years in the 60s!

[jerrihadding]

So, I’m a 74 year old female bi and I lived through the AIDS epidemic in California losing men to death whom were dear friends and in one case, a partner to me. This man and I were in a non-monogamous relationship for 17 years until his death from AIDS. We deeply cherished each other and managed to trust our love even though both of us had frequent, regular sex with other partners. Looking back I can only marvel. We had stopped our (highly satisfying) sexual relationship about five years before his death because both of us had committed to monogamous relationships. Which undoubtedly saved my life. And he told me “At least there is one person I love whom I am not killing.” These words still break my heart.

[ronjaj.addams-ramstedt]

Regarding fewer older queer people: in addition to stigma, legal complications, and self-denial, one more sad fact (added: that Jessica addresses from 10:30 onward) is that we tended to not live as long as straight people of comparable other demographic traits, and IIRC this difference has still not entirely disappeared. Especially AIDS took away a swath of our elders.

[lisam]

My sister was a baby boomer and didn't come out until her mid 30's (early 90's). Unfortunately she was only able to live openly as who she was for another decade before illness took her from us. The thing people need to remember is that until very, very recently, if you came out and lived openly as LGBTQ+, you risked your job, your home (yes, people were evicted for being gay...especially at the start of the AIDS crisis), your family and friends, your medical care and sometimes your freedom. So many people lived secret lives just so they could have the same rights as everyone else. Now with all of these hate laws being passed as quickly as they can be (thankfully the courts are striking a lot of them down) a certain group of people are trying to drag us back to those bad old days. It won't work, but it does piss me off that we have to fight this same fight again.

[mediamom]

I was a staunch lgbt+ ally until I realized I was bisexual at a *very* late age (tail end of baby boomer generation). All three of my bisexual children were quietly waiting for me to sort it out for myself 😂. Nothing really changed except now I understand myself better. Talking about all of this openly saves lives. Love your videos! 🌈

[krystlepoulin]

Yes, Boomers and Gen X lie about being gay. Growing up, I remember seeing my aunt light up when she saw her best friend in a way she never lit up for her husband. Her husband lit up for his best friend in a way he didn't light up for her either. I had exposure to lots of happy marriages to compare them too, and it was obvious, even to a young child, that they loved their "special friends" more than each other. They never admitted to having a lavender marriage, but it was obvious they made each other miserable and would have been much happier being their authentic selves. Instead of coming out of the closet, they used a Christian church so conservative it was basically a socially acceptable cult to indoctrinate their kids to be homophobic and now that he's dead she still can't come out because her kids would hate her. It's awful, but yes, they're lying. They're lying to us, and they're lying to themselves.

[rainbowcollective]

I’m part of gen z but I grew up in a very homophobic and transphobic family but once I was outside of there there was this openness of my fellow lgbtq+ peers and it actually helped me unlearn a lot of it quicker than expected. The internet was as a very important part of this too

[jennifers]

That picture of the choir in black and white is such a powerful and moving image. ❤😔

[darlalathan]

I'm a Baby Boomer who didn't even know I was transgender or bisexual until I was diagnosed by a therapist in 2005. Until then, I thought I was a straight ally, from high school to college. I came out in 2006 and have lived as a female ever since! I had to fight off several gay-bashing attempts in my first year with pepper spray. I scared off a skinhead, a couple in a passing pickup truck, and 4 hip-hop thugs in an SUV. After that, nobody attacked me again! Cops call me "ma'am" and treat me like a lady! I now live with two roommates: a bisexual transgender ex-drag queen and a gay leather man and furry. Teens and little girls think I'm cool, compliment my clothes, and take selfies with me! Cosplayers complimented my outfit the other day at an anime convention! I met several crossplayers! I played Uno with two non-binary people in pink maid costumes!

[cyclingknitter]

As a very young millenial asexual, no way I would have figured that out without the internet. Even with it, I spent ~10 years waiting to catch up with my peers/wondering what was wrong with me because I was just not presented it as an option.

[bethanykennedy]

I'm Generation X and bisexual. I was raised in Arkansas in the 80s and 90s. I was raised to believe anyone not straight was gay and anyone gay was wrong. Period end of discussion. So when I was attracted to other females, I suppressed those feelings. I dismissed them as fleeting moments. I was still attracted to males. So there was no reason to have to deal with the issue. Or so I thought. Years of therapy and going to college have helped me see that my upbringing was wrong, not me. Others, who fit a similar demographic, may have entered straight marriages and stayed in them. (I left mine). So they may know somewhere in them that they have these thoughts and feelings. But they still identify as straight because they have always been in straight relationships. And sadly many still believe that LGBTQ+ is wrong. Admitting they have those feeling is equivalent in their minds to admitting they've done something wrong.

[ERYN__]

My mom has said a few things about her attraction to women, but she "shut that down." She talked about how hard it was growing up as a tomboy. She also talked about how mental illness was stigmatized in her day. When I first came out to my parents, I didn't really do a good job of it. I was 14 and really, really drunk after sneaking out with a friend at a slumber party to drink with other friends. I just screamed, "I'm going to hell because I'm gay, " as my parents drove me to the hospital. Dad said, "You're not going there today" because that was his sense of humor. Mom insisted that I attend Catholic school for high school (the next year) because public schools "made it cool to be gay." Odd that we were Methodists, and she made a point to tell me I was baptized by a closeted gay minister (not sure of the current United Methodist stance, but then you could be gay and part of clergy, but if you were out you couldn't get paid). Maybe I should have clarified "Bi" instead of "Gay." A month later, I started dating the boy who would become my husband, so I feel like mom would add that "just a phase" argument. I am polyamorous, and with my boyfriend's consent, I started dating women. I told my mom about a woman I was going on a date with, and she insisted on calling it "going on an outing." I'm happily married with a baby on the way, and I'm not currently dating, but open. I am working on my relationship with my mom, but considering cutting her off. I don't know if I want her to have a relationship with my children, I have told her I'm pregnant, but I have not told her she is going to be a "grandmother."

[thetransavenger]

as a trans women it feels like i came out at the wrong time with all the anti trans bills and rhetoric, but it feels more like the best time everyone has been amazing and supportive and i feel like if i came out 20 or 30 yrs ago it would be a world away from what i have experienced

[mariahdrogitis]

I’m a lesbian gen x and came out in 1995 at 15. I’d say the world wasn’t very accepting back then. My family wasn’t very supportive and then went through times of being more accepting later… but 4 years ago my mother stopped talking to me because I had a baby with my wife who I’ve been with for 10 years. I haven’t spoken to my mother since.. I want to though. It breaks my heart that she feels that way but what can I do? I see the anti trans and anti Lgbtq rhetoric and violence resurgence happening very quickly. I live in Oregon apparently a very accepting state, and this month alone we have had several acts of violence ant threats to lgbtq community. We had proud boys show up to a high school pride even where children and families were present and the proud boys showed up heavily armed. Then just this week someone threw bricks and rocks through windows with rainbow signs including one of our lgbtq friendly churches. My friends bookstore also damaged. All of these laws policies and politics polarization around lgbtq issues has emboldened people to commit acts of violence and make threats. It’s become pretty scary especially with people brandishing weapons and guns lgbtq events. Who knows if that will turn into another massacre on lgbtq people.. I am afraid to bring my 3 year old to a pride event for that reason. I love her more than my own life and don’t ever want to put her in danger. I love learning about our history in this century and before. It fortifies me to know what others have gone through before and had the courage to be themselves and fight for their right to a dignified life. I’m so proud of them and I am proud of all of us in the lgbtq community. The fight is definitely not over and we need to stick together and vote and support each other.

[franzi]

I had a very eye opening conversation a few months ago. My grandpa and I were looking at pictures of our family on vacation. And we would visit these friends of my grandparents multiple times. They were both women but I never questioned their relationship to each other because why would I? I assumed they were friends and that maybe their husbands had passed away or that they were simply both single.
As we were looking at these picture my grandpa said:”Oh remembers these two? They were apparently in a relationship with each other.“

He just said it so casually but for me it was so eye opening and just outright amazing. I never had any queer people surrounding me growing up. But that made me realize that maybe I did but just did not realize it…

I hope they are thriving and happy they must be over 75 now

[Biggestgayestbird]

I wanna shout out the baby boomers and gen Xers who are only now realizing they’re LGBTQ+ because they’re still absolutely critical members of our community and their stories matter!
My mom and I came out the same year, I was 13, and she was 45. She always feels like she overstepping speaking about her experiences because she partnered with exclusively men for so long. It absolutely breaks my heart because her stories absolutely matter, and she deserves just as much space as I do!

[MichelleSweeny]

i would be interested to also discus the statistics of suicide. and also discussing the fact that many gay people from the older generations shut down their orientation and tried to live heterosexual lives, only to face depression, divorce, and misery.